Lonely
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I suffer at home
Do you like the show?
I suffer at school
Do you like to be cruel?
I struggle to cry
When Winter winds begin to whirl around
and whisper through my long and lonely days,
I’ll light the fire and stoke it with a poem
and hope I find some comfort in a phrase.
The dark green leaves swaying above us, as the wind softly blows.
The water ripples, making soft lapping sounds at the shore.
The geese puff up their feathers, squawking and flapping wildly.
The dark green leaves swaying above us, as the wind softly blows.
The water ripples, making soft lapping sounds at the shore.
The geese puff up their feathers, squawking and flapping wildly.
We fell in love in late spring
As cool wind nipped at our cheeks
we found warmth in each others bodies
Our love blossomed into the summer
Hot, sunny days
Walking trails hand in hand
I think I lost myself, again Because here I am, fondling the sheets at 3am, looking for you in the darkness I only feel comfortable, if you are around And I can't eat, unless I feed you first
No matter how many times I tell myself not to, I can't stop myself from watching it,
And everytime I do, I am always left feeling like my heart took a hit.
Sometimes it's hard to admit it, but sometimes you need to accept defeat,
And that the future that you thought you were heading towards ends up not being so sweet.
Sometimes it's hard to admit it, but sometimes you need to accept defeat,
And that the future that you thought you were heading towards ends up not being so sweet.
I always used to say I hated summer
Something about the heat
Or the sun burns
Or the bugs flying around
No matter where you go
But it wasn’t entirely true
You see
It’s true that I hated summer
Nobody notices me
I feel like a ghost
They assume that I'm fine
Though I'm worse off than most
I'm not even sure
If I'm dead or alive
I not really living
I just want to survive
Touch me
Touch me
Let flesh meet flesh
Warmth meet warmth
Let your skin know that mine is near
That I am here
That we are not alone
Not now at least
Hold me
In the dark
I drove home yesterday.
All the way from north to south.
I drove home yesterday.
Not a sound escaped my mouth.
I drove home yesterday.
I am not going to sit here and pretend that I am okay,
Cause if I am being honest, it really changes and I have to take it day by day.
One day I go to bed smiling and I am still very hopeful for the future and what it can bring,
My heart aches and yearns,
my eyes have no more tears to shed,
like experiencing a drought
my mind can't think straight anymore, it can't focus
you fill my head, day and night
i am weary
As embers in the night,
you set my heart on fire
intense and violent, wildly out of control
spreading intensely
i find myself lost in the thought, that is "you"
though maybe it was my own wishful thinking
I cry, but only by myself
Constantly I reminisce about us
Red was the setting sun, setting your silhouette ablaze
Your smile which shined brighter than any star
I keep wondering if you think about me still
Why is it we have desperation and reliability on one person we want when we can’t have?
The worst feeling that won’t go away until they say yes, and deepens when they go away.
After you I spent years looking for love.
For someone to fix what had been broken
But I was wrong.
If you look for love when you are broken,
All you will find is broken love.
Am I alone? The only wanderer.
Drift wood in a sea of rain drops
Flowing with the breeze
Against the waves as they flow
Is this it? Watching the sun set
A mosaic on the horizon
Mask up
Six feet apart please
Forget your own name
You won't need to speak
Don't cough in public
Wash your hands
Remember hand sanitizer
Follow the demands
The virus is super bad
The halls crowd around me
As I push through bodies and backpacks
My feet fall lightly
On the dirty concrete floor
Students laugh
Students cry
Everyone is lost
In their own self-centeredness
My empathy is something I prize highly
I know how to heal, to help people lightly
I know what they need to hear and do
This is a skill I'd even since young knew
But heavily it takes it's toll
One little girl staring out the window
She is alone but not lonely
She has a dove
Sometimes she shares her secrets
Sometimes she just stays silent
Days pass by
Then months
and then Years
The wind does blow on a cold winter night,
But this night, no one listens.
The snow drifts softly upon the grass,
But there are no feet to tread upon it.
Time does not stop, and time does not slow,
Is my soul so lonely that one conversation manifests into an entire fantasy?
It hurts to know my mind will be preoccupied for ages, but I've probably already been forgotten.
When you’re stuck at the bottom of the sea
No one can hear you shout
No one can hear you Plea
It’s too deep to pull you out
Many people try
Y░o░u░r░ ░t░o░n░g░u░e░'░s░ ░a░ ░n░o░o░s░e░
░A░n░d░ ░I░ ░h░u░n░g░ ░o░n░ ░e░v░e░r░y░ ░w░o░r░d░.░
Walking around
I feel bad
I don't know
I don't have nothing
I don't have you
I don't have family
Is this my future
I dream whit a home
Not a house.
When I was a child, I made a wish.
It was a stupid wish.
I didn't wish to have powers or be a hero.
or even to be liked.
Though i didn't have any of those things either.
I had wished to be remembered.
is it me, or just a comforting presenceone that wont look at you wrong, a fear of feeling i may never be more than you wanted me to bea wild feeling, one i cant escape are you a feeling, or true comfortsecurity, safety, and seamless satire who am
Flowers in white, pink, and purple
Bewitched my eyes, so gloomful.
I hate to see your demise.
Farewell to this lonely face.
Release me from my cage.
Lonely, I sit here filled with rage.
Do you enjoy seeing your prey aroused at the sight of you?
Of course, you do!
She had seen this play before
He wanted now and nothing more.
That made it kind of easy to let him have his way . No use pretending about the coming day .
Why does red always have to be the neglected pen colorIt’s such a bright vibrant color but no one wants to use itPeople need to know that red is powerfulBut also passionate and beautifulYou need not fear the red pen
How happy am I to call my friend.
To hear the voice of someone who cares.
Friend says. "I only have two friends"
"friend one,"
"and friend two."
Oh.
you're so uniquely your own
so perfectly imperfect that it makes my heart hurt just thinking of you
but i'm so scared because no matter how much i need you
you'll never need me with the same earnest.
I wonder,
sometimes,
if all my friends are forgetting me.
If someday
I will stop seeing them,
stop hearing their voices,
if one day
they will simply
disappear
from my life.
Don't you dare believe I just 'left' you.My love will always burn inside of me for 'My Boo",For you're the first and only who I let take a chunk of me.It stabs me inside knowing I waited 20 years for an AIT fling,
i've always known
i've never been the favorite child
off kilter and distant
like a drunk on the curb
so i guess it makes sense
that you've finally let go
of my cold hands
I know you are not here for me
I kneeled and prayed to the trees
the trees only my lips had kissed
whalst you kissed her silhotte
she was missed, but not quite gone
You had known me long
He brings joy to me,
his laugh makes my heart smile,
his eyes, like the sea.
Endless charm is his style,
and he is my willow tree.
I worry for tomorrow, will there be another day?
I try to stay strong, but the pain won't go away.
We're consumed by this anguish, trapped in solitude.
I read a poem to my dad.
He said he didn't understand.
And it was too long.
I didn't understand that.
He doesn't know big words.
He asks me the meaning.
Of that one word.
I know the word.
My life has been on hold for so long I didn’t even realise
No progress has become the new norm
While I sit here and wait for you to love me
Like once upon a time when we were both so young
I need a reason to fall in love again.
To let gravity take me without catching myself.
To believe that I deserve more than I let myself take.
After all, how can a heart be broken if there is nothing left to break?
i think a lot about sitting on the roof
under the starlight, stars bright
hot chocolate one night,
it's storytime for the moon
but my windows are painted s h u t
and it's a long way d
I eased my eyes wide open
As the day had already started
My uneasy mind is stranded
Lingering effects from last night’s last call
The nights are hard to handle
And the pills are hard to swallow
All my life I've been told that home is where the heart is
But that was the last thing you took from me
Leaving me with only scraps of wood for support
As I crumble to bits and pieces from a broken heart
Me: "Was it easy?"
Him: "Was what easy?"
Me: "How one day you considered me your everything
and the next day you decided this love was nothing.
That we were nothing. That I was nothing."
Im sitting in my house and weighing the options.
If I go out, I may get sick, but I have a death wish anyway so bring it on.
If I stay in this house any longer I am going to turn into Jack Nicholson.
I want to see my boy,
It's Monday night.
I'm sitting in the shower, with the curtain between the water and my phone
but the water still hits my body.
They say lonely people take longer showers because the hot water eases
I want to die.
It's been a while since I said that out loud
The screaming voices of the world have sworn me to secrecy
But it’s true.
I’m not afraid to say it
Not afraid to accept the inevitable
Depression isn’t gentle
She doesn’t knock when she enters the room
Or text you before she comes over
Instead she kicks down the door and takes what is hers
She does not need your opinion
Depression grips my wrist like a child in a storm
Holding me a hostage, in my head and in my dorm
Filling me with sadness that cannot be explained
Like my head is full of cannon balls and my ankles all but chained.
i am nothing to everyone
and the weight of that nothingness
feels like i am holding up the universe
on two bony shoulders and a curved spine
this greek myth
Why
I wonder
As the sun warms my face
A quiet cold day
Where I feel a semblance of grace
Why
I wonder
Did he send me away?
Now it wasn't his fault
I knew that, anyway.
the room is empty; the wind, stopped.
the room is quiet; the world, silent.
the room is dark, the light has left.
the room is cold, the warmth decided to leave.
I feel like a bubble of emotion
Floating in the ease of your presence
But I think I am always waiting
For the inevitable "POP"
And knowing it wouldn't be possible
To put us back together
You seem far to lonely to be saying you don't miss me
Could it be chaos is just in our genes?
You seem far too lonely to be saying that you'd rather leave
It's okay to say to you're lying to me
I was a kid with fear residing inside me,
My biggest fear was my grandma.
Mostly children love their grandma,
But I hated her & was afraid of her,
And my biggest worry was to face her.
<3
we were different but the same
my heart: the ground
and yours: the rain
hand and hand we ran around
shocking jealousy through everyone in town
we were thunder and lightning
my call goes out across the seas
it echos back to no one but me
a cry of love that’s never heard
an idea that can’t be that absurd
nothing i am feeling is anything unique to the human experience.
i love you,
but how can you believe me?
you can't know how much i mean it.
Darkness is to me,
Like demons are to Hell.
My cold and lonely residence
Kept hidden in this shell.
"I'll teach you how to smile", they say
"I'll teach you how to shine.
I'll teach you how to love,
Thoughts invite Emotions to a dance
An elegant waltz
They don't skip a step
For the fear of telling the story wrong looms over their heads like the gleaming chandelier
Held together like glue
Far away in mind but close in heart
The time well spent is more than I could need
Yet I’m still feeling the tears I left on your shirt
I give everything I can
(in fear that you'll leave)
my time my home my patience
and don't expect to receive
I can't lose another best friend
(because I lost more)
my love my trust my faith
the taste on my tongue
of bitter words
that could leave you stung
the fire in my heart
of frustrated feelings
that would lead me to fall apart
the thoughts in my head
dressed in blue
I feel golden
dancing with you
my heart holden
high heeled shoes
I feel beautiful
dancing with you
moments so meaningful
posed together
no matter where I go
a part of me always feels so alone
Something always tells me
don't get too comfortable
then they will see
they will see the shame
the guilt of fame
dancing around until laughter broke
made me your reason to smile
because I am a joke
call me a friend
but I think of myself as a jester
providing happy distractions without end
I will speak my mind
with the courage I can't find
my words and needs left behind
do my best to keep you blind
leave you thinking I'm kind
but really I can't speak my mind
My anxiety comes
with its own background music;
DUN DUN DUN.
It marks itself present
with bitten nails and
peeled skin around it.
And that's when my
nightmares begin.
Can you feel it?
My disparity,
It’s there and all I feel.
I’m desperate for you,
Your touch,
i don't know,
why i'm not dead.
i might not make it,
home to bed.
darkness is,
my only friend.
i'll fall asleep,
in a pool of red.
Lonely
I'm so lonely
I want to love
But there is no one to love
No one wants me
They all avoid me
Sending me flares and stares
Talking isn't rare
I feel a desire
To hold a hand
Sitting in the middle of a room filled with chatter
Even if I had an acquaintance here, it wouldn’t matter
No one is truly a friend
No one told me,
That surviving,
Was like seeing blind,
With no clear direction,
Mistakes on every turn,
Stumbling after something,
And almost always lost.
I was never taught,
The truth is... I don’t know what love means. Seriously. What is this thing we humans call "love"?
In the silent wilderness, wasn’t so silent
My thoughts racing threw my mind, they all seemed so blind.
As I claimed to be fine, my limits have now ultimately crossed the line.
We are still the children painting pictures to hang on the fridge,
but now it's too late to start over.
Too late to pick a different color.
Every stroke is a different future and every drop a different reality.
The hallways linger with the memories of us
the smooth warmth your hand left on mine
silent smiles
the music our souls sang still echos
if you are quiet enough you can hear the laughs we shared
This place is always a little lonely
At the weekends...no noise and life;
I like solitude,
But not in places
Where there’s recently been
A lot of people.
Reclusiveness protects you
How my heart can ache for the lonely,
Then I’d like to comfort them all,
Hold them close
Until their sorrow goes,
This great big world
Can seem so cold,
O woe, some end up alone,
Oh, at long last,
I’ve found you,
Although, the news
Ain’t so good,
Seems you found love…
You seem happy,
And so fulfilled
But did I think that,
You’d be lonely,
Time, only lonely.
Her only friend-herself.
Only empty thoughts.
Only dreams she never drempt
Goals never achived.
She strived for more
More closeness
More intimacy
Only more, but
I am a man.
