Drugs
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You can hear them in the nurseries addicted before they breathe.
You can rock them, gently rock them, but still the babies grieve.
You can watch them on a playground fighting foes that don’t exist,
Dear Dad,
I don't even know where to start.
You're still alive, but I feel like you have been gone for a long time.
I miss who you were when you didn't drink, I hardly remember that person anymore.
three houses, one hotel, and it seemed every guy
on my street still conversed at the corner. there's
always an element to hide; some grams of H' to
the breast pocket, weed and some ganja. Green;
John Brown died in 2019, it's sad and it's true.If he hadn't died, today he would've turned 52.We met at Bean Station Elementary School in 1979.We quickly became friends, he was a buddy of mine.
When a man took drugs, it wasn't intelligent or nifty.Drugs killed him one year ago today at the age of 50.He was born in 1971 and perished after living on this earth for five decades.
When my friend was a teenager, he started smoking pot.If you're wondering if my friend is still alive, sadly, he's not.The pot that he smoked led him to take worse drugs like Meth.
My head, it hurts,
my nose, it burns,
but I know it will all go away,
I start to float up,
I start to see black,
and I know that I am free.
I don't have to worry,
I dont have to fear,
I know in a moment of weakness I failed you
I can't rewrite the past
Only move on
I write here today not to mop but rather to reminisce
Because three times of confrontation is not enough
Because your marriage is not enough
Because your daughter isn't enough
There’s ALWAYS MUCH To CONSIDER When It Comes To FAMOUS Figures...
Who Are QUICKER To Pull Triggers Than The Best Olympic Sprinters... !!!
Cos' There Are Always ... BIGGER PICTURES...
Where There’s ALWAYS Someone QUICKER...
Hiding in mundane scenes of normality, somebody's vacant kitchen feels like it could never feel like home to anyone, it's haunted by the living
You’ve sat down, and you watch me fumble with the guitar. My thoughts wander. I’m drunk.
I sit, watching him drink even though he’s wasted.
Blotchy skin, red and damp, and the slick guitar strummed under slurring words.
Peter Piper Picked a Pair of Pills to Pop
Just to see what they’d do to him
He Popped a cocktail stocked with
Adderall, Buspar, Benzos and Zoloft-
I can still feel the needle peirce my skin
Taste the glass stem between my lips
I can still feel the white girl flowing into my veins
My body going numb, between my ears hearing the train
The insects are at peace.
Living their lives essentially pleased.
It doesn't take much to fulfill their needs.
How are they so strong, and I so weak?
I feel so scared and weak.
Sit down; let's play a game.
Sleep sound; the monster's been tamed.
Still loud; the voices scream:
"Let me out; you know you're just a fiend."
"Slow down; I don't wanna play.
i wish you would hold me
like you hold that glass bottle
like its the only thing that can comfort you,
the only thing that accepts you,
the only thing capable of keeping your demons at bay
breeze like soft hands brushing hair out of my eyes
dandelion seeds float through the sun-bathed sky light as feathers
soft earth below my feet is humble and grounding
So What's The... " DEAL "...
With Those Who Use Drugs
To Make Their Lives Run... ???
By This I Mean...
How Do DRUGS Make Lives For THUGS... ?!?
And BUILD THEIR... " KINGDOMS "... !?!
He did drugs for many years and he finally had to pay.Because of his drug use, he died one year ago today.He overdosed last year and sadly, he could not survive.
Your eyes are cold dark dead like your soul you say you believe in God almighty in Jesus name amenI hear your voice ringing in my ears my hearts beatingI hear the bell ringing, the door knocking the card chopping My hearts beatingClick click click
The Ashtray In The Corner
There’s an ashtray in the corner
Ghost of past lovers on my wall
They’re haunting my propriety
My dad was murdered, it occured when I was seven, to him it was a filler but to me
heroin is a killer. After he was gone, I went to, I managed to lie even as I cried.In a
She wears her long sleeves, even in the summer, To cover her secret, to cover her shame.
It’s the only thing shes ever found, that quiets down her pain.
You promised
To never leave me.
But you did.
And I will never be the same.
You were there
For me
When times were
The toughest
But now they're
Harder.
The drugs “did it”
You didn’t mean to hit me
You didn’t mean to scream at me
You didn’t mean to say all those things you said
But yet, you still lost me
I smell the whiskey on your breath
Third day this week
Once again you had too much
Once again you took too much
Why must I love you so much?
I take drugs to feel good, boy.You lie like a liar should, boy.I don't trust, but who would, boy,after all I've been through?
Monastery monochrome,
boom balloon machine, and oh,
diamond rings and gutter bones.
Marching up some mountain,
with our aching planning.
coke and acid and weed and girls that weren’t me
but you were my only drug
my only addiction
and to you, to you my drug of choice,
to you I was loyal
A Tribute to My Mother || Written 2 Years Ago
You have painted flowers on my spine
Twisted your love into my ribcage
Shattered my aching bones, I am you
She's One of THEM Who DISMISSES Men ... !!!!!!!
Because She Says She's INDEPENDENT ... !!!!!
And In This Case THIS ONE Is French ...
It Can't Be Good To Hold The View ...
That I'm A CROOK Because My Top Has Got A Hood ... !?!
The Weather Now Can Be Quite FOUL ... !!!
WITHOUT An Umbrella I Could Be DROWNED ... !!!!!
A Report I've Read Today ...
Has Left Me Feeling Quite AMAZED ... !!!!!
These Days I'm AMAZED In .... " SO MANY WAYS " ... !!!
People Seem To Think That Things Are OKAY ... ?!?
A Law Passed Today Has Left Me ... AMAZED ... !!!
These Days It's REALLY HARD To Find ....
People Who USE The ... " Power of The Mind" ... !!!
So MANY Walk Blind And MISS The Signs ... !?!
Because They're STUCK Behind Coc’ Lines ... !!!
I'd Rather Feed Brains Than ... " ENTERTAIN " .... !!!!!
How Many Who Do ... Now Use Cocaine ... ?!?
I'm Saying ... I'm SAYING ... !!!
These People Maintain ...
That Doing Cocaine Helps raiSE Their Game ... !!!
They Seem STRANGE To Me Don't They To You ... ?!?
The Things That People Sometimes Do .... ?
Don't Worry Folks I'll Give You PROOF ...
That People Make Some FUNNY Moves ... ?!?
If You LIKE Coc' REMEMBER This Quote ... !!!
You May One Day Just End Up Broke ... !!!
COCAINE Gives Lows As Well As ... " Highs " ...
And Has DESTROYED Some Peoples' Lives ... !!!!!
What do we do When war wages wild In our own homes Ten times over And the time to fight Grows ever near? Do we wait Here in secrecy In the dark, dreary, cold And pathetically distant Land we call our own? Or do we “begin To solve the problem”?
Man Things Are Now Beyond A JOKE .... !!!!!
Is EVERYBODY Taking Coc' ... ?!!!?!!!?
Cos' Those Who Do Deserve To CHOKE ... !!!!!!!!
Burn choke crack
Smoking Crack
To fill the crack
Smells like crack
To just get some smack
Id be alive again
Feel alive again
Try again
Walking on eggshells
Screaming In room is hard for me.
It's hard to believe you really cared for me.
You said you loved me but apparently you loved pills more.
Now somedays I wish I would have answered your voice at the door.
How are you?
Im fine.
Are you sure?
Im fine.
You look sad though...
Im fine.
So no cravings?
Im fine.
If you're going to the same party I am,
please don't ask where I'll be.
I'll be wearing my revenge dress, dancing with a boy with blue hair or a girl with a nose ring,
and you don't want to see that.
I climb out my window just to see if I can.
My parents used to be police officers, no joke,
yet here I am in the clubhouse of a legitimate gang.
When I was a dope fiend I had written words,
(taken pen to paper time and time again)
that barely scratched the surface of things that got me going,
that started me.
Chicken scratched letters embedded
I can walk into an all-you-can-eat buffet,
and my brain will light up like a gambling addict's.
Numbers running in my brain,
neon signs floating above plates counting fat and carbs and sugar,
my guts are knotted uptwisted
i've been overthinking
my old nature of sin seeking
left my heart unwhole
and leaky
nerves got the best of me
anxiety
keeps my chest sinking
You and your ideas of luck and things
that sad men sing and empty rooms bleed.
There really wasn’t any need for you to be kind,
Cause things got so much harder on the west coast.
When i moved here i realised i needed you most.
One week i had a lover, the next, a ghost.
I know what you are.
Mom
They asked me how I was affected
at the situations you exposed an reflected
Everyone has that one thing
That distracts us for a time
Alcohol, drugs or that special someone
They take away the depression, they take away the pain
You’re not here anymoreto laugh at my stupid jokesand say “I love you”to make me feel specialor loved in any way.You’re not here anymoreto make me breathethe air that you’ve become to me
Just one more
I promise that’s it
Just one more
Then I promise I’ll quit.
Those lies you spoke
for so many years
An ocean of needles
and too many beers.
Playful smiles
Colorful walls wrapped up like gifts
Evenings of laughter
Car rides that turned to roller coasters
Just one month ago, you were walking around.But now you're dead and buried in the ground.So much can change in just the blink of an eye.You went too soon, forty-eight was too young to die.
It was late one night.
Driving around, not a care, I felt so light.
Oh my! I was high as kite!
While I thought I couldn't be bothered, my friend let out a holler.
"COPPER!"
Oh my! What a fright!
Drugs were addicting. I suppose I enjoyed seeing everything and feeling nothing. Though I did kind of feel alive - to be staring into the face of the Grim Reaper. He once wrapped his hands around my throat.
Gil Scott-Heron
Question,
Did you ever realize who the biggest kingpin is?
They say real eyes realize real lies
Well the Revolution will not be televised
So, I was sent to open eyes
Punch, punch, punch.
Make it a very deep hue,
This is something you need to go through.
Cut, cut, cut.
