Dear Loneliness

Dear Loneliness,


I remember how you came into my life at the age of nine

When all my friends stood together at the front of the lunch line


And although it was running through my mind

I hid my sadness that came from being left behind


You followed me when I moved schools in the fifth grade

Abandoning all the little friendships in the past I had made


I did not seem to fit in with anyone around

So I often found myself alone at the playground


When the lottery system of a charter school drew my name

I took this as a chance to run from you and your wicked game


Soon after fifth grade came to an end

I transferred schools feeling ready to make a friend


In sixth grade I met someone interesting and new

But as time went by, I couldn’t help feeling blue


Because our differences caused us to drift apart

Which meant that I would have to build a new start


In middle school, I wanted to forget about you

But feeling like an outcast, the loneliness inside me only grew


While others laughed mercilessly together during lunch time

I sat solo in a classroom doing homework as if talking were a crime


One day, however, I was sure that you disappeared without a trace

When a kind-hearted girl invited me to sit with her and chat face-to-face


After that day, I began to branch out and establish friendships of many

And you left my mind as I entered high school with a smile bright as a penny


Even though I feel content where I currently stand

Sometimes I catch a glimpse of you as if you are the back of my hand


For example, during quiet evenings in the summer of June

When others are out with their friends as I talk alone to the moon


Or when I find myself sitting in crowded rooms

Filled with strangers, their unfamiliarity looms


Loneliness, I am learning not to let you get the best of me

By knowing that things are fine even when I’m by myself and not attending a party


As I am starting to understand that being alone does not symbolize loneliness

I know that I can one day defeat you and the feeling of hopelessness


But as for now, I will continue taking things at the right speed

To break out of my shell and discover what truly defines “me.”



Vanessa Lu












This poem is about: 
My community
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