I’m sure my reputation proceeds me
I know just how you’ll perceive me
But I’m begging please believe me
Please open your eyes and see me
I am a human
To be truly helpless is a commitment .
Were all born more or less equal ...
Yeah , many rightfully disagree .
Come on , give me a starting point here .
So , you shit the bed once or twice .
Rusty hinges, a noisy gate.
Echo rattling through pure hate.
Flooded engine , well that’s great.
Cavaly arrives a bit too late.
Where it’s at and where it was .
He won’t accept that word “because.”
The grain on the flooring flows smoothly much of time..
Sometimes though , they know why it’s Naughty Pine.
Sitting in a rocker , she likes to while away the time.
She usually runs in neutral even though it’s futile .
Imma never gonna settle just to be her friend.
Crazed and manic , I’ll be patient and push it to the end.
i'll admit it
i am not much of a poet
i do not know much about rhyming
i just know about the individual
and how it is hard to be original
how we sit here and talk about nothing
Do you remember the days, the nights, the adventures we always used to share? Flying away on wings of laughter that were built on mutual care. Five good friends and lots of fun was all I used to need.
When I was a boy
sometime ago
I faced a problem
and wanted to let go.
I felt scared
but wasn't sure where
and I was not strong.
I had little courage
All I want to do is be quite,A place in nowhere where I want to hide.Let it be rainy, the weather is calmLet this place be the one where others can come.
welcome friend, it's dark down here.
for most, it's much too grim
the table's set with plates half empty
the cups spill o'er their rims
I'm sorry I closed off
Home
My mother is yelling
about how she hates her life.
I can practically see her exasperated expression
as she slams pots and pans.
I am in a constant state of dream and nightmare
One moment,
The sun is smiling at me,
showing me the world in bright colours,
helping me laught at the bipolarity of life.
Once upon a time there was a sad little girlwho sat at the swings alonewaiting for someone to occupy the empty swing next to herso they'd swing togetherand she'd feel a little less lonely
There’s a billion stars in the sky
And only one moon.
It’s a gift to be alone,
But a price for solitude.
vodka bottles,
secrets,
and pain.
these are the memories that haunt my brain.
total disfunction,
chaos,
and abandonment.
this is when i learned i was in the midst of adolescence.
Those voices I hear in the hallways,
Somehow always used to torment me.
Cruel words escaped their lips.
Poison vowels and sounds,
Yet I was taught they were good.
I was born this way...
When I fell in love the first time,
She felt the same pain as me,
I shared with her a song
One that we listened to together
Its lyrics always soothed us
Grace be that flower and how she glistens.
Your eyes sift along and you don't see truth,
It's not about the grace but who listens.
She will need you to see through to the youth;
Why am I the only one?
Why don't they give up?
I already know how bad I've done
But all I say is ‘suck it up
No one cares that's It's hard
This holiday is hollow,
These cheery ones are lost.
Everyone is happy,
It seems
Everyone
But me.
I always feel alone,
I’ve been in love twice,
One was dark
The other light.
Both had their qualities,
I loved them for different reasons.
The dark one was like me,
Oh Oviedo, Florida
How I adore you
I’ve never seen you
But I know where you are
Jacquelyn and Amanda
Talk of road trips heading West
Oh, how I hate this day,
It reminds me of everyone I’ve lost.
It fills my soul with dread,
It breaks down my mind.
It reminds me that I’m alone,
Oh weary traveler,
Who are you to hate the summer?
You, who burns in the winter
Who knows no cozy cabin to call home
You jump from place to place
Play me a song
‘Cause I’m feeling lonely
Like the sad lyrics
Of a Troye Sivan single
Fuck it,
I’ll dance all by myself
I come to the realisation
that
I can’t remember those winters,
the winters of my childhood.
It was really good at all times,
and it was really bad.
Now it’s bad all the time.
You gave me love for one day
I see you constantly and what do you say?
Absolutely nothing
I am told this is the way you are
That you love to be loved and fail to give any
at the age of twenty-four, i will stand at the foot of my bed and stare down at the single imprint in the mattress
where my body laid for four days.
as a profession of loneliness,
go through the motions
with no empathy
I lack all emotions
I live like a tree.
rooted in one place,
while others move on.
I don't understand.
or know how to love.
I give it my hardest
I see his face and her face, I see all the rest
But do you not see the hole in my chest?
I hear his voice and her voice, I hear theirs too
But darling, where's your voice? I only want you.
Hey, you.
Yeah, you.
It's ok to be sad.
But I just wanna tell you that you're loved.
Okay?
It's ok to want to be alone.
But I just wanna tell you that I'm here for you.
Okay?
I am
A grandmother without wrinkles,
A raven without feathers,
A mother without children.
I am
A writer with no paper,
A singer with no listeners,
A wind with no kites.
You told me, "It's over..." again. I know that, Jorge... It's been over.
You know that and I know that.. And of course...
You KNOW I know that.. So who was the validation for?
There's a place for everything and everything in its place..
Well, where do I put the memories of the past I can't erase?
If I could build the truth for you, I'd make it out of titanium steel...
I'd weld it together with all of the reasons -WHY- I STILL feel the way that I feel...
FOR: My Ex Now, but My Love ONE 4ever.. J.G. (*BTW, MOST of poems are about him....)
I'm glad you took everything that would remind me of you..
Cause I don't want to remember anything we went through.
If today I die purposefully,
just know it wasn’t me.
All these voices in my head,
they keep me up.
At night I barely sleep.
No one had prepared me
For Winter.
That black cold
Struck you to the bone.
Not even the moon shone
Through my smog.
i dont know if im really who i say i am if im happy if im great who knows what i am no one but me. but im making sure that even knows my image and my heart im sad and happy who i am limbo i just want to obtain that one thing every human desires ha
My heart feels so empty whenever you're not near
I wish from deep inside of me, you can always be here
I know though that you would soon grow sick, glued unto my side
As my aura slowly kills everything aside
I wish I was okay
But I'm not
I wish things weren't this way
But they are
Tell me this much
Not just enough to leave you alone
Tell me much more
So I can feel you soul
Sometimes by Brandon Arthur King Sometimes, the brightest lights cast the darkest shadows.
Am I scared of lonely?
I won’t let it take a hold or control of me
But it definitely consumes me
An old house upon the hill
Sitting quietly, sitting still
Dusty everywhere with dirty windows cracked
Broken down shelves and old books stacked
Moth-eaten rugs and rotted boards
Oh jeez lo wezz. Away from my nuclear family.Feeling with so much anxiety. Belong an adult is kinda hard.I might be a house of cards. Trying to stay.But lately, I’ve been feeling so grey. These pills I take somewhat help.Even though I might yelp.
I see you running through the rain
I know its a stretch
Even for my fantastical childish dreams
But I still can see it
No more tears left
Your on your own
Sleepless nights
All alone
It shouldn't be this way
Love isn't cold.
Wasted hours
Day and night
Hand on your heart
And all was right
LEFT ON THE STREET
ALL ALONE
SO LONELY IN THE COLD AND DARK PLACE
WHERE THEY AREN'T ENOUGH SPACE
SO MUCH PAINFUL EMOTIONS CLOUDED ON THEIR FACES
IT BECAME A BURDEN THEY COULDN'T EXPRESSED IN WORDS
The dagger in my heart,
It twists,
Alas, My love for you has only hurt me.
I should have known better
Than To fall in love with
Nothing less than a prince
Who saw himself as little more than a pig.
I wanna try so hard
For you
Only for you
Because maybe in the end
You can yell
"He's mine"
Im sorry Im Lost and im not man enough for you
im trying so so hard to change
As we wait for the inevitability that is death
We joke and cry and Laugh while we pass our sorrows around
We are all children down to the core
I mean, Who wants to Grow up and be alone?
Never let your Past catch up to yourself
No matter how much the past stabs your back
keep your head up and run with those who give you hope
We as humans are born to endure hatred and Depression
Smile for yourself
Make sure everyone knows you're alive
No one Exists for a Second
The little things matter more than you think
Being told you're Pretty
Being told you're Amazing
And most importantly
We sing like Rain
We scream like Thunder
We shine Like lightning hitting the Crashing Waves
We Mourn like the Storm finally calming itself
We are gloom like the grey Skyies after a Hurricane
You will leave me, we will part,
We will bid our last goodbyes.
There will be lonely nights,
And days of missing,
But not now.
Because right now I am here,
And you are here
In my arms.
Rest in peace:
To the person no one recognizes,
Dying a death, a lonely death.
Rest in peace:
To the skinny girl in Africa;
The starving didn't get to her as fast as the AIDS.
Rest in peace:
Too far,
They don't know me
Too close,
They can hurt me
They can break me
They can build me
But, where are they?
Walking through the talking woods,
looking at the reflecting water,
I see a bag of old goods
and empty bottles underwater.
Dear past oppressors,
I don't forgive your malice.
I don't know if I ever will.
The damage done is certain,
all your taunts, they haunt me still.
My self-image has been shattered.
This is....
For that little boy wondering why his parents never look at him with pride in their eyes.
For that little girl who when her parent begin to yell, she starts to cry.
dear nicholas and twila,
when i was so much younger
i was sad and often cried
i always felt alone
no matter how hard i tried
Dear Katherine,
My friend. My love. My life.
It’s was a new year.
I was starting over.
Not sure who to trust.
Not sure where to go.
Then I saw you.
Recognized your face.
I can’t eat dinner alone.
What I mean by alone is simply that I cannot eat dinner idly
If I eat dinner by itself and without anything for my hands to touch, hold, see or do, I sort of lose myself.
Our Differences
Hold your tongue tightly
It is vile and inconsiderate
Speaking pompous things to
Put your generation above me
And I say to you, silence
Our lives are not the same
Dear Ex Best Friend,
I stand upon the shore of roaring sea
Attempting to see all that I have lost.
I dream what might have been and still might be.
Blood rushed down his arm
Just like tears rush down her face
There's fire in his eyes
And an overdose in her veins
Lord help these children, they've dot so much more to live for
God why can’t I talk fluently to others?
My words become indistinct, just fragments
In my head their fervour cause a shutter
An impact captivating like a comet
what's left to say in those whispering tones?
got gasoline in my brain
and ink on my bones.
what's left to recall me; but the walls of my cell?
they say it will heal.
but i think that was hell.
Dear depression,
As the tears
stream down my face
I begin to feel like
A disgrace
“we cant help you if you don’t speak”
Is what they always say
But what they do not know
It feels unusual to open your eyes.
In the morning glow, thats blinding.
A slow rate, accelerating like your being reborn, like your entering heavens gates.
Yes
I know
I know
You aren’t so little anymore, I
Understand
I understand more than you can
Ever realize
Lonely girl, why so blue? Breathe out, breathe in,Lonely girl without a clueTrial an error, alone she will goClose your eyes dearJust go with the flow
I lie in bed at night and pretend the stuffed animal is you.
If I focus long and hard maybe I’ll imagine your heartbeat
Maybe I’ll feel your arm wrapped around my waist
Empty Pages
Writer’s block is
like thinking you’ve met a man
you could give your all to
at the stage of his life when his ego is inflated like the dollar
She's in a new world
Lonely girl, where are your parents?
A new area, so familiar but never explored
Adventure awaits those who seek it
She's taking the next step, just as useless as before
Lonely?
No, i'm not lonely.
There's too many things around
for me to sit long enough
to feel the emptiness
of walking
to class in the morning
or at meal time
with friends that smile
Dear Loneliness,
I remember how you came into my life at the age of nine
When all my friends stood together at the front of the lunch line
Even if I pass away,
The world will be spinning,
Wrapped around the sun,
As dusks falls,
And morning comes.
wide awake
once again
hoping sleep will be my friend
but for now
its late
late at night
my mind too filled to drift away
Can't move.
Cant talk.
Inside this wooden box.
Been here since the service day,
And in here is where i'll stay.
You are not alone
I am not alone
In the end, what we all want
is to look across that vast ocean and see a mind that is like our own
to know that there's a reason to keep swimming
I am my own Alice
seeking a non-existent
wonderland,
I am a butterfly
fluttering about in
a flowerless field,
I am a pen
deprived of
the badly needed ink,
Dear fluffy, brown, recliner
You sit in the corner of the room I used to share with my sister
But now she’s gone
The room is quiet
But there’s room for you
I guess it was a sort of trade-off
Rotten Apples
Rotten Apples
I’m the apple at the bottom of the tree
I smoke a joint by myself I married Mr. Lonely
I got boogers in my nose
I got cheese between my toes
Rotten Apples
I am the invisible woman.
My name is ‘I Don’t Know’.
I am nothing and nobody
from nowhere
going no place in particular.
My body is made from mediocrity and wasted potential.
Silence is both a friend and an enemy.
It sings out when you are alone, laying over you like a blanket.
Its presence is either comforting or smothering, yet somehow both.
It is the empty gap after a risky action.
There was a girl with long blonde hair
And dark blue eyes as deep as the sea.
There was a girl who feel in deep
and fell in love with me.
But it was time to say goodbye
because we always seemed to cry
The blaring heat
--no relief.
A rented bedroom I don't even pay for
The smell of the store and freshly purchased paperback novels
A sense of loneliness
with some flirtatious emails
The soul that sees beautyMay sometimes walk aloneLoneliness adds felling of unwanted And expresses the pain of being alone
Dear Bully,
We haven't spoken much since middle school,
I'm sure you've noticed.
Or perhaps you haven't noticed.
The only thing that I am truly sure of is you used to notice me every day.