Only if
These Tears You Caused
Were a pathway
And these drugs I did made a sign
Then Maybe
Maybe you would be in my life
Life is shit; Life ain’t fair
I don’t even fucking care
Grab a drink; pop a pill
Pray to god that this will kill
Heart Is beating; trouble breathing
I am sweating and I’m freezing
Being a child is a special time
One in which you look up to your guardians
And think - I want to be like them -
As strong as my father
And as kind as my mother
We sit around in circles telling stories of the past.
Some of war, some of love,
some of loss, some of laughs.
We sit around in circles smoking cigarettes till they’re butts.
Clutching to our memories
Pressed to glass, like fine China,
A face I thought at once I knew,
The wonder years are all behind her,
Ripped apart and birthed anew.
She had me feeling dead
I was in the floor with all this red
I just wanted to be with you in my twin bed
I take these drugs cuz im misread
Cuz thats all we know what to do instead
Bumps of ketamine.
Go to bed real late.
It’s not what it seems,
Hell is a soulmate.
Vodka made of tears,
Down a bunch of shots.
Chased by cavaliers,
Try not to get caught.
She is screaming, yellingHer voice is so compellingThe fear is ragingThe anger that I'm cagingSend me to anger managementFuck it I can handle thisDie from a heart attackI can have my mother back Your illSo addicted do them pillsThrow it all away?T
The darkness behind your eyes was deeper than the surface could see
Your pain and suffering was consuming you inside and weighing you down underneath
You sent many signs
I don’t even know where to begin
My whole world has collapsed
I feel like an unwanted sin
How do you tell someone you’ve relapsed?
The pain I see in my friend’s eye
The immense guilt she feels crushes me
Take another.
How much harm can it do,
really?
Drink me down like water.
Skip the slow sips,
guzzle down the burn like
setting fire to your chest.
Everyone's an addict.
We were young and I was so high and I’m so sorry.
I was always so high.
I am always so sorry.
What people fail to see is the chance to be free,
The power to be more, the chance to open doors.
Like a locked cage inside where the pain won’t subside,
She’s tired all the time lately and her head is always cold
She just wants to sleep but everything is uncomfortable or aching
White grass
Gray ground
Yellow flowers all around
Wide eyes
Head down
Hid behind a small frown
One hand
You’d take
Try not to be back late
Brown clouds
Orange sky
I wake in the morning,
And the first thing I do
Is start to get high
To not think about you.
I take a long puff
To forget about your sorrow.
Take another one in
To forget about tomorrow.
No matter how late we came home on a winter night,
there were always enough lights to see with;
Lemay Ferry Road is always busy.
That was long before the
monster named fentanyl
snatched my cousin Mikey
Worst of all.
Better than the best.
Feels like I'm flying when I fall.
Will I rise to the test?
Super highs.
Deadly lows.
White lines.
White smoke.
Picture this:
the two of us, in bed
white sheets, black holes
No, blown pupils
we can't stop staring
There are two of me
The first me – the real me – is a good kid
Does what their parents ask, be nice to everyone,
never push the limits
The second me is a lost soul
A body with missing pieces
I push away my problems like
I push the smoke from my lungs
I'd do it for honor
If only I had some
I see myself crumblin'
Have you ever been so cold, you could not sleep?
Have you ever been so cold, you could not eat?
Have you ever been so cold, it hurt your teeth?
I've been cold.
-PoetrybyRileyAbbott
Everyday I regret the nicotine that I inhale,
I've tried to pray- but the thing is "I'm already in hell."
Going to sleep is a pet peeve, with a consequence of bloody snot when I sneeze.
Smoking weed was relaxing,
It’s supposed to be a fun night
Dancing with friends
Hitting on strangers
Having a little too much to drink
All of these drugs won't do shit,
not one shot, not one hit.
I'll still wake up in the morning,
wishing my life wasn't so boring.
I don't wanna get high or fly,
I just wanna fucking die.
What If I was rich, would life be any different, would consequences of actions remain the same. I know I’m not one to complain but if only things were different, if only I grew up in a mansion with a pool add some money and that’s fashion.
Her eyes blaze with guilt,
and an outrage at being guilty.
Being caught.
I patiently wait for the crows,
who so lovingly printed their feet
Ain’t about that life, ain’t about them drugs
I used to be and i wanted to snort coke
Wanted to smoke weed like a hood rat
Didn’t though cause i was too scared
When I was growing up I had a pretty happy childhood. I came from a broken home, however it never was an issue for me until I turned 12.
Dear Drugs,
You're popular in my community
Yet from you I have immunity
Maybe it's just because of my brain
For I know all you bring is pain
Or maybe it's because I know
Dear Jesse, don’t get high and stay in the sky.
I thought about it more, and I realized it means don’t die.
"you still kick it in the slums ?
you still sell drugs ?
you still like to party ?
you still binge n get fucked up ?"
I remember every piece and every bit like it was yesterday
Hurt me to my soul hearing bullets cought you 'round the way
Stayed on my toes for some hours, yeah I had to pray
Sitting within the four walls,
like a flower that newly budded,
I reminisce on the thoughts of
happiness.
How unachievable it was, the
thoughts
Like heaven's fallen angel,
…ADDICTION…
I CANT IMAGINE A LIFESTYLE OF GETTING NO SLEEP,
THE IMAGES IN HIS HEAD AND THE DEMONS HE SEES,
THE DEVILS BLOOD IS WHAT HE SHOOTS IN HIS VEINS,
You can't blame me for the nights you went out. I didn't claim to save you from that needle when you behave the way you do.
Our days were filled with long walks straight out of reality
While the cold wind blew on us, and I trusted that you were more than what they said you were:
Angry.
But the stories we told filtered the air
Picture cartoons, Sunday morning papers,
the scratched lines of Garfield, and high notes
of Mary Poppins. So if I told you
I know your brain is wired in a way that makes you think everybody
within a 3 mile radius hates you, is annoyed by you or thinks you’re a lazy cow.
Were you too misinformed to see clearly,Of how they were destroying your own soul?You opened your mind to them so simply,As if there was not a blood-l
I’ve got couple bong rips
Held with a deep grip in my lungs
Yeah
I got a couple slits
Not just the ones that cover my eyelids
To pepper,
you had to be so spicy.
so
tasty
Small doses turned
into numbness
My sister
ate so much
salt in
her meals that
she forgot what salt tasted like
Bumps of ketamine.
Go to bed real late.
It’s not what it seems,
Hell is a soulmate.
Vodka made of tears,
I drank the poison,
And became addicted.
You warned me to ease off of it,
Then you went and flipped it.
You became addicted to my addiction.
But when I lost my supply,
You made sure I got high,
The hill in Hawthorn Park was notorious for attracting stoners ar night,
They linger at the top,
Out of breath from the hike,
And take a drag from death whilst sharing stories under the stars,
late night talks
and hazy thoughts
live like it's our last night
pour another shot
shout out our worries
and cuss our angers out
sing random songs
and cry our pain out loud
My father and I are one in the same;
according to some.
He hates math,
me too,
but I believe there are more similarities than not.
After all we have been through and got.
Medications, prescriptions,
Trapped in his own asylum
Letting fumes take hold of his lungs
Booze takes over his brain
Like a video control game.
Midnight thoughts
Rake at his mind
Like jubilation
Being exiled.
Did a good heart get you far
As simple as it seems
Did a good mom get you sharp
As simple as her seams
Did a good heart feed your soul
Or did it starve you to death
Everyday that I awake I thank the creator for the day then I brush my teeth with toothpaste and wash my face.
As I pray for my sake Lord my soul is yours to keep, guide me through this day and keep me safe like a sheep
Leaf falling down a tree
A whole life attached to a native bough
Clingstone to freestone, pinnate to palmate,
Persistent untill the wind sets it free,
Far from crown it goes now
Hate's leaf scar on its state
About 3 months ago, there was a depressed girl in college. She was depressed because her mother was dead and her father was a drug kingpin with a different chick.
Crazy how one hit can take you in,
you just get so in to it.
once your in you can't get away,
even if your one love comes
you can't get away from drugs.
Addictive enough you can't go away,
See I don't know what went all wrong
i don't know if I did wrong?
you confuse me with the cherry
i thought I was a strawberry
but I don't know what went all wrong?
you chose to stay young
Once upon a time, there was a teenaged girl on a vacation with her sister, mother, and father.
After running out of data and battery, Alice's iPhone needed a charger.
Oh no!
Today was the day
You murdered a whist
Who stole the skunk
With your own two fists
You have blood on the bed
And brains on your shoes
You must drive yourself
You grow up understanding,
Until the day you don’t.
You grow up knowing,
Until the day you won’t.
They tell you that it’s easy.
They say life is a gift,
That love bridges the rifts,
They say 'follow your dreams',
They ask you to come clean.
But what if life is greedy and shallow,
Driven by heads and hearts that are hollow,
It’s amazing how you have the ability to cut me down and bring me to my highest of highs,
In a single sentence, you have this uncanny ability to remind me how small I am.
My body is no longer tied down to this rugged earth
by limbs too weighed down by darkness.
I'm floating. unfeeling, nothing but air.
The usual chaos has stopped its storm
Why do i write about drugs so much?
Is it because the addicts are my type of people?
I'm addicted to their homely touch.
I forget death is their sequel.
Limitations on my lungs,
America the beautiful, the broken
The late night party, he takes advantage
When she wakes up, she feels the damage
There are no repercussions for his evil deed
There's a party,
Everybody is lit,
Drinking and Smoking,
Posting pics with their new outfits.
Party in a mansion,
Tables turning with red cups,
My team need a coupple hook-ups,
The war on drugs still rages on
In the slums of harlem, the slums of detroit.
We pride ourselves on a free market but the most
Free of all is one we do not allow.
Please forgive me for what I have done,
This weight on my chest weighs a ton.
The life I have I fearfully regret,
But what I've done I'll never forget.
My arms are scarred here and there,
Heroin
Here and there, there and here,
Whats left for me, because life's unfair.
Kill myself as i push you away,
Stab myself as my heart goes astray.
Alcohol for the first time
Alcohol every weekend
Alcohol every free-time
Now the drunkness came to an end.
Weed for the first time
Weed every weekend
Weed every free-time
The levity left holes in me,
dreading waking, dreams forsaken,
teams are faking, but we're waiting
as we're fading with the ratings,
while it's raining, not containing,
life it's draining, with time we flee
Building up fire and ragethe past few daysfelt like a dragon trappedin a too small cagein and out of realityI phasewith an acquired tastefor doing dopetill im damn near comatose
Having a mental ilness is like walking blindfolded in a forest
You can never rest, you feel you can count on no one
Because your brain tells you there is no one
It says: "You don't have any friend but me"
Ten was the first lie. “I’m not doing that crap, I’d never lie to you.”
Nine was the next fight. Slamming doors, throwing things, and hitting each other.
Roll her up
in the sheets of the night before.
Light her up,
watch her dance round your lips.
She can’t be good to me, they say.
Then why so sweet to my lungs?
Ten years agoWe met in school<br>I was a nerd with glasses<br>And you were overweight<br><br>High school found us much the same<br>I was no cooler, and you were no thinner<br>But you had my back, and I helped yo
Blitzed. I hate being questioned. I see things in a blur, and I can't do anything for myself. I avoid. I have stronger fears now than before, and I'm in a void after being held down. Things change, people change.
I look back at pictures of our childhood,
sweet grass in the curls of your chocolate hair,
bright silver eyes that pierce the soul,
pale skin, sunburnt by the constant sun of summertime,
I can't grasp the concept of death; how someone can be here one moment and gone the next.I didn't think a fragile needle had the power to take the lifeof a man who fathered my cousin and had a wife.
HELLO BOYS AND GIRLS!LETS HAVE SOME FUN!While your parents are drinking,play with this gun!A game of Cops & Robbers.SHOOT AND KILL!OOPS!! You have a Boo Boo?Here, take this pill.
It's inevitable that at some point in life, we all become cold, whether it's for a week or a lifetime, we become cold.
But what is being cold? Being cruel? Sad? Distant? It's subjective to each and every individual.
The sun may rise everyday, Birds may sing,Flowers may bloom, A perfect picture of life.Tick, tick, tick,Time moves slowly when you're nervous.Nervous about yourself.Nervous about the pain.Nervous about what they’ll say today.Anxiety builds up insi
You left me when I needed you the most, you died when I was so young,now you're just a ghost.
Everyone's high these daysSmoking joints between classes That we can only afford by sucking dick and taking names because we are up to our armpits in college debt and drowning in self worth issues but when I'm high it's alright I don't have to thi
1.
It seems like you have to do drugs to write nowadays.
Maybe if I do drugs, I'll write a book as popular
As The Perks Of Being A Wallflower
Or Naked Lunch.
2.
The feeling of withdrawal kicksin and I'm desperate for a good high.The best selection is the company ofmy dad because it hits quick.
I woke up in a squalid room. My head is aching and I can't remember anything from the night before. I'd taken too much oxycoden, because I tried to lessen the pain of my life that has gone to shit.
The world I live in is hazy,
The life I am living is faint,
There's a whole world inside my head,
Coming into reality.
I walk around in the haze,
Hand on hand, skin on skin, touch touch
Sliding in your fingertips, touch touch
Blood is sauntering, energy is wandering
Both through the passageways of my veins
I awoke to a loud bang as my room was filled with the
Flashing blue and white lights.
This was normal in my life because my parents loved to fight.
My father while high had beat my mother because she was a "bother".
Grass is greenier with bumble bees
Depression goes away with some Hennessey
Bonnie and Clyde were together to the very end
You don't even want to be my friend
The alcohol and drugs don't mean a thing
In my early 20's,
When I was a simplistic University student of the Law,
One of my less popular professors
Romanticized dinner table conversations,
So much so I felt,
That the apex of my life would entail,
I stagger through the gate and my daughter comes running,
“Daddy! Daddy!” she screams running into my waiting arms.
I lift her,
I throw her up in the air,
I see her flying,
I want to break her fall,
I write from a place that holds secrets
Sex, alcohol, drugs, you know what the deal is
We all lock it away to get a taste of freedom
I just got out of middle school
Finally free from there
But now have woken up and realized
High school is about here
So now I get to deal with
Adult like drama
Instead of Jake is dating Ella
Day is not for
drinking, drugging or dating.
Night is for
neglect, nicotine and nakedness.
Revel in the
rambunctousness, rabidness and release.
Wake in the morning with
It’s so hazy in my head.
I don’t even care about my daily bread.
With you in my arm I am ahead.
As long as I get my hit,
I don’t care if for a year I don’t eat.
It erases my problems in a second.
“Drugs”
8:00, where you at with the good convo
I’m waiting patiently but maybe I’m pushing for pronto
I’m addicted and I’m hoping that you can follow
Listen on SoundCloud: soundcloud{.com}/jake-gillespie-6/god-bless-the-pen/s-q80Qg
(remove the {} around the dot-com)
When I'm high I like to eat fruit. Grapes mostly in the late night as I listen to my badu or rain Forrest and meditate.
Every beginning has an end
and every enemy was once a friend
deception the act of making someone believe something that is not true
the act of deceiving someone
She screams in silence,
But no one can tell.
And her experience with hell,
Has her contemplating self violence
She sobs to herself.
Her superman, her father,
Dies, her life forever altered.
B is for the beer
that im pouring down my neck.
the E's are for the easiness
how easy it is to get.
R stands for ruined
thats what im gonna get.
P stands for the pills
I can stop at any time,
I don’t need it.
I just want it.
The needles, the pills…
The crystal, the shrooms…
The dust, the dragon…
My tabs, my acid…
My herbs and my rock…
I like the warmth,
Picking up the bottle The stinging taste Burning you're throat You feel the heavy liquid Rolling over your tongue You roll the joint next to you You light it up and take a puff Coughing uncontrollably from the toxins Your friends keep telling you
Lucy -
My love, what a rough day I've had
Take me into your arms and hold me tight
Don’t let me go till the morning light
Mike,
I met you at a rave after months of feeling so alone in such a big place
You made me feel pretty
You showed me off to your friends even though we had just met
As a past drug addict many people ask me what LSD was like… but…
How do I explain the rain to someone who had never felt it?
You've felt it hit your skin
Mike,I met you at a rave after months of feeling so alone in such a big placeYou made me feel prettyYou showed me off to your friends even though we had just metYou made me feel cared aboutWe became best friends and started spending every second t
The Zombie
Drug addiction is an illness.
Associated with a loss of wellness.
It creates a zombie, ghost, immune to emotion.
Immune to devotion.
I guess the reason I am the way I am
is that from a very young age
my vision of the world was
cracked
from sleepless nights
until dawnless
mornings.
I tasted my first sip of alcohol at a very
They tell me I'm an addict,
They tell me I have a problem.
I have no problem!
I don't need to be here!
I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time!
They're trying to get me to open up,
Getting away,
Getting happy,
Getting social,
Being yourself,
Expressing yourself,
Keep it secret,
Only I deserve to be high,
No one else understands.
It feels so great!
I never realized how much I was missing out on life
Never realized I was still in the night
You found me smoking a cigarette and you reached out your hand
Why me?
Daily rageJalapeño hateSons burn my eyesCradle my cockI’d chop it off if it weren’t necessary for children.It ruins my life.Such a sensitive sensory.Thinking with my dick
Late night conversations make you learn a lot about the people you thought you knew,
with liquor savored on our lips, and the night sky above, everything seemed infinite.
Shadows,
Acrosss the field,
Across the meadow,
Across the lawn and across the room,
As the adults yawn and the children snore.
Lollipops, gumdrops,
Nightmares and blessed dreams,
I’ll get you high if you want to take the climb.
Ten thousand steps.
Explode, land mine.
Watch your feet.
Ecstasy.
Poppies asunder put me under;A slumber bathed in deep, dark umber, Oneiroi aplenty approach me there;Company where there exists no air. Poppies given to me by you;Poisonous mixture, a warlock's brew.
She was tall and thin,
old and grey.
When I looked at her my blood ran cold.
She had been kicked & beaten,
battered and bruised.
Her name was midnight,
Smoke fills my nose.The sweet scent tempting, calling me closer.
But no! Stay away, your mom and your dad are finally proud of you."We're glad you didn't end up like your brother."
You were just my brother
Every morning as I'd get out of bed
Mom and Dad in the kitchen holding coffee mugs as they shake their heads
"We've tried everything we could"
"The rehab hasn't done any good"
Use useless using user,
Used by your abuser,
Uses only to be used,
The kind of clarity that leaves you confused.
Tattoos made with stick and poke,
But there’s no ink in needles filled with dope.
I knew someone with an addiction.
It was a horrible conviction.
He came in black and white color.
Every day,
Every party,
Every line,
Every shot,
Every girl,
Every pill,
Every joke,
Every poem,
When you look at him, he can feel his veins burn up, he can feel them grow weak as his blood grows stale.
Blood
Sweat
Tears
My blood is spilt for your sacrifice
Dirty to the touch
You are sick with delight
I miss the way you’d get my heart going, the way you’d make it skip a beat,
The way I wouldn’t even cared if I died with you, dying so happy wouldn’t at all be defeat...
they say learning is meant to be fun and make you happy
but i can't really remember it ever being like that.
it's so cliche and worn out to be complaining about it
but i can't really think of anything else to say.
Your scent is my drug.
When I inhale I am brought back to an unreal reality.
The way you touch, feel, and sound
Comes to me like a car accident on the freeway.
Fast, hard, and uncontrollable.
Tell me I am nothing
That's what everyone else does
Tell me that I am crazy for falling in love!
Call me insane, because that is how I feel
being in love when the love is less than real
I'm sleepy
I wish someone would carry me to bed
I remember falling asleep In the car
and waking with a pillow beneath my head
when the world tasted like chocolate milk
now it tastes like bile instead
Well I had that damn dream again.
The one where you come back.
You show up at my house,
dressed to the nines with roses in your hand.