Buy into the aestheticI wouldn't spare you a dime
I am my own butcher
of my edifice
Not a single truth
nor a single lie
Could slow the ebbs in current
Could stop the rising tide
somedays i feel like there's nothing to live for
somedays i feel there's no need to move on
sometimes i wonder what's going to happen next
What's so bad in being a lonely star?
I know it's a rough start
But I've chosen this path
I'm a shiny star
In the middle of sameness
At least i have oneness
With the maker of my star
the far moon slightly chipped,
whispers so softly
bring me home, i plead
to sleep with me in
solitude
how can i reach the place i long for?
save me from loneliness
She didn't want it to stop
the way he made her
smile but I just thought it myself.
She's just a child,
he's not him any more and she's still growing,
he tried to tell her
I lay in the bed
My eyes swollen with tears
Completely restless
And drowning in fears.
I waded in the waters of nostalgia,
of heartbreak.
Dancing under the veil of midnight glamour,
the ghost of laughter admist unkept promises.
Silence,
fractured her,
Maybe sunsets remind me of you,
because I'm always left with the view of watching you fall,
each time for someone else.
Wilted leaves tumble past
Helplessly
In the sun-warmed air
I stare into the sky
Endlessly
Wondering what’s for me out there
There is an empty reality for men in this world.
Taking all they had.
The pastors, politicians, and bosses.
They remove a man's heart.
And they don't fill the spot with anything.
They just leave it.
Empty.
Once upon a time
A story reborn again and again
Stood a girl whose heart was empty
And eyes full of unshed tears
Her arms open to the darkness
watch me as I fade;
my friend.
I grow weaker everyday;
watch me as I cave;
my friend.
for now all, I know is pain.
watch me as I break;
my friend.
remember the opression and hate?
Something I like to remember when I need to cheer up
Is that I was not a part of the plan
I wasn't thought to be possible
I suppose the only truth i have found,
Is that nobody is in control of anything.
But a lot of people are good at pretending.
We choke the life out of our children.
We say things like, "you need an education"
the wavering tree
the rolling stone
the shaking plea
a place called home
a hopeless need
chilled to the bone
a want for warmth
and a shoulder to cry on.
to get out of the storm,
I heard your voice
over my morning alarm.
Then it was silence.
I picked myself
off of the hard wood floor,
Got dressed
Reached for the door
and felt you on its brassy doorknob.
There once was a lonely Giant
Who hated all others, he said
He would let no one live with him
He sought no-one’s company
Who hated all others, he said
I cried tears of color
I cried tears of blue
I cried tears of red;
and the color ran through
I cried tears of color
each a different hue
I cried tears of dread
as my mind thought of you.
Coming home to a quiet house
Lights are out
Lights are out
Eating dinner at an empty table
All alone
All alone
I am a wall.
No matter how hard you try
you can not break through this wall.
My emotions are cinder blocks
Please be safe.
Darling a life without you
is a life I don't even want to try to live.
But I will for a little while.
At least untill you retern.
My heart cries,
Peter Pan you took us away
The lost boys told us you wanted to play
They were tired and so was I
I had enough of you making me cry
You had us in your power
But some of the lost boys were as gentle as flowers
Dressed in green, I fly,
Through the stars, the sky,
Finding those like me, lonely,
Left by people who loved them not, lovely,
So we can be lonely boys togehter, lost boys,
A constricted heart,
A lonely cry,
The broken parts,
All want to die.
A lone tear,
Falls down my cheek,
Overwhelming fear,
Makes me weak.
I shake against my binds,
part of a new town
moving place to place
nowhere that i call home
not a single familar face
many people say " i'm home grown"
" haven't moved around at all"
well i've lived in every city
I am the human embodiment of fear and trepidation.
My body is a reeking cesspool of panic so I lie awake in bed like an earthworm lay on cement and
rot
Crying.
Constant tears.
Cruelty as far as the eye can see.
How come nobody helps me.
How can nobody see.
I’m in pain.
People are temporary
and when they go away it's scary
it's like a part of you dying
but half of you is still trying
to get back with them, get back to them
you're alone in the dark crying
My hand reaches out,
Yet, I couldn't touch what I wanted.
Is it because my goal is too high?
Am I not tall enough?
Was it too much to hope for,
Sometimes I want to feel
Things a great deal.
Other times I want to be
Completely empty and free.
There's something so poetic about watching everything crumble around you
How can destruction be so artistic, so beautiful?
Seeing everything you attempted to build just fall
It's gone in the matter of minutes
March 3, 2017:
This everlasting darkness has really taken its toll on me
I don't think I can control myself anymore
This is spiraling out of control
So fast that I can't even keep track of wherever I used to be
These Feelings are so hard to express
They bounce around in my head trying to get out.
Anger, haterd, sadness, loss,
But also love and care.
It feels like no one else can understand These Feelings
Every smile without you is an empty one.
Every laugh without you isn't worth it.
Every step without you is heavy.
Every breath without you hurts.
Every day without you is wasted.
Turn the splinters into dust underneath a white sky.
For centuries, I waited upon the one that can see pass the lies.
Now that I have them here and so very near,
The grips of my hands won't leave the shelter of my home.
I cannot leave.
There are chains,
I think.
My hands are bound behind my back.
Realization flips on completely,
But it does nothing to hinder the chains.
Resolve flickers off.
Why is it that I can sense a snake in the grass and will run in the opposite direction
but when I felt you inching closer and closer to me I watched you like a National Geographical special, a child mesmerized by the carnival rides
I am smart
but my brain is not my own
I am so alone
I am just a clone
playing follow the corrupt leader
I am smart
They say I am all bone
I tell them my guts length in meters
She’s the pretty girl with the perfect life .She plays sports and gets good grades.But one day, everything started to revolvearound a knife.
Beyond the seas of melancholy,
there was a time I held your hand,
My heart now bears an untold story...
like a ship at sea that longs for land-
A great untruth my lips have borrowed,
My world is empty
my world is full
my world is dark
and harsh but not cruel
my world is old
my world is new
my world is mine only
wish i could show it to you
my world is fast
People say they'll be there for you.
But when I cry all night,
What can you really do?
People say they won't leave.
But with what I know,
How can I believe?
I'm constantly struggling,
But i strive to become something better.
I'm constantly crying,
But i know i deserve so much better.
The music within me sings a song,
A song about a strong girl
alone
but no, i'm not lonely
down
but not depressed
look again
i enjoy the peace,silence and acceptence of being alone
no one to crack you open like a egg,
Last night I was dreaming a dream,
You were back by my side
I was happy, but had to wake up, and open the blinds
Sun pouring in illuminated the darkness in life
When the middle of the night comes,
bleak and lonely, my eyes open to find
the many shades of gray,
constantly echoing off of each other.
Thoughts racing back to that moment,
A step out.
A storm in.
A single drop of blood.
One of them, will win.Thundering blasts.
Compulsive fasts.
Murmurs inside.
The skin, opened wide. Sex, oh no, agony and hatefuck,
I’ve always feared being alone
Not the loneliness
Of being left home overnight
With the dog curled in your lap
Jumping at every small creak
Have you ever been so lonelyLost in the woodsBut terrified to turn backBecause you know where you came fromThe darkness is unbearableYet you hold yourself to the floorSayingDon’t give up…
The monsters of our mind Chasing usNever letting go
The demons of our soulCapturing usTaking us hostage
The ghosts of our heartAre just bits that remainAnd shadows of what was
written 08/07/16
The secrets we keep
Just words between us,
We carefully speak
Perfectly hushed.
But now I have questions
And we are never alone,
So I speak nothing
The air around was abundant
but i still felt as if i was suffocating,
streets flooded with nothing but it
i screamed "someone save me."
Like when you are parched for water
I am not alone,
I can feel their hands clutching at my heart,
Listening to it like the ticking of a time bomb,
5, 4, 3, 2, 1 ,
I love being alone,I hate being lonely.I wanna run awaybut I want you to hold me.You're a beautiful rosebut I'm afraid of your thornsI wanna open up to youbut I don't want your scorn.
When I look at my friends,
Do you know what I see?
People that have meant the world to me.
That was what I thought,
And even still slightly feel,
But how much of it is real?
This one is for the kids
with no more hope
No more purpose
Broken smiles
Shattered teeth
The kids who fall short of their dreams so closely
they scrape them with their fingertips
I’d try to find you in the stupidest places,
I’d be watching a movie and find you,
I could find you in the street lights,
or reflecting off the lake,
or in the smoke that pours out of my cigarette,
To be alone is not to be lonely
To be alone is not having anyone there physically
But there emotionally
To be lonely is something different
To be lonely is to have someone there physically
Have you ever felt alone?Like there's all these people around you at work or schoolSmiling and laughingWith their friendsAnd theirBest friends.
Heavy once again
Sorrow permanently
Permeating
Penetrating
Over and over
The insecurities
Stab like darts
Tears well up
Out of nowhere
Leaking and spilling
Pouring down
In unrelenting sheets
Washing all
In its path
Battle-worn soldiers
Pellets of water
That are cold to the touch
Leaving numb traces
And mingling
With salty tears
Where to go
What to do
I'm so confused
Heart aching
Torn in two
I always knew
Somewhere
Deep inside
This feeling
Of being lost
But knowing
And feeling
It's painful
That helps
Not really
To describe it
Seems a little
Silly
For me
Pain is
Your heart
I want
To throw it
Away sometimes
Because too often
Stretching on and on
For miles and miles
Everything pure white
And dull gray
And dirt brown
A path of gravel
Your footsteps echo
In the silence
By themselves
Nobody else
An ache in your chest
Dunno where we stand
Happy memories ablaze
Standing hand in hand
Where it all began
Nobody can say
The end was unexpected
A world fell apart
I don't think anyone understands how lonely and depressed I am.
I don't try to hurt myself in any way.
But I'm just so unhappy with life.
And it hurts to get up every day, acting like everything is ok.
Still feeling alone.Everyday. Every night.I got myself, but I'm wanting more.Wanting something different.Another person in my life.
Look here, Look there, Look everywhere
I can't stop thinking of what I do
Everytime, I overthink
It's not easy to over protect
to over analyze
to over guess
I'm tired of being afraid
I am something that many men seek
It doesn’t matter if you are young or antique
They chase and hunt through all the realms known
Only wanting to not be alone
I used to think it was normal
To cry for three hours about nothing.
That it was normal
To think about dying at least once a day.
I am numb to the words in my head all the time,
But I'm still feeling lost and lonely inside,
My friends can have fun and live their own lives,
While I'm stuck in the mirror feeling broken inside,
Tears falling by nite
Smiles rising by day
Wanting to express yourself, but not really knowing the way
Glass shattered, pain misunderstood
People telling you to change, because change is good
Grabbing the glistening hands of yours
Twirl of orchids fell above us
Your Blanche face glows
Precious as gold
May I know how it feels to hold?
You are not alone, but your mind makes you think that way.
What if you're actually alone,
Just not accepting of the fact?
Maybe. Maybe I am.
A note sounds
Harsh and beautiful
Light falls around a room
Dust floats in the air
A piano stands by the window
Her tears fell down her face
As she let her crown fall
He picked her up slowly
Knowing she no longer trusted him
He kept repeating sorry
But all she felt was the vibration of his lies
So alone.....
I lay here alone
Do you know what alone is?
No one to communicate with
No one there to hear you hear you
No one to cheer you up
so many emotions my body can't contain
continuously being suffocated like an un-oxygenated flame
if someone would put me out how grateful i would be
for my emotions--never ending--are shifting like the trees
How do I fill this void
I have tried distractions and diversions
But I am still a very sad person.
I try not to lose my writing passion
The boy stood at the edgeHe looked up and down, side to sideHe just wanted to end the fight the one he called his life
If an island ever daredTo be stranded with meI'd take my laptopAnd a coffee shopWith the wi-fi free
in a perfect world, the sky would be in a
perpetual state of beauty, the sun
always in set, the sky whirling
with pinks and purples of many shades,
the flowers always in bloom, creating an
I stand out in the cornfield, alone among strangers
Useless to the farmer who waters and feeds me
The plot of land I sit in, is shaded by the accomplishments of those around me
Proud is the farmer
You were gone for so long
Now you're back
Gone for too long
Eleven months and twenty three days to be exact
Oh how I missed you
Your cold touch
Your green skin
When it comes to what I need,
it starts with wood & some strings.
To create a sound,
unique frets,
techniques for each note,
creates a sound that just allows,
the siren of rock and roll.
Blind she stumbles through the façade
Everything perfect, now always flawed.
With open eyes, the illusion presents,
With lies and cheats it only makes sense.
“It's so much fun! It's so much fun!”
Said the deliriously happy red and white stripes, gliding up and down the flaps of the grand tent
“It’s so much fun! It's so much fun!”
the day everyone leaves my side is the day I die inside
with no one left could I survive on my own?
In the most extreme and dire conditions-
Whether it be marooned on the shores of a deserted island,
or standing along the fault
of mother nature’s disastrous earthquake crumbling,
All I need...
All I need isn't what you need.
All I need is what you have.
All I need is to be someone.
All I need is who you are:
You are funny,
You are beautiful,
You are smart,
I knew I had it bad,
when they asked what I would need
if I was stranded on a island,
and the first thing I thought of,
was your blue eyes instead of water.
Isn't that sad?
At night I feel you hold me,Whispering all the things you never told me.When I wake up you'll be goneBut for now, I dream on.
Lonely Love There is a burning Deep in my soul My heart is yearning Like a bells toll Far across the ocean waters Underneath the skies grasp Hidden behind hurricane shutters Through a shattered heart I rasp Tell me you want me For I cannot be wit
I've been robbed.