I can’t do this he doubtedI can’t do this he shoutedLetting out all his fear and anxietyA bubbling mess of insecurity and sobrietySwirling aroundAnd around
i watch you fadeinto the nightof formless shadowsshapeless sins
they swirl around youbefore the strikeof deathly terrorsshrieking fiends
There's something wrong with my head.
I don't know what – Just that it's hurting.
It doesn't usually feel so full
That it's fit to bursting and burning.
I’m drinking on this rooftop patio; bitters and absolut and citrus and vodka and ginger, something sweet to mask the alcohol, on the rocks, maybe in a champagne glass.
Along
time
we
go.
To
where?
I
do
not
know.
But
swift
is
our
motion,
commotion,
and conversation
about
timeless
The time has come my friends,
for stories to be told
for bridges to be sold
and hearts grow cold.
Dark caresses
between sweet fingers.
These smoke rings I blow
shatter the crisp clean air.
Intoxicated by the blood on your sleeve
I can't look away at what a frightening scene
you've clearly conceived.
Abortion wasn't necessary when your ovaries spit out
what may as well be your deadly diseases,
There's a river I know,
in the land of the dead,
where many call home,
and others may dread.
There's a city I know,
where the parties are gold,
where the liquor is silver,
All my friends are drinking their money
They think it's funny
Losing their money
All my friends are playing with marbles
don't think it's harmful
losing their marbles
All my friends think life is a party
Little angel once so pure
Now only called a failure.
Tried to fly only to be crushed
time after time after time.
He wants to touch the sky,
There was a month where I smelled like cigarettes. You were the month that I tasted like misplaced jokes, who's punch-line snaked around my jaw;
You told me I made you feel the way
I feel when I draw circles under my tongue,
but I'm not very good with new concepts.Driving the nails into the coffin of my inhibitions,
As I walked out one damp night,
reflecting neon lights,
breathing in the heavy smoke,
and breathing out my life.
Cracking earth beneath my feet,
At age 6 the world is full of adventure and
fun and you can make friends just because
you have a Barbie Jeep and Daddy's
always proud of you and one day you're going to be the
first person on Mars
The air reeks of the forgotten
Slowly sinking, wasting
Among them stand one
One not just one but two
One fades out the other fades in
It looks like it’s one but its two
A life full of struggles is one that I lived, they started off mild, only a kid. Getting bad grades and making no friends, these are some struggles that I don't pretend.
No one
Not even the rain
Can quite feel my pain
As I call out your name
And its a shame
That you left me in vain
While I crawled on the floor leaving a small blood stain
My daddy loves me.
Says my 2 year old self.
My daddy is coming back.
Says my 10 year old self.
My daddy abandoned me.
Says my 15 year old self.
I never thought he would.
But he did.
Where are you?
I know...
You are in a different city.
Why did you leave?
I know...
Because I did somethign wrong.
What did I do?
I know...
I wasn't good enough.
PUSH DOWN AND TURN.
Something quickly learned.
Sleep from a bottle.
Happiness from a flask.
Consume so much that I'm never coming back.
Numb my senses.
Fall in love with the drugs.
If I could talk to you one last time
I'd ask, "Was it really worth it?
Were the drugs really worth your life?
who am I?
I am a surviver
because I have seen the gates of hell
open up before me to hold me and keep me near
the needle in my arm was just a temporry fix of how I felt
First time, lets try to rhyme.
So i might not be good at this,
but hear me out, are you still reading?
I have a lot of doubt. K2 is a drug, that makes you bug out. Let me go ahead and tell you what its all about.
So here is a story about how I became oblivious to addiction
with a substance I've been told was something God had gifted
and a gift it was for a while at least
no sense of pain and time's existance just ceased
I'm lost and i been that way for so long, i bear the results of these years and i wear them as scars.
Mistakes made and good intentions gone wrong,
It is your best kept secret and your biggest mistake: almost like an incredibly attractive person catching your eye and then manipulating you to explore their territory and eventually uneasily stepping in.
College?
What does it mean?
A lot of experiences?
A simple routine?
The first year living on campus is always quite something.
You make friends, relationships,
And even some enemies.
*I have exceeded expectations and yet still i fall down.
People will leave you and you'll think that's fine.
follow me, soon you'll be all mine.
when you try and get rid of me you will realise there's no hope.
*my Only Friend*
I was the only one that really understood,
when everyone else left,
i gave you the gift of not giving a f***.
I made you feel strong,
wen infact you were weak.
i helped you to disconnect,
The monster took over his mind.
Leaving him with nothing but the thought of drugs.
Everyday I lose more and more sight of him.
Standing here by myself with no way to help.
The monster became more important than me.
I know a girl who was raped
RIpped from her concious state
She was drugged.
She was above the age of concent
But still underage by the law.
He was an adult.
Guess that goes to show,
He put a razor inside my lunch pale
Along with heads or tails
I know he's hinting death
As I hide behind my veil
Need a pair of clippers
To cut my cutthroat nails
And I red pair of scissors
Have you ever seen anything so sad?
Children run around half-naked while their parents wait for more pills to come to town.
Teens walk around with cigarettes in their hands and alchohol in their systems.
Make a list of all the things in your house that can kill you.
Have you ever had someone tell you they love youand then tell you it was a lie?
Abandonment seems to be the necessary process for existance.
Bleach.
So tell me how you spent your family's money
on cheap cigars you couldn't quit
Tell me how you destroyed your room to mask
the pain in your heart, but you couldn't forget
Ghetto babies rap their own lullabies because mommy just can't seem to hush their screeching cries
For the love that lies within the cracks of her arms that enjoy being kissed by the needle of her one true love
A faint mysterious cloud rolls overhead.
Darkness comes along leaving room for regret.
Memories engulfed with tiny drops of rain,
Slowly warning this is no ordinary day.
I want for you to tell Christ
That his quick glass is almost up
And the moon’s light
Shall gleam (shine) on all of the four corners
Residing idly in the room
Where the devious shadows lay
The truth wasn't true.
The facts aren't the lies.
The truth isn't true.
The secrets are held in the eyes.
The truth will never be true.
The evidence is something a great mother denies.
Without a care in the world I stare at the lens in front of me,what has become me
Behind the lens you will find the real me, not the one I appear to be
It's inside out, without a twist of doubt whats becoming of me, you see
One time I got some coke that was real funky, wet and chunky, turned my nose into a rubber hose that couldn't find the end of a line--
Another time I got this:
We all have dreams, though most seem to never prosper
We all are sinners, nothing can save this gospel
The pigs we gobble, the devil we follow, the poisons we swallow, all lead to evil bethrothals
How are you just going to get up and leave like that?
You're only seventeen, what are you gonna do with yourself now?
You went from a child who tried in school to a girl smoking pot just to feel cool.
Addiction. Is an evil thing
He’s your friend but he’s also your foe
He holds out his hand waiting for you to jump
Up, up, and away searching for that thrill,
Don't know where to find it relying on the pills.
All I need is one more high to get me through my day,
Oops here we are again huffing on spray paint.
Do you feel that?
That feeling of pure satisfaction and highness?
Oh, how I love that feeling.
The feeling of the liquid being push into my viens,
Notice all the old folks, hear them say
What happened to the kids nowadays?
Sitting on their ass, shorts way too high
Lying, cheating with pants down to their thighs
This is the age of the young, wild, and free
Nothing EPIC to write about, clean and sober. Wondering just how much longer until this hell is over. No visions of riches no dreams of fame, no delusions of grandger and nothings the same. The pounds I put on are supposed to be healthy.
I left her. Afraid scared and alone. My guardian angel needs me. I didn't know my heart was her home. I felt I could fight alone. But I proved I'm weak broken and a wreck. I didn't want her to see me use, I always hated that feeling of regret.
Some people smoke weed to distract their mind how they feel,cause they don't wanna see the truth, but soon they'll notice it hit's hard and real.A lot of the time this is just for fun,
I know that you have been locked in there
Where? You can't tell, locked is all you know
Intoxication by substance,Abuse is a common word inA user's dictionary: vocabulary,Mundane feelings of pain,Take it all away.
The patterns of life are so lost
Just fragments and reflections
20 bucks but no cost
Kneel down and say your confessions
Once again I find my self
Kids are dying
Younger and younger
By their own hand
They're being pushed to the edge
And they can't return
They feel alone
And helpless
And have no where to go
How many kids have to die
i lost myself
in my blanketed tomb
scars on my wrist
and pills on my tongue
couldn't breathe
although i tried
i tried and tried
You left gane forever
Was it by accident or choice
No one will ever know
You left behinde many people who care
You left me upset and scared
Was it because you thought wed be better oof?
I turn on the news
and all I see is ISIS this
murder that immigration this
Got me addicted like novacane, sitting here numb without a feeling.Tried to retrace my steps with a little sexual healing.
When I used to look in the mirror, I would see
A girl who struggled, but yet was sometimes pretty.
I struggled with my relationship with my family.
Although they clothed, fed, housed, and spoiled me,
Alone and isolated inside my head, I begin to wish that I was dead.
Fuck this life. I feel like I've already done this twice while overpaying the price. Well isn't this nice...
Sweet crimson
Staining drops
Make the memories
Crystal finds the glimmer
In the darkness of this hole
Her fragile body
Blackened by lethal injection
As I drive, watching my city streets roll past me
I see the tear stained faces of broken homes
And children being raised by strangers.
I see the garbage cluttered streets of SE,
We hide behind a mask of lies
To keep the truth from waving "hello" and "goodbye"
But have you ever cried through blood shot eyes?
Hit after hit, on that emotional high
Have your lungs ever hurt so bad,
Late nights, early mornings
Staying up for days
How can you ever sleep?
The drugs keep me sane
Judge all you want
Finding myself with every hit
How can I not love it?
I used to to an addict with a bad addiction
Now I'm one of a kind, a limited edition
From being locked up with no sense of direction
Now I'm on full blast like an adrenaline injection
I am in a room
alone
Full of friends here to help
me
As they move place to place, I
remain
succombed to any new help or
change
Because the small white ovals are already working to
i wake up in the mornings with a smile on my face
that is suddenly erased
the moment i step foot onto my school campus
the people that surround me
couldnt give a damn about me
Minds are crippled from the so called cure.
The doctor says "here take this" now people are passed out on the floor.
Your friends think its fun to take, your parents think skipping doses might be a fatal mistake.
i never thought id be that girl who falls for bad boys
but when i saw him
my stomach churned from the anticipation of his
enticing smirking mouth
and deceiving blue eyes.
when i spoke to him,
Tea on a Sunday
evening
Two young girls
hide behind their words
their illustrations
small talk eludes
dark realities
too afraid to address
the monster
in the closet
I will be damned, before I live a day without you
You could send me to the other side of the world,
and I would still come back like I always do,
Why you felt more confindent harassing me alone?
You called us friends, because you thought it was funny to see me crumble.
I only smiled because mouth had malfunction and fail to say STOP!
Have you ever felt that hollowness inside,
That feeling that no one understands you?
After hearing of emos and man-periods,
The really not serious descriptions of depression,
he's a man
but really
he's sarcasm
lanky, underfed, patched whole with drugs.
he scares away crows but he doesn't
scare me. I'll pay for this later.
but sunsets sitting in a haze of
I'm hungry, but not for food
Instead I'm hungry for the drugs that fill my stabbing emptiness
Drugs that make me stop shaking, but only keep me waiting
For someone to understand it's a part of me
This poem is directed towards my eldest brother... who has been on a heavy drug addiction for the past year. He has a 5 year old son who he barely sees and has got himself in a lot of trouble with the law.
Hour Glass of Tracks
Woke Up with my legs open
and my mind crossed.
"Boys sure do like me"
"boys like me"
"like me"
"me"
Boys like to suck me dry.
my being, my spirit, my soul;
"Ayo Cuz Scrap These Drugs!"
I Dont Play That.
I Think Not While I Wear My Thinking Cap
"Stop Playing Cuz Take These Drugs,Roll em Up And Catch A Buzz"
That Was My Man
I Showed Him I Can Stand Up For Myself
your slowly intoxicating my head
no words can describe what has been to my brain, fed
your slowly intoxicating my mind
arguing with myself wether your feeling is healthy, or if im blind.
Sitting in this car I can’t move my hands.
Go check my facebook, I bet I have some fans
Sat me in this chair, ready to tell my story.
Before I said a word their jokes told it for me.
emotional calousses and psychological imbalances
there's unwanted inhabitants in my mind's inner palaces
i never fathomed this like a sudden heart attack kicks in
i need to relax, sip the jack, numb the madness
What happened to back in the day,
when the grown men would teach the younger ones to behave.
But now we look around,
and men of all ages and races have their pants to the ground.
But thats my generation.
I never thought I'd hate something as much as you
You take away the good people from the world
You make them want you more then anything or anyone else
Those with hard enough lives you make worse
The strongest man endures the darkest days
But to endure does not mean that he simply
Takes
And
Growing up- Broken- BeatenActing like nothings wrongCan't you see I'm crying- hurting?Acting out just to see your longface staring back at me.See that look in your eyesHow much you wish that
This is my secret
I have not told.
This is my secret
I don't wish to hold.
This is my secret,
it will ruin my rep.
This is my secret
and my very first step.
This is my secret
Light another cigarette,
maybe I'll find happiness in the smoke.
No,
instead I'll scream until my throat bleeds,
and run until my lungs give out.
My tender body—anguished and ailing—
Fighting drug addiction
Is stuck in a dreaded destination,
A place where people lose themselves,
Where yearnings go unanswered.
to breath
to think clearly
to share
to shed light
but not to be heard
beacuse that might
open doors that i want to remain closed
he fights like a brawler
instead of finding discipline
he has cops called on em...
she lays hair like a duck's back
instead of finding school
at 17 she holds 2 babies heads back...
trying to control my brainwith square shaped drugs and filtered canestrying to obey the lawwith red stained teeth of broken sawstrying to prolong my lifewith cheap-seat bikes and gloveless fights
I'm the man in the sky
I watch you with my hazy eyes
Take my hand I'll set you free
Step into my reality
Here there ain't a ceilin' with walls
Take a bite of the poison
It’s the fate that you’ve chosen
Eat it slow, swallow fast
The point of this is to be heard
Among a crowd, one reads my word
My story and struggle one must listen
I think I'm gonna be sick
But it's not because I took a hit
It's because of the way I felt
I don't feel that way anymore
I stopped loving and you started
you are hell
but I am addicted
I am addicted to so many dangers
but you are my favorite
you are slowly killing me
but I do not mind
Yes, You are a drug to me,
a sweet live shock to my veins.
Your after taste so bittersweet, Your always on my brain.
I yearn for that heavenly necture,
Just to hear Your voice.
If a child throws a fit in the store,
If a man drinks, drives, and wrecks,
If the rainforests are being depleted,
Causing my brain to diminish or maybe my mind really is going or is my mental health truly my own worst enemy.
How did I get here? This isn't who I am. I've lost every God damn moral even ones I didn't have.
Some people dont deserve the life they live
meet tanya
shes thirty-six, with three grown kids
saby fathers absent
claimed that they aint his
so he up and left for his next mistress
Like a puppet with ripped strings I hang limp from a tree that is rooted in bad seeds. I have no direction and no recollection of anything but the present. Everything else is blocked out and I always want to shout.
Pools of blood
encroach the den,
the mother whimpers
when she realizes her son is near-dead.
Lifeless, pale, motionless on the floor,
in his own waste, crumpled to the core.
Needles of misery
Not everything works
Like it used to when
We were young
Disease fills us
Disorders rot our minds and
We’re never cured
Anxiety creeps up
Fire that you ignore but
Can’t put out
I am not
a junkie, a dead beat, a loser
I am not
a pot head, a lush, a crack head, or pill popper
I am not
a boozer, a drunk, a tweeker, a bum
Backround: The girl’s family has had a lot of problems. Still trying to find her way, she has to deal with her family’s problems and mistakes daily.
She stands on the corner, barely 18
Hasn't showered in days but waits
Waits for a man who needs an illegal touch
The body of an adolescent becomes tainted
She looks for independence on an incredibly tight leash
The Animal inside has changed
Grown timid from the drugs
The light bearer gives once
Is it because me and my gurl dropped out
Our sophmore year of high school, for
becoming 16 yr. parents?
Was it us taking that risk?
Or was it life we decided to miss?
My images were distorted,
a played out fiction book of torn pages and darken memories.
A scripture that I will never forget,
Red is the color of the sun as it rises, warm and spreading across his face.
Blue is the color of his eyes, the same as yours, as he looks up to you with pride.
You'll never know
How desperately I always wanted to grow up
When my parents wouldn't let me act up
Only telling me to hush up,
Cause the kid I was, was never good enough.
The alleyways are littered with broken bottles
Bleeding amber liquid
A fixer
Another boy pulls the trigger
And paints the dirt with
Something blue
John, you were young and free,Fearlessly you fought when you did not agree.You were reckless to a fault,Had your knowledge come to a halt?
You saved 'em from the knife, from the pills, from the booze
From slaughtering a beauty and all they had to lose
All it took to rescue was a few innocent words
A reassuring smile was the most clearly heard
I’ve seen the promising become promise-less, helpless, useless
A straight A student taking a straight edge razor to prescription pills
To heal the hell until she fell
Drowning neck high in alcohol
You can smoke all you want, the high won't last enough to taunt.
Snort it all up your nose, you know how fast it goes.
Inject it into your arm as if it won't do any harm.
I turn on the shower head along with my thoughts
Which are often not my thoughts at all
My mind has been infiltrated by society's thoughts
And everything it has taught
Should I really be distraught about all this?
run little baby girl, let the wind and the sirens comfort you as you go, run as fast as you can, get as far away as you can
it's okay, it's not like the others will ever understand
Slept in again?
My night habits are getting the best of me
And you're not the man
I imagined you'd be when I was young.
I can't just blink the fatigue away; I sit there for a minute.
What's on my mind?
What about what's in my heart?
What makes it bleed and break,
cry out in despair,
what makes me try and want to rip out my hair.
What I think about when it gets dark,
Life's a party,
One you can never leave.
So live it up,
break it down,
and never regret anything you do.
Because in the end,
it makes you who you are.
You had it together,
Remember?
Your fate comes
From a pharmacy.
Sanity is for no one;
For you.
Why must you
Insist?
Insistance?
Dependancy.
Infantile attempts at
It was always the rush that was the best part:
That feeling of surreal realities as they brushed past my consciouness, tempting me further into a smoke-filled oblivion.
I never wanted to leave.
Concerned hand
Shoots up
Riddled with
Purple tracks along
Vein’s corridors indicating
Another kind of shooting
Eyes glassy yet aware
Functioning child
Unknowing of what his
The wait was always the hardest,
Once I got a hold of you,
My heart raced with anticipation,
Of the feeling of you.
Your eyes were the flame,
The flame that heated the spoon,
When you pass down the streets in Chicago, Cleveland, and Atlantic City, you see it in their eyes.
They’re not yet sixteen, acting eighteen,
Driving their moms up a wall when they don’t come home for supper.
I feel like crap cause yea, i relapse
Relapse~to fall into a former state
I guess i fell back into devil's trap
I was just a his susceptible bait
Change Change Change, All about and all around
But it’s the wrong kind of change.
Earning the blessing to be a pharmaceutical scientist…that is probably one of the most selfless things conceivable to me.Every day on the job will be an effort to eradicate disease.Tuition,SAT,GPA,SSL hours?
After my study
i met this hottie in a
baby blue hoodie-
That said fear the D
but she said she likes me
casue I go to UIC
And still working on my degree
I date catholic school girls
In my house enjoying a fine day,
smoking cannabis, harming no one and nor,
am I doing anything wrong, but yet it is a crime,
and to this I say, end this war.
Medicine for everybody including children,
Welcome all to what I call my imagination, quite a unique thing let it fill you with facsination.
But there comes a price to this talent you see, care to take a guess or let me show you what I mean?