Robbed of all sources of light-
Robbed of the light of feelings of worthiness
robbed of the lights of dance
and laughter
robbed of the drive to seek out more lights-
Can't this all just be a dream? It'd like life's playing a cruel joke I just want you here with me No matter how bumpy the road
There are times
Times of happiness and times of joy. Moments that I feel like the sun.
But you can't look at the sun.
The sun
It shines so endlessly, affecting everyone it touches
Tap, tap, tap
Or rather, thud, thud, thud
Lub-dub, lub-dub
The throbbing beat in my chest
Uncontrollably echoing the chime of the unknown
Reminding me of what I have to lose
Now, as I look upon this empty room I am alone, but not quite lonely. Voices carry on, with no face. Footsteps with no person. What I have realized is. There is no one left. Everyone's gone. I'm alone. Again. But.
some lonely only child playing hide & seek alone tags her reflection and dances away... she's king of the hill with no one to rule, and ring around the rosie just leaves her dizzy & sick...
i'd like to find a lonely place to scream & not be heard...
a place where i can go to cry & not feel my tears absurd...
- 04/04/1996 12:21am - kenneth p rougeau jr
She tugs at her sleeves
hiding her cold, white hands.
With trembling lips,
she breathes.
Her soul compresses,
lungs collapse,
heart implodes.
Beautiful boys,
ugly scars,
Alone upon the wreckage,
Broken hearts on either side,
The dark distorted crater,
Where my last hope came and died.
The darkness all around me,
Not cut through by the light,
My solo isolation,
On the outside you see
A girl who’s fearless as if nothing could break her
But in reality
This girl looks back and sees her life as a blur
She’s broken and torn, mentally bruised and beaten
For goodness sake
I am the quiet girl in the back of the class
No one notices me they just go past
I am invisible and broken
But no one will ever know
When you miss that boy
And your nights are derived of joy
Do you ever stare at the stars
And wonder where you are?
What you are doing here
With a heart and mind so unclear
And a Destiny destroyed by work
Growing up sucks in this world
Having pressures to be perfect
You try to get away from it
Clear your mind and run away
But you still have that voice
The one in the back of your head
Some days I'm on a ship in the clouds
A captain of a ghost ship
Nicknamed the Lone Wolf of the Stars
I feel invincible being alone in the starry sky
A knight in the night sky
Please don't stop me, my love, let me lie down and kiss the ground,
let me taste the taste of freedom on my tongue and remember my
Now that the darkness is gone
You're coming back to me
You kept me in prison
But now you're setting me free
Eyes made of ice,
And a heart made of stone.
Everybody hates her,
She knows she's alone.
All she wishes for,
Is a single friend who cares.
One who comforts her,
"More, more" they say, "More, more."
These voices won't stop.
This emptiness won't be filled enough.
"More, more." These voices continue to say, "More, more."
More of what?
More friends.
More money.
Leave, go out of me
You’re the thing that kills me
You let all my friends see
And then they leave
I feel alone
Don’t wanna go home
No one answers their phone
All my friends seem pretend
This is the end
I spend yet another night, jonsing for a kiss only you can give me, longing to be held only in your arms, wanting to cling onto you and lay down in our blissful silence, saying so much but at the same time, not much at all.
I think you all know this,
To God we do belong,
To him we depend,
Let him be your friend,
For he is always there for you.
Depression and I have been dating each other for five years. Depression was a lover that would convince me to bed earlier than anyone ever should. Depression kissed me on the first date, and I haven’t shaken my lover since.
The world is a place full of people
they are everywhere, covering every inch of the earth
What is it to be the one
Who watches their world fall apart before their eyes?
What is it to be innocent
as the ones you love break the walls
and often... -themselves upon them?
you have flowers and bees
then water feeds trees
even an ostrich would warn a zebra of danger
why doesn’t anyone’s mind work with mine?
a mom and her daughter will speak in unison
Please tell me it was I who made you leave
I do not want to believe that you meant to walk away
I want to blame myself
The stoner rolls up his weed. As he licks the blunt it hits him harder than before... he's a loner. No ones around to marvel his perfect roll game. No one is around to call him by his name.
I miss you.
I miss the way our snugged faces touched, our eyesight would soften.
"Look me in my eyes and tell me you don't want this to end."
Nothing is more lonely than unwelcome company
Foot-in-the-door
Talk-and-spit
Choke on that flat but fierce foreign language
What are you talking about?
Sounds so cruel and base
Humpty Dumpty fell off a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
And all the kings horses and all the kings men
tried in vain to mend Humpty's suffering head
To no avail it came though
They say
that insanity is repeating the same thing and expecting different results
that if you're crazy, they'll lock you away
and more
among other cliches
they say
I’m mental.
I’m losing what’s left of my rapidly
deteriorating mind.
Its hard to understand a basket
case.
No one really does.
I've been searching for hours,
to find a reason why.
It's 2 A.M.
and I'm running circles in my mind.
I whisper prayers
that go unheard.
I wonder when
my thoughts will turn.
To happy days
Don't fight me cause I'm noone.I'm the face u see when u look n the mirror.I'm the light that shines to the darkness but yet im noone.I'm something to someone but noone to myself.I'm
she barely drank the poison, barely tasted it at all.
she walked home a little dizzy, suprised she didnt fall.
she snuck through her window, afraid to just walk in the door.
I am one person
In this world
Nobody to play with
Nobody to talk to
Nobody to look at
How Can I Smile?
If there's no one
In this world to be with
I am all alone
The hallways and lockers all look the same
But it seems each different person all seem so vain
Each day and class was the same ole norm
The teacher with the short brown hair was such a bore
As the days pass by,
I feel my heart slowly breaking,crashing,spinning.
It's all coming back.
No one cares.
My voice means nothing anymore.
I'm just the girl on the outside.
The picture of myself is thus:
fading, losing color, changed from smile to frown,
gazing back my eyes, alien, hurt.
Why as I lay here I feel stress?
Why as I walk through the halls I feel lonely?
Why as I sit here at my desk I feel the urge to cry?
Why as I look at myself I make a list of things to change?
Maybe at times i did things that hurt, but i tried so hard that you will always see
That having you was a blessing for you and me.
Imagine the time that you used to be able to remember.
You have to imagine,
because you can no longer grasp that memory.
The feeling of something almost there,
torments you.
I feel it every day
Breathing on my neck
I felt it yesterday
When I felt like a wreck
It's all around me
Inside and Out
Is anyone there to see
Or here me shout
It's a big world for sure.
There's no doubt about that
And honestly, that's ok.
Except for my loneliness.
What with the world being so big.
Who is that lonely girl
Sitting on the corner of the street
Who is that lonely girl
Not saying a word while she eats
Who is that lonely girl
Wearing the outdated shoes
Who is that lonely girl
You feel like your alone in a cruel place, wanting to leave you'll do whatever it takes, but at the end of the day, you know it's inevitable, that your basically alone in this world; invisib
It’s late, and I’m coming down with a cold,
Or something of the sort.
I should be sleeping,
But I’m not ready
And yet, I don’t want to be awake either.
Can I just stop existing for a little while?
Have you ever thought about the possibility that one day the Earth will have no more food?
Chuan de, river blossom's day, Tian, Hua
Fu rong chu shui, like day rissen from night, hei ye
ni, and i, stand over rui, see those flowers hua cao?
Wo kan, say i, why ta bu shuo? dark, night ta shi...
Never had a shoulder to cry on
Rely on, or grow cold when I'm gone
It's only been myself lost in the thought of love
I left the lights on when I left this morning
The rain was pouring down
On this boring town
Your amazing its true but I need more from you. Show me you as much as I do. Give the affection that I give. And when I need you, hold me tight and never let me loose. But none of these things have you been able to accomplish.
May 15th
Nothing can change my love for you.
Everything just happened so fast.
I wonder, what if I knew,
before you became our past
just who you were?
I am a shadow. I am a spore. I am a seed.
I have not grown yet, but among my millions of siblings, I don't think I'll stand out much.
Lonely
The one feeling out of so many that I truly understand.
Lonely
What you've still felt like after the bottle was empty.
Lonely
The one thing that you wouldn't want for anybody is what you've become.
I Am A Shooting Star
Once You See Me I Amaze You
But By Time You See Me, Im Already Gone
My Existence Has Already Been No Longer
Dead To The Outside, But Alive In Your Mind
At night, I wait for her to come,
My rays glistening silver on the pool below.
The forest is quite and still;
The stars wheel and dance around me.
At night, I come to the pool in the forest;
i guess i knew i would shatter
if i let myself fall for you as hard as i did.
but i did not expect microscopic shards of myself
to fly through the atmosphere and land miles apart.
I AM STUCK IN A MAZE THERE IS NO WAY OUT,
I FELT THE LONELINESS DRIVING ME INSANE,
I RAN IN BETWEEN STONE COLD WALLS THAT NEARLY REACHED CLOUDS,
STOPPING TO CATCH MY BREATHE IN FRONT OF ME WAS A FLOWER,
I Wish
I wake up and dress my face up in camoflague to protect me
My true values bottled up from my adversaries
Skeptical whether not to expand my horizons
I don't know why I do it
Degrading myself for others to walk over me
Doing what they want to make me small
I let them
To make sure I can still feel
If I didn't let it happen,
Look at me crumbleWatch me fallI’m doing my bestI’m giving my allBut nothing worksIt falls apartNo matter whatI have to restartIm growing tiredI want this to end
What if on a night we have a dream
Not the ones of make believe
We capture nothing on this night
Our darkness submerged in our night
What if we could not make a sound
We find it true we met the ground
Symbols never die...
Their meaning never fades,
Meanings though, change
But they still stay
Everything stands for something,
Yet I don't know what I truly stand for
Bravery, Courage, Truth
How can I face the world
When monsters roam 'round?
This world is so blurry,
And I'm making no sound.
These monsters are huge
Much greater than I
But as I stand scared
A single seashell on the beach
Waves overwhelm its speech
A single tile to the mosaic of the shore
Listening to the ocean roar
The waves beat against the coast
What do you do mornings?
Do you bramble‑chase skirts
or fly kites
or seek something
I can't begin to imagine?
I've wondered...
watching music fill my room,
Half a day past morning
with nowhere to go
but on.
I turn away
from the thought of you
somewhere,
this moment,
moving along avenues
Today is...
the long slow ache
of missing someone you love
and knowing
there is no way
to retrace your steps...
of standing in small
empty spaces
i made it a day without you and looks where its got me
I'm covered in filth and there's no one to stop me
The Words of a Lonely One
The words you so often hear
"Be strong, be confident"
They don't mean anything to the lonely ones
Drip, Drop, Drip... The rain hits the window
Drip, Drop, Drip... The facet leaks agaisnt the cold basin
Drip, Drop, Drip... Her blood in her head pounds
Drip,Drop,Drip... She falls to the floor
Death, the end to all beginnings and the beginning of some unknown extent.
Death, the answer to all problems that arise out of life as they never seem to end.
I mold the perfect skin, the impenetrable shield.
I break mirrors to conceal the lies from myself.
I shake hands and kiss cheeks, smile and "say cheese"
Never worried that my mask will crack, it's applied to a T.
So long, she's spent hiding, behind her velvet mask.
Hiding herself from the judging eyes,
Pretending to be someone, anyone else.
She smiles, while everyone stares intently.
In the end
What will happen when the world ends?
We ponder on the past
What about the future?
We judge by what is apparent
What does that say about us?
You're dropping "I'm sorry" like I'm still around.I don't care how you feel. I don't care about your excuses.You took for granted all the times I never let you down.
The condensation of expelled expressed emotion swirling my window pane.
Making the portal to another dimension shift ajar, to one which is much more comfortable.
In the eyes of another,
who’s there by the sill,
quietly sitting,
perfectly still.
Eyes that are clouded,
I lie in bed, drowning in its white sheets and feeling trapped by the dull grey walls that surround this oddly shaped room. I notice every imperfection this awful place holds. The cracks in the ceiling as deep as a canyon.
Your not real to me, your just a dream
without a tear i can think of you no more
your slipping away
why won't you stay?
your happy now-with her
im just in the way
your always on my mind
They are all starting to evolve
to become happy and involved
i have been left before
but never have i thought by them
they don't even know
but this distance is beginning to grow
This.
Life, it isn't right.
It's difficult and messy,
Don't want to count my blessings,
but I know that I have them.
Sometimes though,
I feel alone.
Slowy swirling around on my own.
The song of my soul is playing,
The beat entrapping me, surrounding me
Lifting me up at all times,
So why is your shroud still here?
No matter how far I run,
I could even fly away,
Follow me into the depths if you can withstand the shark,
This world placed spite in my heart,
I’m bothered by light,
So I’m comfortable in the dark,
Individualistic by character,
They watch over me
Every step, every sound, every move
Then they ignore me
Not a word, not a glance, not a worry
I want to be free
I want to go out on my own
I used to sit alone in bed and cry.
As tears streamed down my face I wondered when I'd find my place.
I'd think to myself "why do I even try?".
Days and nights passed and it was all the same.
In a sea of people,
In a crowd of friends,
Too busy to notice
Where am I?
I am alone.
Alone,
In a sea of people,
In a crowd of friends.
If happiness is success in life,
then what is dying?
Everyone's hyped up on the thrill of life;
few are ready to go.
And when they do, who's prepared?
Even the one's who've expected it
"Of course I'm fine."
'Please help me.'
"Don't worry I'm already over it."