If I had the power to change only one thing
I would know the answer without having to think
I would stop all the innocent from being slaughtered
Their blood staining the world with red
It is the peak of a mountain
Looking out onto the snow covered waves of rock
Inhaling the clean crisp air
As a single bald eagle soars above
It is the clear night sky uneffected by ambient light
Pu Puff Puff Pass *Smoking motion*
Pu Puff Puff Pass *Smoking motion*
It's like a jungle sometimes so I just roll that Tropic Thunder
Roll that Tropic Thunder
I stay high to keep from going under
Pills,Pills,Pills,A pill for all your ills,Pills,Pills,Pills,A pill for all your feels,Pills,Pills,Pills,For broken bones and broken homes,
My stomach growls and hisses
Each breath I take angers the pits of my belly
My intestines secretes restlessly its enzymes
Urging me to feed.
The beaten path that lays before me
It's not just one time.
I know because you've said that before
"It's just one drink."
"It's just one hit."
"I promise, I could quit."
It's not fine!
So wake up!
I sent for God
To pass me another shot
With another round of rum
From his cup overflowed
My alcoholic messiah
Sick of sobriety
Sick, I drowned sobriety
There's nothing like that feeling of wanting somebody by your side,
Wanting to feel a touch of comfort by them,
A promise broken,You said you would keep me.You said you would stop,Mommy, Daddy can you hear me? A touch from God saved me,
Ha! Remember when you hit that blunt for breakfast that morning?
You thought you were on cloud 9 until you found yourself hitting rock bottom by lunch.
Forcing the pills, the good doctor prescribes
To children with potential to be the greatest of minds.
Parents say , “My kid’s waaay to high energy.”
ADD! The good doctor determines.
My abilities are beyond thought,
Take me and you’ll see.
If you attempt me,
You will never escape free.
Only try me one time and
I’ll think about letting you go.
But try me twice
Dragons do exist- I’ve glimpsed one
Flying overhead
But Camelot lies far away
From the confines of my bed
Dragons can breathe fire
To battle a raging fever
His voice booms and crackles
"This is a very intense poem that is true, and it is very sad and painful going through this.
Lighting up and getting high,
They think they're getting wings to fly;
But all inside is sinking low
As their minds to nowhere go.
Yet whose to blame when the only stars
They ever watch to pass the hours
Stacks, racks, cars, and hoes
Half naked women in videos
Unmeaningdul and unrelatable lyrics
Yet fans buy and supports
A lifestyle they could never afford
They don't understand what they see, no
My sweet escape -
My escape from the blows, the pain,
All of it,
In the form of a cloud
With a sweet, alluring scent
That drowns my conscience,
Inhibitions,
Common sense -
When we all were in elementary school
We were told “drugs are bad”
We could recite all their effects
We could tell you how they would kill
We could tell you what would happen
To your abused body
Alone in white she stands,
tounge knoted whlile she clasps her shakey hands,
Lies pour out of their mouths iike rocks in a dirty waterfall,
she gets tossed around like a used up ragdoll.
Is it that easy? You shoot up, the pants come down. You get your money’s worth. I’ll leave the gain. Rusty lemon types, sour and boney. Like larvae, comfortable and worry-free. Days tick tick, living under a spell.
I sit here, alone.
Eyes set to the ceiling;
thinking, too much. not enough.
Clock ticks, sand grains fall. slowly, fast, whatever.
Sleep doesn't come, eyes never move.
Open, close, who knows.
Living with this darkness. Always weighing me down.
Thinking dark thoughts; wandering around this strange and lonely town.
Can't get rid of this depression; seems like any hope I once held is coming to an end.
In my head : It's Tuesday eveningon a Saturday nightI'm not drunk,high or tipsyI'm just fine, trust me I'm alrightOne thing leads to another
6:50 AM and my alarm begins to buzz
Every day I rise to attend school but instead many kids my age devout their lives to drugs
Open your eyes; you may see them in the streets without any shoes on their feet
Kids are becoming thugs,
don't you see them doing drugs?
See them, smell them, almost taste it on your tongue.
Like an old toy,
Waiting to be played with again.
Collecting dust,
Thrown in a ben,
Taking up space in my room
Only fond memories prevent its doom.
But you’re not a toy.
I walk into this empty hearted hall.
My steps heavy, my chest hollow.
My core shakes with mourning...
Nobody knows I am forever stuck in tergiversation.
I stand before myself, under siege with my reflection,
I'm a 17 year old girl from Brooklyn.
When I tell people that I don't say it with a smile.
Instead I frown.
I look down at the ground that I walk on everyday
in Brooklyn
I fear for my generation
You see the smile plastered on her lips, dripping a story with a twist. Lies escape with every phrase, across your ears. You believe it's the truth she's laid. She seems like the perfect student, perfect girl; every strand without a curl.
Ha, my mind is a mess take away my struggle and relieve my stress cause this unhealthy relationship isn't at it's best. Full me with drugs and lets peek at whats next.
Cold like an icicle, melting stories from your brainYou don't know where to go, it's hard and you feel so much pain.
The first woman I ever loved
She definitely came from the heavens above
How else can you be so perfect?
The way you smell
Sometimes you even have those little red and orange hairs
Sarah
She was born into an orphanage
Her reading disability is awful
Her emotionally traumatized brain can't help it
Her life spent without being wanted
Justin
Wishes he didn't have parents.
time can't rewind,
though i really wish it could,
if i could change the past,
i most certainly would.
we used to be close,
actually best friends,
but drugs came into the picture,
Get me out of this placeMy heart breaks like glassLet it shatter and it runs a different paceIt's messing with my head, one minute i'm with you now suddenly i'm hereWhen will this end?
Hey you!
Yeah, you!
Loser!
Freak!
Slut!
Geek!
Are you the girl with the long hair,
The long-sleeved shirts and empty stare,
Who cuts herself 'cuz no one cares?
Life is precious, fragile,
and an amazing experience.
Memories last forever.
The good, the bad,
every important memory,
can never
be forgotten
Rolling around outside,
The nosebleeds of white,
The sickness of brown,
The sensation of Mr. E.
All of these and none of these,
Are ever what they seem.
Sleepless nights with snow white,
Eternal vomiting from a night of brown,
It all started, one night at the bar,
In the front seat of a parked car.
Do you party, a friend said to me,
Not really, but shit let's see.
Glistening in the moonlight,
There lay the white lines of destiny.
I wish I never pierced my veins,
I wish I never pierced my veins.
For this reason I'm to blame.
I pierced my veins when lonely and sad,
I pierced my veins when isolated and mad.
Am I here?
Is this real?
Please teach me gently
How to feel
………………………………….
Ive lost my luck
yeah, teach, i’m aware i have glasses. i’m
also aware of what they mean to you – quiet,
shy, high honor roll. it’s not because i can’t see
three feet in front of me that i’m in the
first row.
I asked myself, what the FUCK is education? A nine letter noun that involves complete concentration... I ended up searching the actual definition, the process of receiving or giving systematic instruction.
Hey teachers,
I was an eighteen-year-old senior, a hispanic female with the classic features.
I focused on what I needed to do but still got distracted.
But I was appaled by how some "students" and "teachers" acted.
for once I want to walk into school with a peaceful mind for once I don't want to be judged all the time for once I don't want to lose a friend, or hear of a murder down the street for once I want people to open their eyes and hearts that are ma
John Penrod’s Poem/Rap
Be drug free,
Come into class get your education please,
Boring I know,
Leave the immaturity,
Dont make me laugh
I mean it
I feel its rude
No, not you,
Oh I can handle you
I was taught its impolite to laugh at others
Your ignorance at my work
Your comments about smoking weed
Shutters forced open
To the vast unknown
By a pair of outspread wings.
She shimmers in the night
In all her breathtaking glory
Racing away from her only comfort.
She won’t come back,
We drank to fade awayuntil it worked.When the morning light painted the bodiesthat we were still trapped in,we fell asleep;too exhausted to carethat we still existed.
It’s music note coming at you
Throwing these facts down so you’ll understand where I’m coming from
I mean the point of me stating these facts
Too young
These two simple words always thrown in my ear.
Too young to know life.
Too young to feel fear.
You see me on the outside,
never seen me within.
You tell me i'm young,
I'm spinning.
Is this a drug?
'Cause I'm addicted,
Can never get enough.
Just one hit,
Yet, I'm craving more.
I'm either flying or falling,
Don't let me hit the floor.
What does it smell like
What does it taste like
What does it look like
It looks like death.
What does is feel like
What does it talk like
It talks like death.
What does it look for
They bring us so low
those seeds we have sown
Nothing left to show
Nothing can be grown
She says she feels alone in crowded roomsFakes a smile that is consumed by gloom.A consumption of pills are swallowed with fearShe fakes another smile to hide a small tear.
“The Fast Fifty”, the schools “greatest solution” to drug use and sale.
Yes, this is for a good cause.
However, the solution is a bad one.
Sure, let’s make these kids, maturing in the same environment,
Thanksgivng in Rehab
Another addict at The Lodge
It is myself I can no longer dodge
But what have these drugs really done?
'Tis the time of year for friends and fun
Close your eyes and lie to rest. Look at you, what a mess. Sleep all day, party all night. You're almost always out of sight. I just want you to quit, is that too much to ask? Since you're always gone and having a blast.
Thoughts of drugs swim through my head
I feel inside some burning lead
Right now im clean but I feel so hallow
I’m finding out how hard reality is to swallow
I miss my friends that brought me serenity
I wish I was famousSo I could expose your greatnessI want the world to seeHow much you mean to me
underneath the night sky we lay
while she swallows pill after pill
downing them with the stolen jack daniel's
we're holding hands as the stars blink
as if warning us we're losing a friend
Walking silently along this dreaded pathway,
Through the city of the lake,
i see all of these ghosts of people,
whose souls never cease to break.
i find myself shaking in agony
from these visions i behold,
When you look in a mirror, what do you see?
A smile, an eyelash, a splash of pink gloss?
Noticing her reflection, what does she see?
A short skirt, low-cut shirt, is she totally lost?