'It hurts too much to talk about, don't you see?'
"I'm gonna be busy."
'I want to be alone.'
"Sounds like fun."
I sit here quietly
And my eyes go dead again
And I am in this house too much
And hold on a minute because I'm drowning
And nevermind I'm fine I just needed
A snatch of music
A lyric to embroider
I am only a girl,a girl with a heartand a soul made of glass.
A girl who walks alone,keeping to herself.I am just a mysteryto the world passing by.
its in my lonely
that I realize how I am frail and boney
how harsh I am to me,how my heart is stony
it is in my lonely
that I confront my phony
masks get dropped and the acting gets chopped
Do you really love her?
Do you really care?
I could love her better.
Why are you even there?
I care about her as a person,
I don't just love her booty!
I'm holding into this string
This string is an unstable cable
shaky and weak
This string is tangled,
and ruined, and soon it will wither and break
It's no longer strong for the years have made it weary.
In a dream I was surrounded by darkness
It was a cold vast emptiness
The creeping feeling of things at my feet
In this void emptiness consuming me
I felt the pain in my legs
a numbing and painful bleeding
I stand at the edge of my cliff
Soft grass carressing my skin
As I stare at the crashing waves against the harsh cliff
Sun dazzling of the crest of hundreds of waves
A beautiful last scene
To hold in my mind
I remember that night
It was bitter and cold...
The light had extinguished,
as if the sun had ceased to burn.
The darkness moved to surround me
Encircling my flesh and piercing my skin.
Distant drums are beating.
War is on her way.
I once wished for peace,
once prayed to the
almighty Lord for
a sort of sanity in mad times.
The stars fall when she awakes
Another day of saddness and failure she feels alone Fake a smile like all is well she's far gone and no one can tell
Have you ever looked around and ask yourself '' What am I do here?'' , you stand still, feel the air, hear the words, and you just wish
No compassion,
And an influx of natural disasters.
That's what you are.
Our interaction are still not mutual,
I looked around for you until I could no longer see,
Then I realized that this loneliness would forever be apart of me.
The sickening trials of love and connection.
For what is a heart
if it is not brave?
What is it for
if not for feeling
the courage
to invite
every stranger
into Its home
To
Back then everything was so vivid,
I could remenber her face even though she had left.
The image was so clear,
its almost as if she stayed.
But now, only 5 years have passed
It would be so sweet
If the gaze of those darling eyes were fixed on me,
Tantalized – simply mesmerized by what you see
Or if the curves of your lips - urged by my fingertips
And provoked by my eagerness
One
I walk above the earth among the stars
A mysterious man lifts the enormous weight off of my shoulders
He seduces me with sweet whispered words
Could this be love?
Two
I have these thoughts I don't understand.
They come from a place I don't quite know.
Often at times I sit alone.
I write poetry.
Words in a page.
My thoughts,
My passions,
My life.
I write to connect with those who are like me.
Misunderstood,
Lost,
Powerless.
Apart
And awake
We lie
Thousands
Of miles away
Thoughts crossing paths sooner than our physical bodies will be
criss crossing limbs
Hands smearing body oils
Stand.
Even if you’re weeping.
Even if you’re blind.
Even if you have collapsed so many times before.
Stand.
Find someone to lean on.
Someone whose smile has set off fireworks in your chest.
If only you knew how much i needed a friend / i thought i gave you a hint when you saw a cut under my chin/ and you saw hate marks on my arm or when/ i use to laugh and tears would come out i would say your killing me ,but deep down like a din s
You know what makes me happy, I like laughter and people lauging, at funny jokes I tell my friends happily, when life goes wrong, we are again laughing, for life without joy is quite sappy.
what is it?
it seems quiet, like a whisper
what is it?
but it's loud, like a scream
what is it?
its hidden in the dark, like clothes in a closet
what is it?
Sometimes I wonder if they can even see me
Sometimes I wonder if they can the even hear me
Sometimes I wonder if they even notice me
Sometimes I wonder if they even know my name
People ask who I was, who I am, who I used to be,
I wonder why ask something so stupid, so silly?
Who I am is hidden behind pain and mistrust,
for me its not easy to just give it up.
It had threatened me.
And with every ounce of it I loved.
It had hurt me so many times,
and I ordered it to continue.
Becoming so accustomed to it,
turned into my addiction.
Everyone is always trying to rush to the end
just to feel good about the win.
But what awaits for you as you stand in the line of people who want the same things as you?
When you read my words
maybe you’ll feel my happiness
and you’ll remember the night
when we talked for hours
with no curfew to stop us.
It was lovely,
but you weren’t really there.
-
In the hallways of school, surrounded by unfamilair faces. Feeling alone, and as I walk through the lonely hallway, the only person I can find a friend in is myself.
I know well enough
That I am not alone
But nevertheless my resolve is to never give up my secret
For if ever I did I would certainly be stoned
Or forced to pack up and leave their home
To show my own soul
Left with a broken smile,
A twisted girls mind
Can take you a mile
Through the decisions she's made
She's haunted by pain
Brought to light to see
The only good decision she ever made
Taking a trip through the French 25
to drinking Bourbon down the street
to rowing her boat on canal
but yet life ain't even a dream
for Easy Erica the sex fiend.
Born in the Big Easy
She looks at the moon
She starts to sing a tune
a dream she had this afternoon
In the desert she would roam
Looking for a place called Home
Were that is she doesn't know
Here I am
Every night
Thinking of you
My body lingers for your touch
My lips crave for your kiss
But all that stops
Now that I see
That we just aren't meant to be
Arriving at this place filled with fear and competition
Feeling inept, inadequate, unfit and incapable
I hid behind my worries, my scares and even me, bare
I didn't like me, embarrassed, couldn't handle a stare
There I walking solitude
Alone, inconspicuous and free
Of shadow where I walk passed everyday
I'm very confined in my own mind
Wandering upon reality
I move through the halls with barely a glance.
People won't talk to me, won't give me a chance.
They hardly notice if my appearance I enhance.
I am not a ghost.
I spend most of the day inside my head,
Have you ever felt like you're in the shadows waiting for your time to shine?
Have you ever felt like you're tumbling over, caught on the borderline?
Broken heart
Lonely soul
Bored mind
Hard to find
A creative escape
A mind's way to encapsulate
A beloved place's flaws
The creative cup's straw
to better sample the iced tea
as I lay Prints,
forward; the distance
as I drift,
lone wolf,
Alone.
Alone is how I feel when there's no one near, alone is how I hate to be.
And when there's tears coming down and my smile is upside down, I hate that it's just me.
A monkey is in a tree
by the ocean
by the sea
In a tree all on its own
Free to roam
And inhale the ocean breeze
Listen, have you heard?
No.
when I speak to think I'm the center of attention is absurd.
Every week; a rise in tension because they terroize this nerd,
I once had someone tell me that if you're lying awake at four am you're either in love or lonely, and let me tell you that's not the case because as I lie here all I can feel is the poison you've created coursing through my veins.
I sit in the dark and listen to the sound of laughter and joy but more importantly
I hear the LOVE they have with each other.
It's weird being lonely,
All you see is the dark,
I just want one to hold my hand,
I don't care what they are,
I am the glass vase you forgot to fill
With flowers last week. So let me be cold,
Let me be beautiful. Let me be clear.
I am the drawer you left open in your
Rush out the door. So let me be misplaced,
When I’m lonely in a world of my own, I often think of you. I imagine the way you hair never fell into the right place and how that was my absolute favorite thing about you.
My friends don't want me
Life is getting hard
I'm feeling so lost
And it's tearing me apart
There is no one to turn to
Nobody cares
It's making me retreat
You broke my heart when you sai goodbye
You made me cutt and want to die
You told me you love me and that you cared
You even got me a cute teady bear
I gave you my heart
And you tore it apart
i look at this blank page; or
I I try to see bend the words
Flowing from my own pen
I look and I won't see the the truth in the words I write-
I will look and I won't see that my mind is in a fight
I thought of you when I was lonely.
I smiled at your picture in my mind.
I laughed with you and we shared our vented feelings-
our Joys, our Sorrows, our Angers.
AS darkness takes over
my plea is to be free,
but all it does
is take over me.
I hope for a candle,
but no, it's to bright.
so instead,
I search for the right.
You are in my darkness,
You held me
You held me when I was strong
You held me
You looked at my face and told me how beautiful my smile was
Everyday I wonder why
Everyday I look into your eyes
I see what I don't want to be
Everyday I picture a dream in my head
One so profound I feel as if it can never be crushed
I fell in love with you so fast
It started to make you think of your past
All the terrible words he said
The things that your ex put in your head
I tried to make you as happy as you could be
I look around but see no one,At least no one that I have knownFor here in this forgotten world
Shoot me up, I'm feeling empty
Give me a shot, a dose of feeling
Thirty pain-givers are all I'm needing
To give rhythm to this pointless beating
She said "Time crawls but we still get older
narcotics and razors
cannot block these bullets
that explode through my chest
every time i think of
our last kiss
I am not depressed
I can still talk to people
And smile at the beauty in the world
Laugh at funny jokes
Laughter
I will always have laughter
Although there are times
For I once counted Daffodils in my sleep,
So delicate and unique.
But no more can I sleep,
For the devil has a hold of me oh so deep.
For I once counted Daffodils in my sleep,
So delicate and unique.
Separation based on location
too far to reach
too far to go
not close enough to home
I can see you
I can hear
but I cannot reach out and feel you
'cause separation based on loaction is a thing
I had met with an angel.
Here's what he had said:
Love me forever, and it costs but one small thing
a life, fleeting
a soul-less little thing
your soul I ask to bring.
I had met with that angel
Every day,
I fake a smile,
I look at the world through dead eyes,
I slice up my wrists,
And I bruise my thighs,
They beckon to me,
The colorful pills,
The nylon rope,
The loaded gun,
Gone gone gone away
ran ran ran away from here
away from here
darling i know you are afraid
but please please try to stay
stay here
your Childs right here and she says she said she loves you
Why is it that when you lose a love your heart breaks,
if love is just a chemical addiction produced by our brains?
Why does it feel like your thoracic cavity is hollow,
A stranger...
A feeling...
True or not
Days, Months, Years...
Friends, Best friends, lovers...
One day, eyes are on her
Slowly Slowly dissapear infront...
of my eyes...
Some will never know the joy but only the end
they'll never see the light when the light has dimmed
room spinning
eyes watering
cheeks flushing
lips quivering
heart burning
lungs ghasping
just an average night
alone in the dark
Im at a loss for words right now
I don't know what to say
I don't know how to feel or how
to go about my day
The images never leave my head
Your happiness displayed
There was once a time for men like me,
Now I am sitting on a lonely oak bench,
outside a gothic cathedral,
We not together but I love what we got but I can tell the vibe is gone when the text messages start getting short and the phone calls stop being long
Don't judge those people,
They all have their own stories.
Why can't you hear them?
Look at their faces,
Are they sad beneath their smiles?
Listen to their thoughts.
as it swayed in soft circles dangling upside down from my ceiling fan, i watched through tears as the carnations wilted white petals penetrated the darkness of my room.
Whispering smiles indent my thoughts as I walk through the halls.
Overthinking what's past and what's present has been known to ruin me.
Every move I make causes my conscience to stutter.
It’s still so hard
To just wake up
Each and every day.
It’s hard to know
A simple life can
Make me feel this way.
I’ll put on a face
I’ll make believe.
Somehow I’ll be okay,
To the one with unbearable anxieties and sorrows,
Holding you back from living and breathing towards tomorrow
Believing that the light of hope on your Savior's shoulders
Will fail to reach you in time
the faggot in the reflection of my space helmet visor is my only friend.
with shaggy shorn hair and big eyes and a hollow cheek bone that holds in my silent tongue.
i have etched lessons in my skin, leaving silver lines
I cause pain
I cause distress
Take me out.
I cause heartache
And I cause stress
Take me out.
I fell asleep
And hoped I never would wake up
Take me out.
Lonesome softly pounds
Whispers sweet sounds
Waits until day it ends
Paces and it depends
It asks for me to wait
Afraid I decide my fate
And I never make a change
Alone we never do gain
She awoke to hear him bid good morning
She slept to hear him say good night
But as the tide rolled in and washed him away
She faded into the darkness today
And time it screeched and cried
If I could change one thing,
Just one little thing in the world,
I would tell the lonely the speak up
and shout out what they have to say.
We quiet ones aren't deserving to be outspoken,
People say mean things
they say I'm not good enough
say I'm ugly or dumb
sometimes they are right
sometimes I am dumb enough to listen to the hateful words
The girl walks down the long hall.
She keeps her eyes trained on the ground as she feels their stares burning holes through her.
They look her up and down, judging her face, judging her clothing.
“Depression”
I’m tired of wearing the painted grin
That mocks me and all of my sin.
The pain of my soul and my mind
You say that I've changed
but you're the reason i'm so cold.
Get out of my head,
the fights quickly get old.
You've made me so heartless
something I knew nothing of.
Once you broke my heart,
Isolate yourself
then ask why you're so lonely.
Tell you how I think,
now I feel like a phony.
These poisons were shared
over and over before,
between you and I,
this darkness we tore.
Is it the crickets' chirp
after the whole world has quieted
That fills my heart with emptiness?
Or is it the nights spent alone
Under these cold covers?
Perhaps its the memories of once
Belonging
One time, i wrote a poem
On a piece of paper with
No lines.
And i cried,
Smudging all the little letters.
The ants drowned by
Saltwater.
They thrashed and thrashed and thrashed,
Sick.
Sick of pulling that mask on again today.
Sick of playing the part of the girl they expect to see.
Tired.
Tired of trying so hard to find the right way.
The quiet darkness that
slipped in through the tiniest
slits and sat
growing and festering,
Has all but swallowed me whole.
Thick black curtains sequestering
the light with in my soul.
Such a beautiful soul
Flying free
Soaring over mountains
Limitless as can be
No one can bring her down
Such a beautiful soul
Flying free
Soaring over mountains
Limitless as can be
No one can bring her down
I dream in black and whiteI bleed the color of your eyes
All I can see is your lipsGently glazing over mine
As the sun setI saw my rose petals in the flame
She stares out the window
Content as can be
In her long raven locks
A flower is propped.
Paint Stains her olive hands
She seems to care less
As they lay on her dress
If I could change one thing, it’d be this tall, intimidating fence.
I’d tear it down and frolic away deliriously into the world that’s been waiting for me.
You were taken too soon my friend
And I sit here and wonder
Why your life had to end
Like the rolling of thunder
My one regret is not responding
In the month of November
The people squirming
Through each other
Sprinting
Pacing
Chuckling
Weeping
Briefcases in hand
Lunging
For the office
Laptops
Cellphones
Watches
Files
drifting through time
with no one to be
why cant anybody see me?
i do my best
for all to see
but no one
notices me
im in all the plays
and all the pictures
Days,
Weeks,
Months,
They pass.
And I wait.
I wait on you.
I wait on a FaceTime,
A call,
Some word.
But you don't call.
You don't FaceTime,
You send no word.
Surrounded
need space
To breath
Suffocating
looking
for help
and no one,
no one
notices
Do I matter?
Guess not
Why not?
Falls
Tars fall
Lonely,
I can't remember reading the definition.
An emotion that I,I've felt in constant repetition.
My defense mechanism fits the repulsed
credentials of the God above.
thoughts
lonely thoughts
sad atmosphere
drowing in everyones tears including mine
i could feel depressions presence
wondering if ill ever end up like them
this house will not feel safe anymore
The Dark that cones, the dark that rises. The darkness that is the light, in all my wrong doing. If you protect me from myself, your protecting me from THE DARKNESS.
I can't tell the difference between my dreams and reality anymore
Everyday I wake up and yet I'm never really here
I find myself living within the parallels of a world that loved me unconditionally
They call themselves boyfriends,But are they really?Yes, they’ve asked you out.Some don’t even do that.They message you dailyWorry about you every secondIf you don’t answer,They might even get mad
I need faith,
for i am faithless,
the demons in my dreams.
the darkness in my heart,
there is no light in my heart.
what i don't understand,
Love you "say" but its not true.
Its just another word for "forget you"
Told me you love me, told me you cared. But why arent you standing here?
You made it up didnt you? just to fill in the blank.
I'm okay even though my world is falling down,
Even if I've grown up in some forgotten town.
I'm okay even though my skin is full of spots,
Even if I'm way too big to think about cute tops.
It's strange. I feel so detatched from this.From these people. A part of me is afraid that I don't belong here.Like I'm not one of them. I feel...a lot. But somedays....
No this isn't. I feel held back. Empty in ways.I am my own worst enemy. How do I fix that?My success is written...and I have no choice.No power. No control. But I do...
We all deal with monsters,
Monsters in our heads,
Monsters in our bodies.
Depression, Scizophrenia,
Rymitoid, CRPS.
The monsters kill us,
Inside and out,
To the point of no return,
Broken pieces
Shattered heart
My life just seems to fall apart
But there's nothing that I can do
Hiding what's inside
showing what's not really there and
Leaving behind my feelings for you
THE HARDEST TIME OF MY LIFE
Everybody try to understand
But I didn’t want you to
I don’t think you can comprehend
I don’t understand why it is so hard
For you to suck up your ego for 2 seconds
and let your guard down
You see I need some answers
because the pain is back.
It isn’t pulsating and waking me at 2:43 am
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Theres noone in this world,
Id rather be with than you,
Counting the petals,
I love you, i love you not,
Counting and counting,
Connecting the dots,
The man I love is back home
Guys are plentiful around here
I can have them all I want
But they’re not him
They Stand Tall, Higher Than The Sky,
I Know They Could Kill Me, But I Continue To Fight.
I stare at the mirror.
Ugly!
I blink back tears.
Fat!
I know it's not true.
Don't I?
I look fine.
Hidden under clothes!
People think I'm cute.
They pity you!
Like a breath of cold air, i am lonely with fear,this pain i feel ,i just can't bear,it is painful enough to kill,ones fragile heart,Like a breath of cold air,to repair the heart,that was taken apart,by one careless words,by me taking out this bla
He'll tell you he loves you.
He'll talk real sweet.
You'll think he loves you.
You're just a piece of meat.
First, there's denial.
He wouldn't do that.
He cared about me once.
Alone is one of the worst things to be
When all you feel
Is tired and empty.
You can cry
You can weep.
You can shut off the light
And beg for sleep.
But it won’t come
And you’ll still be
In my short 16 years of life I've put myself into some crazy situations.
when it breaks it doesn't make a sound
there is no indication of its condition
it just gives in, falling prey
to the repetitive oppression
of day after day after day.
Foggy nights, starless sky
Restless fights, love undignified
They belong without a doubt
But too cowardice to work it out
Shameful love, it truly is
Poor life, poor family, poor kids
Little teacher in the front
I wish I could say what I want
Like how I’m tired from the night before
From all the things I’m expected to endure
Tossing, turning, sleep-deprived
Everything’s okay, mommy lied
I'm not sure what is worse
falling out of love
or realizing that there's nothing left
I wouldn't wish it on anyone,
no not even my worst
theres too much involved to
easily forget
She looks in the mirror who she sees is not who she is.
aviator shades
cookie cutter heartbreaks
petty girls
pretty girls and
superficial fakes.
I've been tring to figure out
what it is that makes
their worlds go round
I light a cigarette again
staring at your pillow where you're supposed to be sleeping
instead you're gone and smoke surrounds me
i'm breathing.
I know, I know that I'm never right
you told me.
im breaking.
listen to me
crumbling like stones.
i'm falling.
through the cracks,
i dont wanna be alone.
I feel it on the inside. I feel it in my soul. I feel this certain something that makes my body whole.
Girl in Blue wading in golden grain so tall it tickles her palms as she strides toward a nearby spruce.
She breathed in the air fresh from a recent rain.
I met a girl
and she was blue.
I met a boy
and his daddy took away all his fancy toys.
I met a mother
The beauty of lifeEven through this strifeIs people’s abilitytheir uncanny adaptabilityTo hold in their palmthat one simple objectobject of calmThe ability to affect
Thoughts are flowing in my head continously and confused.Is he even aware that I'm here?A smile he gives me in the hallway comes and goes.He talks with other girls the same way too.
I feel nothing. The world is nothing to me. I take steps, never feeling the ground below me. I touch hands, never feeling the electric energy flowing through our meeting. I speak words, that make no noise. I hear sounds, that have no volume.
Everywhere I turn silence greets me
If there is one thing I yearn for it is a face
Something other than the embrace
Of solace, because her mockery is deafening
Through the recent everythings
I’ve come to see
The things I planned turned to nothings.
I cannot be me
In a fairytale ending
Tears are streaming down his eyesUnder the desk lays a broken boyEmptiness contains an empty roomNobody asks the question why Under the desk lies the broken boyHe screams in pain
I haven’t met that guy that’ll turn my life around
Show me the light with every gentle caress
That has a smile that can warm a million cold hearts
The laughter of sweet innocence and happiness
Carry the One. carry,.. drag.. discard!
-futile. GRIPPING my face, Clawing me back..
My affliction.
my burden. MY BURDEN. carry, drag.
Lost within my own
We think we're alone,
Accompanied by nothing but,
Pains that linger,
aching from toe to finger,
Breaking apart our hearts and souls,
Making us lose all control,
But stop!
I wanna run away
Away from all the hurt and pain
Painful mistakes and irony misplaced
Crying................
That is all I know
Stop! Drop! And Roll! No, that doesn't work for me. I drop, bundle and fall as other start to kick me.Their shoes scratch my head and leave marks on my arms. I dress myelf in long sleeves so that no one can see my harms.
No one understands the pain that I go through,
they say it's just a phase, something we all do,
but I'm not part of "all" I'm unique and set apart
by the things that define me, my actions and my heart.
If,
I had only awakened only to see the one
I have been so desperately and passionately
Been waiting to embrace,
To let known as it has always seen
Not as it has always been perceived
I was 13.
Looking in the mirror,
It never dawned to me why,
Why the window between my teeth,
The disproportionate nose,
The “five-head”,
Too sufficient for just a bang,
Not brown
Soon flowers will growin the deepest and saddest partsof you and you'll bloom
You will always have people in your life that test you
There will always be people there to knock you down
It may seem that all the negative people are stuck to you like glue
It's the absence of warmth.The familiarity of a hand upon your shoulder.It's departure leaving all but an imprint.
I know you think about situations and say,
"That would never be me." You say
I could never be that girl that's acting all fast as if she has no home training" or
Old friend I see your back
my heart was not ready for attack
I was happy or a moment
I am slow to learn
happiness never lasts
I don't know why I am surprised
It obvious just from my past
Close ur eyes go under luke warm water an stay there for 5 minutes
thats how life was for me
'picture a darkness that is trying to take over
think of trying to scream
i cant hear
Wrote this in the wee hours of the morning, sort of in a trance like state.
It is you that I am missing.
All of your hugs, as well as your kissing.
We were once so tight, so close,
The new distance between us binds me in ropes.
The love is still there, I hope you know,
There's a quiet thunderstorm inside my head,
the thoughts strike across my brain,
neurons illuminate with light, transmitting more than what is visible by sight.
There's a quiet thunderstorm inside my head.
Soft light falls through the trees
Falls like the last leaves of autumn
Blowing in the breeze
And here I am missing you
Missing you
Tell me, do you miss me too?
All my life I've felt alone, forgotten, unnoticed
Yes I have my family but their love only goes so far
To be loved truly and wholely by another, is but a dream for me
I've always been alone
Walking on a thin line
Passing the warning sign
Where did I go wrong
On this road so long?
Walking down this cold road
With a tired and lonely soul
Oh, when did it come to this
Usually a book is read page by page and the words just fly by.
We could go back and re-read your whole story.
Just set aside some time.
But there's no time left to review.
What could I have said to save you?
Thoughts are racing through her mind
When you ask her if she's all right
All she says is, "I'm fine"
You shake your head and reply, "okay"
The silence echoes in your brain
Do not say goodbye, please hear me out first;
I love you, and know that I’m on your side
You say it’s done and it couldn’t get worse
While you reflect on the tears you have cried.
Writing all of my feelings
Will relieve me from all these teasings
That will make me jealous in life.
I just wanted a better life,
But yet, I won't be anybody's wife
They judge before they get to know me, they see an alien not a human being. I am a threat to society, so they say, yet all I ever do is stay the same.
we all have a calling in life
a purpose, a mission
lost in darkness, soon there'll be light
our future is based on our decisions
the journey will be hard
hold onto your faith
follow your heart
My anger pours out as I scream for some release.
I want to be gone and away from this beast.
Nothing I say is ever enough for you.
I cannot be content as long as I'm being used.
Set me free I repeatedly scream.
Despair and darkness have taken over my life
This is nothing new
I've gone through and put up with a lot of strife
What is one more day of hell when your life is a pit of fire?
You ruined me
As I walk down the lonely, abandoned street, I see old, unpolished houses trying to stand still as if it’s about to fall apart any second.
"Drug abuse"- that makes me abusive.
So why do I feel like I'm the one who's been beaten?
Not the beaten that leaves bloodied lips and brown bruises
But the beaten
that leaves you in last place
in a contest
My Door
My door keeps people in or out when I
Want to be alone. I do not understand
Why others do not comprehend this fact.
My door represents privacy at home –
In this universe, there’s too much pain
From people to people, it’ a non-ending train
Trying not to give in time
Wasting is not a try
Good, bad, jealous, uncaring
My life is worth nothing, but an empty space
More than eternity darkness
More than bottomless ocean
Because I am who I am
My life feels like the bottom of a dark miserable hole
She cries into the nightAs she heads for the skyHer face is full of PainShe has nothing to gain. She cries herself to sleep
I cry at night when no one heres me, no one listens to me anyways. I yell in the day but no one heres still. No one knows the pain I'm in, no one knows anything about me.
Walking slowly
my head faced down
but it is too dark
to see the ground
Into the unknown
I keep walking Still
into my skin it pierces
the cold deathly chill
I'm sitting here, lost inside my own head, losing my thread, not sure if I'm alive or dead. My mind can't seem to catch a grip on reality, I'm slipping away from sociality, watch out for my whismicality.
The most dangerous urges are tempting me again
And if I shall cross the path, I will lose a friend
If you go there once, there's a price to pay
The battle within myself to stay at bay
Today I'll wear my happy mask, because I'm feeling sad
And I've worn out my tired mask, from the weeks that I've been mad
At my friend who wears his loving mask, when he looks at her,
--How much pain
How many tears
How many times must I say the word LOVE
How many broken hearts must I suffer from
How many times do I have to stare at a blank response
How many lies
The "men" walk across these halls as if the king,
Treating their special girl like the queen they deserve to be.
Mother nature did not come back,
The king had decided its time to flee.
I stole this bottle of wine from my parents.
The bottle say red.