I remember in 9th grade
I saw my friend begin to fade
He had too much ecstasy
I thought, “How could this be?”
My pal, my friend, my brother
Now turned into another
What happened to this guy
Stretched in all directions,
a reflection of where you stand.
Left in, to fend with no defense,
horizons end is arid sand.
Tongue is numbed, a dry sponge
in your mouth on which you choke.
You're liquid
And fire
And everything I've ever wanted
You're pain
My misery
You move me like the waves never could
Teeth like silver blades
Eyes like poisoned honey
It starts off as a thought in your head that you slowly try to push away.As days and weeks go by it turns into a question that needs an answer. "Should I?" "Do I really want to?"
I used to steal everything
All my jewelry and perfume
But you can’t steal from a coffee shop
So that’s where all my money went
I knew a girl who took fire to her arms
I have green eyes
And brown hair
And a half hearted smile that I wear every day
I could be her
That beautiful girl in the magazine
The slender model on the tv
The woman I aspire to be
She wore red velvet; redder than velvet was her heart.
Gone were the nights of regret, she learned to cope with it.
She wore black leather; blacker than leather was her hair.
McKenzie picked her poison quite a while ago.
She never paid for drugs; instead they were her pain killers.
They were an opportunity to pacify her demons.
When she was high, she had no past, no present, no future.
He’d always wondered where she kept
her wings. And he questioned where she hid
her horns. He could never find feathers on her
boney, bare back and he couldn’t feel spikes
I see you,
It clouds your mind,
and you try to hide,
what is inside.
Attached to it,
Can't let go,
Refuse the help,
The need has grown.
You look at them,
They say that time waits for no man. But innate yourself and hold my hand. Allow me to teach you right from wrong and catch you when you fall. No one I've encountered had such beautiful eyes and a mind full of vision I need in my life.
it's been exactly
a week
since I remembered
what the scent of
your skin did to me.
and the truth is,
if I were in
a program right now--
some 12, 18, 42-step nonsense--
Pearls--blackly luminescent--fade
Under the burnt midnight oil’s parade.
They burn clear
Onto weakened corneas, thrown
Into sharp relief
Narrow is the passage that leads to your heartAnd as I search for your loveI never come close nor am I ever good enough to have itI'm still stuck out hereAnd looking in, I can see itAll that love that once was
Hi new friend
Tell me how ya doin’
Very pleased to meet you
My name is Influence
Do you believe in me?
I’m sure you don’t
But I’ll show you some things
Your parents won’t!
A certain level of joy when in love
One tragedy breaks the pure bliss
So easy: falling in love
But is it truly worth it
Here's something for you all.
My world is modern Technicolor;
vibrant, awe-inspiring, filled with wonder an special effects.
It is stunning.
It is my Xanadu
All I could dream for, and more.
It has been days since you cared about anything.
My only wish is to be loved by you.
Loved more than those circular pills that hide in delicate capsules.
I cannot give you what you want.
She's beautiful.She drinks, smokes and parties all night every time she can,No one has truthfully told her she's beautiful, She thinks she's not worth it,
Life lost, a lost life,
Youth wasted, a wasted youth,
Tired of trials, trial and error,
No end in sight, living in terror,
A slave to the night, always running scared,
she would leave days at a time
and leave me alone to care for them
a mother i wasnt
but it was a mother they needed
away she went to her world of drugs
and away i would go to my world of love
Chaotic
My mind
Spinning, telling, lying
How to convey?
Thoughts
Joslyn
My friend
Clawing, straining, losing
The war on drugs
lost
Words
For her
A virgin innocence beams under the spot light, shushed as the speakers buzz. A flurry of question bury the noise and a voice rises above. A blanket of awe wraps itself around the shiny toy.
A virgin innocence beams under the spot light, shushed as the speakers buzz. A flurry of question bury the noise and a voice rises above. A blanket of awe wraps itself around the shiny toy.
Listen to the wind
hear the song of the dead
watch them swaying
along the border
They fight for plants
a high like no other
welcome to Mexico
land of the dead
Normal is a horribly ugly word
It imprisons the people it labels
takes beauty and cages the bird
Diaries make for lonely companions
yet here I write my darkest words
As the shadows on the wall mimic phantoms
TEARS, rolled down our faces as we said bye to our mother
ANGER, seethed from us as someone tried to replace her
LIES, were poured into us that it could be fixed
YEARS passed and we moved on and were reunited
I remember the things i would do just to get high.
A trade here, a borrow here, an i owe you one to its for something important.
Just to get high.
Meeting strangers, sex for drugs, drugs for sex.
Just to get high.
As a teenager, time and time again, I am asked the question, "want a drink?" My response to the request always catches the others by surprise. Do I want a drink? To me, this question is so much more.
Dose after dose, taking me under. try to walk, I make a blunder. Down steep steps, my journey is nearing its end. Is there hope....for me?
brown hands that hold burned finger tips and tear drops that fall silently insidewith these words, can i give you love?with these words, can i be that handkerchief to keep them dry?
i take a trip to the beach at nightlet the sand pinch my toes and when the wind blows i get criticized for low eyes,
Acid rain
Crawling through your twisted veins
Stealing the eyes that used to see
The other side.
Now I've tried
I've opened my mind
To an endless possibility
The time I had a fever of a hundred-and-three, was when Ariel went out to sea. I was discussing with Prince Eric and Ursula about tea. The Mad Hatter's party was fun as can be, but the only thing horrid was the tea.
The time I had a fever of a hundred-and-three, was when Ariel went out to sea. I was discussing with Prince Eric and Ursula about tea. The Mad Hatter's party was fun as could be, but the only thing horrid was the tea.
The time I had a fever of a hundred-and-three, was when Ariel went out to sea. I was discussing with Prince Eric and Ursula about tea. The Mad Hatter's party was fun as could be, but the only thing horrid was the tea.
The time I had a fever of a hundred-and-three, was when Ariel went out to sea. I was discussing with Prince Eric and Ursula about tea The
Hey Dylan,
I’ve been here for you for a while now.
But for 19 years straight, you’ve been nothing but a villain.
Your love toward me, you disavow.
I didn’t do anything to deserve this.
With each puff,
Your everywhere
down the street
in my school
Your even found down the gravel road
You robbed me of my childhood
my dreams
even my sanity
Momma always warned me about you
Fire, light, inhale.
Breathe, obsorb the poison.
Deep breath, obsorb the smoke.
Feel The Addiction Take Over.
Breathe, obsorb the pain.
Deep breathe, obsorb the cancer.
Feel The Addiction Take Over.
ShatteredLittle droplets of my heartSplatter on the floorMixed with splintersOf my sanityI grasp the edgeAs I sinkMelting under thePressureA spoonful of acidReplacing the sugar
Answers aren't at the bottom of a whiskey bottle,
But misery is.
You're just a child whose been hurt,
And the world has hardened your heart.
Oh when the drugs wear out and the crash kicks in
painful glares pierce through yout thick skin
and it all comes down to who you are with in
not who you try to be, just to fit in
Feeling terrible
Melt your ashes on my tongue
Tasting them like nothing
I walk to walk, stiff joints crack,
Bone-tip
The time that knows no bounds
Knows them indeed.
I'm whiskey and sadness poured into a shot-glass
Swallowed down for the burn so you can know how long your esophagus is.
I am lost loves and hung-out hopes with the sweet notes of rum on your tongue.
Get Em
Get Em
Get Em
Party Party Party
Cups stacked along the corners of a torn house
Aligned like a house of cards, fragile
Reeking of booze, alcohol
Oops spilled some on the floor
Listen up you little twerps.
I’m going to give you some very bad advice, and just hope that it works.
If you should have an issue, just take a puff from a blunt and everything will be fine.
We drove through the evening blueness at a rapid pace,
streetlights and buildings blurring to join the smear of stars.
The moon was a sliver, the smirk of a watchful stranger
given to those who glance uneasily his way.
I will change, you say
But do you know what that means?
Are you really a man?
Go ahead, hit her again.
Maybe she will stay.
Maybe she will forgive you.
No no, not this time!
Allow me to set the scene
Mother of four
One of the most faithful dope fiends
To the Four admired as a queen
The oldest only 16
Father figure to the youngest 3
No help offered
Because she aint clean
as i look upon my heart
i notice all the deviations
some of which were mine to start
others were miscreated
I lay here writing the words I can't say
And the longer my mind fights wondering and wanting to say hey-
And the longer we go without a word, this becomes a never ending day
I am falling
in the breeze
I am choking
with no ease
I am whispering
in your arms
I am holding
your poor heart
I inhale, Smoke fills my lungs.
Leaving behind a bitter sweet taste on my tongue.
Bitter poison but sweet relaxation. Absorbing into my bloodstream my own condemnation. I try to fight it, but too strong is the temptation
Denial.
That was the first reaction.
Frozen: in a dead-locked stare
with a fluorescent, empty bottle.
Panic hit me like a whip across the face.
My best friend was the bottle.
My brother was the smoke.
I lived it up real good
Before life caught up and choked
Me out of my mind.
And now I see
That I was killin' myself.
Now all that I need
The fire in those eyes brings me to sudden silence,
The darkness beckons deeply; threatens to turn violent.
Life inside that mind must be eternal pain,
every word spoken as if it is in vain.
He was brought up in finest pride,
Desire matched all gifts,
Seized more than all a soul could need,
Much more than ever dreamed.
He laid there in his bed
Motionless, clinging to life by one single thread
His memories reflecting through his eyes
If only he had the chance to give one last goodbye
So tired and broken, frail and worn out
A young boy on his own
Thought he had no control
Felt like he was spiraling down
Falling, rocketing toward the ground
All I saw were lights flashing on my face,
Where am I going? What is this place?
Two men grabbed my body and lifted me off the floor,
And hurriedly rushed me out the front door.
It's One in the morning
and the Family be snoring
I'm On the bed thinking
Sleeping is boring
I had some coffee
I think had three cups
Or maybe I need to re-up
Cus the weed is my Nyquil
Deep moans drift in the room.
Liquid hunger screams from my veins.
Acid leaks from my lips.