I once heard my father say it is romantic,
an hour later
I seem to hate myself the most when I am alone, I think I have come so far... yet it's my metaphoric brains I wish to blow. There is so much I want to accomplish, but so much more I need to let go.
we will be strangers in this bed soon -
we will be unclear how to rub hug and snuggle. the auto flash turned off
now the only light that shines are the streelights....beaming in dark rooms
I have never realizedHow alone I've felt until this very moment...It hit me like I had just ran into a brick wallI hate how horrible I feelHow depressing this emotion isAnd to think that my biggest fear was to be aloneWhen I've felt alone for 4 yr
Alone.
5 words.
2 syllables.
A major problem within itself.
Not only are we the cause but we are the reason.
Yet as time passes something begins to happen.
I know what this is.
This is the hammer you wield
Pounding against my head.
Though you are no Thor,
But rather a monster
Love is hysterical
Such is the hysteria that you do not even realize when it has made camp within your walls
Embedding itself within your soul
Until it is ripped from the place in which it was rooted
They think I'm happy
But that's a lie
A whirl of emotions trapped inside
I have weak walls and when they're struck
Sometimes I shed a tear.
Or two.
Or three.
I don't understand these feelings, it's been driving me insane.
No matter how appealing, you still can cause me pain.
I can't stand these emotions, it's tearing me apart.
Any Miny Mo
Another guy picked hoe.
Leaving her standing alone,
Giving up.
He sits in a corner.
Because his feelings,
He is a hoarder.
Left to give up.
What do you see when you look at me?
Do you see someone who is happy as can be?
Did you ever think that that's what I want you to see?
In truth my feelings don't comply.
I had learned the skill by being a spy.
My feet smell
And neglect appears to be my only friend.
People hang out and talk with me
We share only words
Though nothing articulate.
I don't want to be alone today.My thoughts are too loud on my own.I want to talk. Or listen.So I don't have to hear the words in my head.
Even if it is the perfect time for
Your intrepid morning coffee,
It's not so great for the threads of wonder
That spun in your mind last night
But eventually helped you to K.O
The sun has a waking effect
On those left for dead
Decidedly a lost cause
Because they more easily bled
These band aids can only cover surface wounds
And as the sun reaches down
What the hell is wrong with these peopleTreating others way less than equalWe have to fix this nowCause this isn't a movieAnd there won't be a sequelAn ignorant mind is feeble
Birds fly awayAs the sky turns black and greyMeteors rainBuildings engulfed in flamesPeople are crazed, enraged, and others are afraidExpected to listen to what the TV said
I walk into the room, no one looks up,
I stand just outside the group, no one seems to see.
At first I think, "It must be me."
Then I realize, it's you.
Yeah…It’s that hurt.
When you look around, and you realize
Damn it, you’re alone.
You live where your heart is
But you don’t have a home.
So you just stay there where your house is,
Why am I always the one to get hurt?Does pain have no compassion?Let the fierceness of the stormCalm downCause the waves keep pushing meAway from life and reality
(I wake up feeling) the numb that
accompanies that white pill
(that) killer of (pain,)
I took last night.
I feel the loneliness
Cheer for everyone.
Although, no one cheers for you,
Cheer for everyone
I had spent days, what had seemed to be months clenching to the piece of life I had. I was lost, in a chaotic silence, hoping and praying for redemption, for savior.
Pretend the pain is gone, that good is demolishing every part of evil. Why don’t you pretend everything’s your long-lost fantasy, the world you’ve been waiting for, your desire you’ve been burning for.
Silence
My mother always asks me,
Why I can never seem to sit still.
My muscles tighten and an excuse is quickly constructed,
Horrors hidden everywhere
In darkness and despair.
Looking in the shadows
In corners everywhere.
Secrets of evil pulling its
You came back changed, I don't know you anymore.
You don't even know yourself anymore,
where did you go?
You left yourself across seas and he's scared,
it's just the wounds of war.
Liar, Liar pants on fire
“Mama,” her body began to spark more and more with each step
“I’m going to Emily’s house,” her eyes began to glow hungry for fuel
Everyday, I wake up but nothing ever happens. I've been pushed here, there, and everywhere. I feel alone, so alone I just want to end my own life.
I like to eat sleep and be alone
empty messages, no missed calls on my phone
Walk through the streets contemplating on life
no one to go on dates or make me their wife
Old friends and family call to hang out
i made a mistake
i made a mistake
i made a mistake
i made a mistake
no...it was my fault
the words you howl in pure disgust
the words i take in and attempt to digest
The briny breathes of the Humber welcomed my parents to the its shores,
and left their cheeks flushed along with their hair unkempt.
With each waking breathe,
my soul quivers for fear.
I cant stop these feelings inside me.
He tells me to breathe
only breathe,
its all we ever have left
but why?
Everywhere I turn there are hundreds
Of dazzling smiles
So, so many are surrounding me
In a radius of miles
But not me, no. I do not smile
Because I am no one
walking out in the after glowthrown about in the drunk beyond,looking for my wandering doglaid out upon the ground.
battle scars black and bluescratched up knees -all for you,that fence post did me in.
Imprisoned Life
Within a cage the heart does cry,
No hope to stand against a lie
And beats in pain to be set free
Who am I when the lights go down
When no one is around
I look at myself to see
Who I can be
But I don't see me
I see a reflection
I see the girl I pretend to be
The pretty face
The day is bright but there is no lightYou wonder how this could beIf you were meYou could surely seeThe beauty infront of me
There are many things in life you see
That make me think of what you could be
The thought of you every night
If you had only stayed in my sight
When I think of the day
That broke my heart
Mournful weeping rips through leaves
And dewdrop tears rest so silently
And I sit here perched up high
Looking down at the time gone by
I wonder of the years I've wasted
I want you
to smile and laugh
to relish in the sunlight
and love by the moonlight.
I want you
to visit my dusty bookshelf
and read my favorite book
and try to understand why it speaks to me.
Everybody knows my name
But ignores me just the same
To most I’m just a nerd
My social skills absurd
I’m where to go for help
A whale among the kelp
My work is nearly flawless
I can’t sleep. During the day I’m tired. At night I’m awake,
I’m not hungry, I just want to drink.
I don’t have money. I want to be alone.
I cannot let you see me cry
It's not that I don't have something to cry over
I don't know why when I cry
I run for cover
rather than the open arms of my mother
I cannot let you see me cry
Grasping at shadows. Reaching for Ghosts. Searching for figures along the coast. Looking for something real, something to hold onto. A single shred of proof that I am not alone.
It was the coward's way out, he knew. He could feel it rolling around in his gut like a stupidly cheerful puppy.
Of days when I have forced my will
To school, and kept myself so still,
And haven't uttered cries of grief,
Of your incompetent relief -
Deriving from your lack of skill,
In the ability to feel
As the trees become pale
The life sucked out of fragile leaves.
The sky, covered in dull, meaningless clouds.
I watch as Earth welcomes Winter
With a friendly, extended hand.
pitter-patter like little feetraindrops tapping on mine pane
bitter burns hiss and slitherremembrance dismantles my sane
moist summers and eerie chimesfingertips lost within your mane
I’d say it in person, but I fear rejection
Because when a student speaks out there’s surely ejection
You ask who I am, just look at my friends
I stay true to my values while others change like trends
i am scared
i am here
on the outside
i show no fear
this is new
i am here
within time
there will be no fear
i am scared
i am here
on the outside
i show no fear
this is new
i am here
within time
there will be no fear
When you see this soft-spoken, shy girl sitting at her desk,
You see someone weak
As I quietly doodle away on my note-pad,
You see someone distracted
When every other girl giggles and laughs with her friends,
I know what you're thinking,Why me, right?Out of all the other boys,The jocks, the rich kids, the artists,You choose me.
When I'm Alone in the quiet dark all by myself and merely with my thoughts the mind can run rampant.
In one word, what vague or obvious system of letters could sum up an entire existance, is it possible?
There is a time when one must step back
and see the tens of thousands of backstories
working together to build
one
using only the tissue of the heart.
They carve in and haul out,
Here’s to you, here’s to me,
Here’s to us and all that means,
Here’s to the girl who is all alone,
Here is to the child newly grown,
Raise this one to all the teens crying,
Broken promises left in the open
The stench of nicotine and dried up roses
Clouded vision by the smoke
Don't think, don't think, don't speak
Cold air filling a dried throat
Whispered screams in the sheets
3 minutes without oxygen
too deep underwater to
wonder if I can get to the surface
3 hours without shelter
tooth chatteringly cold and I
want to go home
3 days without water
I’m the quiet one
who talks
too quickly under the bright lights of a school
I’m the one on the sidelines
the only one watching
without better things to do
Can't take it anymore
Like flowers in a storm
I've always been an angel
With a demon in the core.
Your love is true,
but this "us"
does neither you
nor I any good.
'Cause,
In the end,
this big house
is still empty
and I remain alone,
in the silence,
You were my rockBut I found you too stable,Immobile, grounding, so IShattered you -A man broken into thirty-three pieces,Mere pebbles of the boulder you were.
Hear the laughter and not the end
Past mistakes in my head
Break the tip of my pencil lead
The end of the end is only the beginning
When I listen to those words
I only hope that you're kidding
A suffering rose,
abandoned there,
on a lonely windowpane,
not sparing a stare.
Looks up at the sky,
as a lost cause,
nowhere to go,
no place to pause.
Weeping quietly,
Here I am, again I sit alone, time passes slowly as I constantly check my phone.
I scan the room ony to find sympathetic stares, me at the table with a bunch of empty chairs.
Typical dork
Sneaky,geeky
Tutor, poet, plays chess
Inside a normal teenager
Misunderstood
the Girl with the Red Hair, the scowled lips the Pretentious curl,The sun's grace, but as fierce as snake venom.Tongue made of butterfly wings and unspoken dreams. I watch from afar,
Want it gone
Away forever
But I know
That it’ll never.
Focus on one
Impossible.
Focus on many
Probable.
Living a little is being in touch with reality.
You love.
You laugh.
You cry.
You hurt.
I tried to outrun the realities of life, but then reality hit me; you can’t outrun life.
I am young but old
I wonder what it feels like to fly
I hear the whisper of a butterfly's wing
I see the colors of the wind
I want to go to heaven one day and see my grandma
I am young but old
Can't breathe, need air,Hands shaking, almost there.Rushing, pulling, running,The taste, simply stunning.
There is a place I go
When I'm alone
A quiet space
Away from all the chaos
Of the world
that we've misnamed home
When there is time to spare
It is there
That I will wander
BEING ALONE IS different THAN BEING LONELY
BEING ALONE IS SOMETHING YOU choose
BEING LONELY IS not
Sometimes....Sometimes it feels like I'm all alone. Alone on a earth, filled with beings that have no human soul
I feel like I'm alone with no being to relate to.
I know its not true
I admit that I hate I'm feeling alone...
Checking for texts with every second,
But the black covers my phone.
It doesn't light up every minute
Like my sister and my mom's
So I keep waiting here, here
Will anyone finally understand the pain,
the one in my heart?
For so long I kept it there,
but to what end?
Dig away from all the dissappointment
I get lonley in caves all by myself.
Thoughts lose everything all in the moment,
Scraping nails upon walls, all blood runs high.
I’m so gone.
Literally.
There is a distant look in my eyes.
And I go further and further away every day.
I’m gone.
If I come back, that’s God’s will.
I don't like to be ignored.
Actually I HATE to be ignored.
And fuck those of you who immediately think that I am an attention whore.
I'm not, I just don't like to be ignored.
All that glitters isn't gold
And all that shimmers isn't diamond
Just because you think you know me,
Doesn't mean you really do.
I can guarantee you that I'm not
The person who you think I am,
As a little girl
I looked up at the world
Naive and shy
Watching clouds roll by
Why couldn't I leave
I needed set free
Free from what, you wonder?
A feeling in my heart, like thunder
thighs have a testimony but those stories can not be shared
too many disguise their cares
and I rather be shy than shed tears because I have fears
of being penalized for my thighs
Speak to me Softly
Hold me near
Stroke me gently
And wipe away fear
Hold me close
As soft as a dove
Give me a dose
A dose of you're love
I'm addicted
Why I Write.
Well, I write because my lips are sealed,
Im speechless,
The words on the paper stab at my meekness and rips open my flesh,
Only to show that the outside is decent but the inside is a mess.
Alone in a room
a broken girl lays.
Eyes once so brown
now have gone grey.
In the flesh of her arm
is a quote scarred in ink.
It reads, "Don't follow others
if they contrast your beliefs."
So you won’t have an answer
But I know I have a question
Why am I brushed off
In the times of my stressin’
Yes I give advice
And yes I can smile
But don’t you really think
I love just to sit.
Not thinking hard on anything.
I love just to sit.
Playing my Levi the Poet,
Loud in my headphones.
I sit and just stare.
I stare at a blank page.
will does not force my mask,
a loney mood and empty flask,
does make my mind go numb,
behind this smile that you see,
is not a face so carefree,
abandon hope of helpful hands,
in crispy cold, the wafer moon flies
there's a loneliness that backhands this repeating demise
all the stars around me seem as pores to the sky
and my pores breathe them in like millions of eyes
The morning comes,
And the feeling of you next to me dispels.
How cruel my mind is to me;
It made me believe,
That the dream of you
Sleeping next to me,
Was reality.
I could have sworn
I spent all day crying over you again. I can’t stop it hurts so much. So maybe you don’t love me as much as I love you.OKAY. FINE.
To feel the freedom of the brush
Against the flowing canvas,
To watch the color mix and twist
Full of overflowing vision
To create and make a piece of art
Made with expression and feeling
Eyes are the window to the soul they say.
What, my eyes show this day?
Sorrow, memories, pain
Every day of rain.
Why?
Rough life is
Not for all showbiz.
Hard, cruel, unkind
I wish you were with me right now, so you could see the tears spilling out of my eyes. If you saw me cry, would you change your mind? I wish you could hold me close and whisper that everything will be alright.
I have wasted precious paper figuring you out
And I know you know just exactly what that's like
I'm sure you'll never spare a word for me
But I would expect you've got much better things clouding your mind
It gets so silent sometime that I wonder if God can even hear me,
No one to talk to because everyone has their own problems,
So to cope I throw my thoughts into a bottle,
Tighten it up so no one can get to them.
Lonely but Glad Happy but sad Alone but surrounded Singing but silent Alive but dead Smooth but with a dent Silent but screaming Loud but quiet Crushed but dreaming I stood but He left
There is no greater felon, than that of the innocent bystander:
He who sees...
Does no wrong.
Does no good.
The person who witnesses pain and suffering and,
There's a beehive in my heartwhose bees buzz all nightthey’ve built honeycombs in my veinsmaking me as stiff as a tin man with no oil
I bleed honeyand it attracts bears
Something isn't right,
this feeling I feel.
I see no sight,
but this is real.
This insane pain,
is something I can't handle.
I hide away in shame,
In this world I only have me
No one cares if I fall off the face of the earth
They wouldnt come looking for me
Just one less person in this world
Im out in the shadows and once in a while people notice me
What might be okay today
won't be okay tomorrow.
When your mind allows impulses to take over,
it's like you're giving up,
you gave up your strength.
Strength is usually what helps me through,
She cried black tears , she can feel the blood in her heart freeze over
As her breathing gets slower the cuts get deeper, scared with memories
Of his hands striking her face, helpless no escape , even though shes a
walk continously
walk endlessy
and see the diverging paths
there are too many too count
for they show the entirety of man
some lead to pain
others to darkness
and some to love
Aren't we all lonely
Aren't we all sick
sick of eachother's talk and shit
we fight, we cry, and sit
all to just swallow and forget
Engrossed lies
regurgitating goodbyes
A fool, a joke.
I didn't know what else to expect.
I thought he was cool
And now everything's been wrecked.
I nonchalantly sat their alone while the night sky fell upon me, while rodents ran past my feet. The stench of overfilled trash dumpster and the worlds left over garbage of people sat near by.
As sons and daughter of the most high God
We have standards to uphold, as we are representing Zion
And as we live in a dark and hateful world
I sit alone inside this empty room,
And find myself some time to hurt and think;
Just wondering if I will break down soon,
Because these days have passed in one quick blink.
Each day is spent in busy distraction,
The crowded room is much too small for you;
From locks of hair to smiles of gold you dance,
And yet not once did you give me a glance;
But with one glance I would give all to you.
The corner suits me well, invisible
When I was younger,
I had always wished to be Invisible.
I used to put a blanket over my head,
hide in corners of the room.
I always thought of how cool it would be
to be there but unseen.
I saw the SHALLOW SOULS of my generation induced by
the spirited connection of NEGATIVITY’S SPELL
Being judgmental on a person’s looks
Doing nothing but mope about being a nobody
Lonely.
Interesting word,
horrible feeling
You feel every syllable
Especially the "low"
Happens randomly
Out of the blue you are struck
Completely
Alone.
Can't sit in your room and hide
As I grew older, my mind became bolder
With every touch of passion, I become clutched
I began to write when I began to reason reality, a creative formation status of my full mentality
as you look upon the water
reflections shining bright
bringing to your memory
thoughts from that dark night
the tears erode my heart
as the colorodo carved a canyon
my life it fell apart
when you died myself my faith abandoned
sometimes when no-one else is around
in the dark i start to cry
then you can hear the saddest sound
of a tear about to die
One lonely book
trying to find its place on the shelf
it sat with the comedies, red with laughter
but it did not laugh
it sat with the actions, black with suspense
but it did not sit on edge
I used to meet you in the park.
You had pride- you said.
"This is only temporary.
I'm looking for a job,
Not living on welfare."
You've got my mind working overtime
Stole my heart, you've done the crime
I can't find the words I should say-
Hearing from you brightens my day
Say to voice my feelings for you
I'm sick of doing this.
See I just want you.
But do I make you happy?
Do you want me too?
A relationship can make you mad,
but is all the time accurate?
Another day, another hour
Until I walk past a lonely flower
I stare at it’s beauty and it’s grace
That’s when I realize that I slowed my pace.
That one feast during that one time of the year
That one moment when calories don't matter, we have no fear
Across that one big table we can barely see
Through that one turkey big enough for the entire family
Twisted wrong
Stepped over upon
I glare up to see
While on the ground
I see myself
To be the one
Who tortured me all along
And I now see
What wrong
I've done to myself
My body and soul detached
from the spine that weaves them
sinks and floats, respectively, with no
direction.
Alone, not wanted by anyone
Feelings of love no longer entwine my heart.
I am on the brink of chaos, destruction, hopelessness.
Darkness swirls around me
Clouding my hopes, my dreams.
You’re at a red light and a homeless man approaches you
And you act like you have nothing when you’re sitting in your BMW
(poems go here) I am the color green,I am the grass,I am the leaves in the trees,
I am the wind that blow's through the trees as i sing passing bye
every tree,
She’s cold and isolated
The demons lurk beneath
People think they know her
But the beauty’s just skin deep
And she wants to run away
From the hurt and the pain
No one sees the shackles trailing,
As the moon looks down
Waxing, waning, glowing light
‘Tis good company
Beauty of the moon
Overwhelms the stars
No comparison
In the sky, flawless
Celestial perfection
Never cease to be
If you were here
It would all be different
The way the leaves fall off the trees
They could glide the way lips graze over teeth in smiles
I padlocked the miles so distance could be kept
In a vault where nothing of value could be dreamt
Can you slam my fingers in a metal door
Till they crunch and I can't touch
No not anymore
I am alone
Surrounded by people yet still on my own
Severed connections, we cannot relate
A wall is between us, it refuses to break
The wall is my own, I built it myself
In the early evening, I come home from the park.
And inside my house there are shadows in the dark!
At the corner it stands.
Resolute.
An unmoving, unfailing symbol of strength.
It's seen much.
It has seen a lost child wandering,
the shadows of dangerous men,
the rush of runaway lovers.
I was the oldest,
So I should’ve died first,
But now you’re buried in the ground,
At only twenty-one years young,
They say you were hung,
And now I’m listening to sad songs,
Did you hate us all that much,
Lost in a shadow,
So black and cold,
A terrible life,
That was put on hold,
Can't find my way back,
I'm confused and alone,
I wish I was completely turned to stone,
Fighting to keep the past behind
Fighting to keep the ground underneath my feet
While all around the world dissolves to ashes
All around me
Take away my lifelines
Watch me fade away
I am the Gravity Killer
Wake me up with nightmares
Fill my head with ash
I am the Shadowman
Mother once told me
That everything was ok
That there was another day
For me to believe
And feel relieved
But nothing was ok.
The tears blurred the vision in the young girl's eyes.
She knew not the paths which she crossed and yet,
Without turning back,
She ran into a frantic sprint far beyond regret;
Like a bird freshly torn from its cage,
I. Summer, the dramatic scene
As the stars are blinking,
fading in and out,
the bright moon smiles,
slowly rising in the navy blue sky.
Time enchants her victim, begs me near to sharp being…
Wraps round frail shoulders as she tickles porcelain cheek.
I bet you don't even notice
That your criticisms really hurt
Please try to screen
The awful things that you blurt.
I feel no pity.
Not even a little bit
To leave the city
In which I
With my existence
Didn't bring the light,
Didn't love the stranger,
therefore, this place has nothing
I would consider mine.
I take a knife
And slit my skin,
Exposing my heart
Reach in
And tear it out still beating
Its erratic rhythm.
I show my exposed story,
My deepest truth
Only to One
Who gives me a reaction
My heart races
Tears form
Breathing struggles
This happens often
She yells then leaves
Someone says 'shut up'
I try to stay calm
But I feel like I'm suffocating
It’s dark and cold and I’m lonely.
The cold wind rushes pass me tearing my face apart with its harshness.
I shiver.
My hands are too stoned to move.
I’m pale.
It's 3am and you're feeling cold
Why not a bath?
Yes, but it won't last forever.
Well... At least it will for a moment.
I am the dog that pulls the mandrake,
a choice that isn't mine.
A worm upon His hook;
freedom only comes with time.
Waiting,
staring out a tiny porthole,
your only contact with the ground and safety,
you roll lazily past another winged steel beast.
They seem to nod at each other.
Lonely Child
A cast-off Loner,
A battle-weary Child
—whose cries become quieter and quieter
After realizing no one hears.
My music speaks. My music leads me through the dark, when I cry, my music speaks. My music comforts me through the joy, when I smile, my music speaks. My music heals the wounds, when I hurt, my music speaks.
The girl with the glasses,
walks home alone.
No one to talk to.
No one to know.
The girl with the glasses,
sits at lunch by herself.
No one to eat with.
No one to be with.
Come down to the river
Come watch with me
See the ripples and the flow
Of the water as it goes
As what goes?
Your mind
Set it free. Find peace
Peace where?
Out there, on the rocks;
The dawn of my stormy life was drawn,
on the streets of a lonely town,
pawns in a game with silence,
no response,
within the ideas that formed this gloomy glum lake,
I am in pain,
From my head to my chest,
Nothing has changed,
I always tried my best,
But it did nothing,
I don’t belong here,
I am something,
But I can’t shed a tear,
I am in pain,
There have been wounds in my life.
I'm used to the pain.
I have been chasing love.
I'm invisible on this earth,
I'm always transparent.
Even by my own parents.
I have learned since I was older...
i am blinded by my tears
as voices screech uncontrollably in my ears.
i reach out to find relief,
but all that returns are thoughts of defeat.
Bees are sitting
On the Wind
Drifting
Feeding
On the Wind
Bringing life to those once dead
Bees are searching
On the Wind
My knees are weak
They begin to tremble
From fear of deceit
My body longed for home,
that was calling for me.
How did I get to this point ?
I feel like I've lost all hope,
stranded I was.
Lonely is my heart that little sees family,
For I live away from home and loved-souls.
Away from familiar faces, to pursue dreams,
I abide in the state of sunshine and citrus,
I am always there for my friends,
But is anyone there for me?
No,
Can I go out on weekends?
Yes,
But I will be alone,
Or with my love,
But that is not so bad,
Do my friends even think of me?
No one knows my pain,
My best friend,
Only calls when she is sad,
But otherwise,
Do I even exist?
I want to go out,
On weekends,
But,
No one calls,
Do they even try?
IN A WORLD FULL OF PEOPLE
why do I feel so alone?
With a life so blessed
Why do I feel so poor?
Perhaps poor of happiness
or poor of self confidence
Plastered by the image of over confident or cocky
We sat down on an old brown wooded bench in the pouring rain
He held me tight and he told me to tell him what I was feeling
I told him I was feeling okay..
My Prince Charming that swept me away, in my state of haze and disarray; You held me close in your warm embrace, it was in your arms I knew I was safe; But it didn't stay that way; I was snatched away, left in the cold to shiver, to die; On my own
You see her
She’s 16
The prodigal age
The year of first love and heartbreak, obstacles and triumph
She reads to escape unpleasant realities
She writes to express deepest desires
BFFL’s For Life?
I had to find new friends,
Coming to a new place.
The ones that would truly love me,
And never leave me,
This became my new race.
The silence of the room is not overwhelming,
It is peaceful,
The perfect template for imagination and dreaming.
No noise disrupts trains of thought
No whisper breaks through the wall of the mind.
Alienated and lonely,
Sad and afraid.
Speaking out is not an option,
help; a foreign word.
Touchy hands.
Slimy hands.
Dirty hands.
Rough hands.
Dana never could remember what was proper to say
His only concern ever was to make someone's day.
So when Dana saw a girl, as lonely as could be,
He walked up to that girl, and that girl was me.
This is a take over for the Earth.
I wish you drowning in dreams as it seems.
the planet will be dead soon anyway.
I hope you cut your throat and bleed blue,
because thats how I feel.
How could you have done this to me
Showin up only when its convent for you
But what about me
I was so posed to be your Princess
your Little Girl
Did anyone hear about the LONELY BUG?
It's going around like a crazy giving out lonely hugs
You can never tell when it's coming
One day you'll just find yourself giving in
To all the pressures of the world
I try to be what other's want me to be,
I try to see the good in the negativity around me,
no matter what the cost.
No matter what i may feel.
But the more i try, the more i feel vacant.
Everyday I ask myself
What will i have to prove.
Do i have to hang always
Heavy in that perfect imagination?
Is that what my life is for?
Is that the way of life?
Stiff and unchanging.
No one hears her screams,
but still she screams for her life.
No one see's her,
but still she clings to life.
She is further away then she thought.
Not waving; knowing this, she just drowns.
Have you ever tried
To hold back from crying
Just to show other that you
Aren't as weak as they say?
Secretly as you cry
You wish you weren't, but its
Just so overwhelming.
How are you?
It's awful I don't know.
Where have you been?
Not in my life; that's for sure
Why did you leave?
I can't seem to find you.
Why am I still here?
You left me behind you.
Use to drink all the time,
torn up from sky to ground,
lock up two or three,
times ago,
you don't know,
how it is to slip,
I have once falled under,
take pain pills at christmas,