Agony drips from my head.
I am wounded, and all I want is more.
more of her to heal my pain,
I look out across the dingy city.
Towers loom over the filthy streets,
the roads, broken, have no destination,
and the street signs, blank, give no direction.
Untamable
This space is cold
The name I chose
became the main chain-reaction to maintain with a brain too strange for the average face to smile at
so brace and don't
hate just cope
I came to hold
addiction
you run through my veins and consume my body with a vengeance
you take over me and leave me with no control
just the vision of my downfall for my temporary happiness
My father reeks of leather and old books
I love to smell that scent while we tattle
Society may call us paranoid shnooks
But we know they are only mere cattle
No good times do I know of my young years
She takes the needle,
shoves it into her veins.
Cries out for the sweet relief,
gives into the call of the heroin.
Life becomes tough,
becomes too much.
She throws away everything,
(poems go here)
What is a mother?
What is my mother?
What is she?
Can someone tell me?
No, well mom you tell me
Tell me, what I am supposed to see?
Is it perhaps love?
Well no it cannot hun
Relief.
That sharp sting lasts a second.
The vein inflates.
A hum of anticipation.
The cello winds through the body,
seeping through the eyelids
and turning an eye blind.
The piano means no harm.
Just one more drink you told me
Just one more pill you said
I wake up every morning
And expect to find you dead
From a bench I watched them walk,
all in a line,
the exertion of emotion dripping from each individual pus-filled,
black-headed pore,
twitching and moaning like dead men with gaping mouths and scarlet tongues
The door slams and my heart hurts
The inexplicable feeling of dread that permeates through my body as I hear another door shut
The sound is a trigger; the sound sends me back into countless times before
They say we're a drug school,
but thats only halfway true.
They try to stay cool
when they hear, "Hey, you!"
But when its not them, they continue.
Endless despair courses through my hollow veins
The hallways scream loneliness as I wallow in pain
The drugs of the night breathe, the drugs of the night breath
As it walks the earth people fall victim to the lure
20 and 21
So young, without cares.
She drove too fast
He hurt too much
Unexpected...
Death- something we avoid
Something we escape
They didn't
They couldn't
At a crawfish boil I cannot fully make peace
With myself because I have frequent flashbacks
Of spring break in April of 2005 when I waited for my big
Sister Tori in that red and yellow sunset
For 3 days straight
I lost someone
To a life of the unloved
Someone who brought untold limits
I lost someone to the heavens above
Pain…I must complain, it’s killin’… my brain Sore…doc, what’s the cure…Son, there’s nothing…more. Defeat…bruised and beat… that’s how we’ll…meet.
I miss the innocence in elementary
when we were k-i-s-s-i-n-g
in a tree,
you and me,
because I’d rather worry about cooties
than an STD.
You see,
when a boy liked a girl,
he could almost guarantee
I see faces pass me by. Faces that I used to know but they’re all strangers to the strange--they don’t know the world I know. I hear their voices, a whisper in my ear, telling me all the things I don’t want to hear.
you're curious , so you try it one time .
you can't keep falling down the crack line .
you keep falling deeper & deeper until you reach the bottom ,
see strange things that you never thought possible .
I am from the rolling hills of Scotland,
I am from the white sand beaches of Spain,
I am from fighting, tears, and divorce,
I am from a broken home,
I am from vicious custody battles,
My slowly beating heart
was ripped into shreds by your dirty hands.
That black balloon lifted you up again
and wouldn't let your mind fall back to the ground.
She used to be an innocent girl
But the devil has changed her
Staring in a mirror
The reflection is a stranger
She yells out to God
With tears running down her cheek
Praying to become strong
Plush, Red, Pulse
Thick, Smooth, Blood
Bouncing
To the constant beat
Pulse
Pound
Pulse
Somewhat sterile swords stab
Through your gates
Injecting foreign troops
You extracted all the good from your heart, and injected yourself into my veins.
As your love flowed through me I was overcame with a surge of euphoria,
a rush so powerful it left my palms sweaty and my mouth dry.
Waking up and feeling hope.
Hope only to be dashed by my own stupidity.
Letting myself fall far away from help
And drowning in my mistakes.
How do I escape it all?
Swallow another pill,
clink clonk
I sing as I
roll in your pocket
a reminder
I burden you
you want me
You need me
but you never get a chance
to keep me
I'd show him what he asked for
If he called me beautiful,
I'd take another shot
If I could prove that I'm fun,
I'd agree we were "just messing around"
If I could feel his love
On a night like tonight,
What if you got tired of breathing?
What if your next breath was just as painful as the last?
Would it make you faint?
Would you still wake and bake?
Alot of you kids
Don't realize the fate you make
Large boulders of smoke roll down your throat and coat your breath with the smell of false happiness. Yellow stained fingers cover a frequent cough. You sound more and more like your dog as the days pass.
tell me if those rappers never promote drugs would you be taking them?
have you ever asked your self is this really who i am?
tell me what good do you get from those songs ?
I live my life by a code
To never get drunk nor high,
But people think me queer or rude.
My code exiles me from the cliques,
Never invited to outings or parties,
Never asked to stand in the student body.
I should ink my skin
with your name
as a permanent reminder
of the places you've kissed
our bodies melted together
a clay sculpture
two beings
one body
molded together
You’re screaming at me but I'm not there to hear it.
I'm drifting away on fluffy white clouds as my world melts around me like a Dali painting and my fingers leave patterns in a sea of stars.
He was the color of tan skin untouched by winter's sun,but the blizzard lives on in his eyes.He uses the weed to get high because it's the only way for him to get up in the morning without her touch.
I lie on the floor gasping bsp;
“I said not to touch me, you’ll kill me”
I won’t die
“DON’T TOUCH ME”
She left.
She killed me
but she left.
No more wracking pleasure
Silence.
I'm feeling high tonight.
Not sure what it's from
Could it be these pills?
Maybe these cheap thrills.
I can't be sure.
Where's my waldo?
Is he in my dream?
My friends, I don't know.
He told me:
"It'll burn like nothing you've ever felt
Don't cough
or sneeze
or do anything but swallow the drip.
And you'll feel like a god.
I swear you will."
So he rolled up the bill
I get it now.
All the rock and roll artists
they don't do it to cover depression
or to fit an image.
Simply this:
it fuels your muse
I know what the world means.
Only I don't want to know
Strap me to the machine
and inject me with your facade.
It's the best we've ever seen.
It's the best they ever saw.
Brilliance was burned away
We drank away our thoughts
Gambled which would stay and which would go,
We didn't know.
Let me fall into the hole I dug
There is a pipe and lighter waiting,
Marijuana and a bottle of Irish Cream
Don't wanna surface
I'm not quite here,
not quite alive,
not fully functional,
fading into wisps of
what I was
once upon a yester-year.
Feel like I am crashing
from a glorious high
that I can never have again.
She sipping on some lean.
Popping all of them pills.
Smoking a bunch of weed.
While i just try to sit back and breath.
She said its just to much stress to leave.
And drugs separate her from realness.
All my life - I've been trying to find
Such a beautiful place,
Like the one in my mind.
Somewhere that no one else can trace.
Now here I am
Standing in front of it,
Not giving a damn,
Lost
In a sea of students
Flying low
Below the radar of the teachers
So low
Evading the eyes of my parents
Sliding
Deeper and deeper into the darkness
Alone
As we grew I watched you with ease,
A friendliness only siblings could share
But as you aged I watched that joy cease:
And in our friendship you seemed not to care.
In my maturity I saw your pain and flaws,
I. CONVICTION
Littered street corners
blend with the falling snow
like ash against skin
Their chants ring in my ears
as the cold air clings
and my skin burns.
Caw, caw, caw!
The crow goes.
Boom, boom, boom!
My heartbeat grows.
I stare at my window Waiting, waiting.
Fear enveloping my mind and soul.
thinking of a message
a message clearly
drafted in your writing
"I miss you, dearly"
trying not look up
or give a smidgen
of any of these feelings
I'm not taking they're just given
It's been a while since we've had our fix
Our release from this world were livin in
Our Place of solitude just to take that hit
To enter a dimension of ecstasy within.
What if everything was different? What if I wasn't gifted?
What if I just gave up on my dream and never tried to live it?
What if I'd paid attention? What if there was no addiction?
it’s 12:34
and i guess i’m just
a sack of skin
caffeine replacing
my endorphins
my happiness is busy
she’s gone,
running out my nose and
streaming out of my eyes and
When I think of you I say,
What happened to the way
You looked at me
You talked to me
Or how to acted around me
A mother surcomes to a metal piece of evil...
She is addicted to something so powerful,
It grasps her every desire
Burning every decision
Deep in these streets
Where it's easy to lose
One's self without warning
Where all hell ensues
Where death is dealt
Day to day
From one hand to the other
In a sneaky way
Where moms run amok
"Inhale the good
Exhale the bad"
These words are spoken.. as they rise to a dream of a life they wish they had
I try to understand..
Why there is such a strong need for this thing known as "weed"..
Or..
There was a boy, a boy I once knew.
He wasn't the best, according to you.
Yes, he sold drugs; crack and weed too,
but no one would judge him, not like you do.
Broken bottles on the floor
Cocaine dispersed out on the table
Needle punctured in her arm
As her mind remains unstable
I watched you destroy your life
I could’ve said something,
I should’ve said something.
But no, I said nothing…
Did nothing.
Instead I watched you throw it all away.
You had a future ahead of you.
The first time
I held you
In my arms
I chose
To love you
Unconditionally
Even though
You were
Tragically addicted
At only
Four precious days old.
One can never see what goes on behind closed doors.
All you have is the insight from a young, bright-eyed girl, who just wants a chance.
A typical suburban family is not all as it seems.
Fake chains and white Tee's,
pants hang low to our knees,
but we got to keep making this cheese,
So we surviving up our own community,
WE,
chop that crack,
WE,
sell that weed,
WE,
Here goes the under goer bypassing and shedding skin into new light that was only evident between seas of shadow. But as oppose to the useless struggle traveling into void of confusion.
