tobeheardscholarship
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"You can be anything you want,"
They sang to me on my eighth birthday.
You can be a doctor, a musician
Or a happy astronaut.
And I believed all that they said,
And that night in my bed
I feel it in the pit of my stomach.
I know the feeling quite well.
It’s really good at festering
And yields bitterness
Disinterest
Disdain
A little bit of hate
This is a small excerpt in the perspective of Elliot Rodger before he went on a killing spree.Reader discretion is advised. I took complete liberty in making up his perspective (so be warned).
Silence is golden.
But talk is cheap.
Does that mean the quiet are rich?
And the social ones weak?
Then why is it that society
Places the price on the head
Of the one with a smile
And an empty head?
I am dead inside but when the beat of music hits me that is when I realize I'm alive and full of happiness
16 years have gone by, and the words
"You'll be lucky if you even make it to the end of the year,"
never seem to get old.
Support? Barely.
Friends? Few.
Family? Whenever they feel like being family.
Living in this world full of mystery
Can't take this pain anymore
I'm tired of all this misery
My blvck mind goin crazy
I don't know what has gotten into me
To Those Who Cannot Speak –
Let it be known that I hear your voice,
Through the wrinkles in your skin and the quick motions of your hands,
Sound is not the only choice.
Tread lightly, for the glass is fragile,
and when it shatters,
our feet will be shredded,
like the pages of a journal,
visciously torn out,
when the author can no longer bear to read their words
This generation-we're underestimated.
We sit, watch, take in, tweet, gram, filter, like, endlessly, uselessly!
Endlessly the underestimate us, call us useless.
But are they right? Should we be underestimated?
I question if i am making the right decisions..
When i look into those tearfulled eyes
My child
I have walkd thro hell with you still growing in my womb..
but why is it now
Sometimes the walls around my heart have a little crackOut the gray bricks flow colors and feelings;
She needs a person. She needs a person to tell her deepest secrets to, the ones from the heart.
I met you when I was three
You use to be special to me
You became something like my number one
You brightened my world, like the moon and the sun
You were perfectly imperfect, and that was okay to me
Games of the heart are not easily won.
Is there victory when the battle is done?
Loss of blood will occur on both sides.
They say that love is a battlefield.So do you feel the beating of my heart every step you take in combatDoes the dust in the air create silhouettes of my face,Do you try to feel the embrace of my arms
don’t wanna be your darling some fragile little puppet following your every command
I am no child
I am an investment.
I am no human
I am a number.
There is no love
Only obligation.
And beauty
is but a broken compass of the heart.
What makes me tick you say?
Its the help I say.
Financial help is what I crave
Student loans are what I grave.
1000 dollars is a lot you see.
it can help me pay off college for at least my bachelor's degree.
Tell me something
I want to hear —
like
She
is still here
in our world
laughing
with that tigress grin
an infectious echo
of character and grace
We are engraving in the young the way to survive.
It may not appear that way to most but the human race has evolved
Into benefitting himself in the most lustful and cruel ways.
Darling, when did the blurry claims manipulated youto focus on distorted idea of perfection?You started noticing the smallest flaws
Sickness, poverty, nations of the illUncured, losing the battle not at will
Nations crumbling beneath our feetNations tearing at the seams
I’m tired of playing this game that seems to go in circles.
With me thinking I had gained the title I strived for.
Level One.
Level Two.
If you would just believe the way I feel for youThen you would understand the pain I'm going throughIt feels like shattered glass scraping across my skin
I've been hard at work since I graduated,
I pay for my school, my rent, everything I've created.
I've kept up my GPA, joined a few clubs
Traveled abroad, and avoided the pubs.
In all my life
I have always been the little sister
The baby
Not anymore
Please stop saying that
All I ever wanted was for someone to hear me
I tell them I am no longer that girl
Rattling off words, i often find myself pondering why I let you in.
I spark back at you any words that quickly
flow out of my my mouth...
But why?
What for?
As if you came looking for me.
Fluency is not as easy as it seems,
Rolling off the tongue gently and slowly,
Spilling out of the mouth.
Spewing out of the closed chops,
onto a blank page.
Blanknes tends to tire the restless mind
I'm thankful for you mom
You always say you love me
You always make me calm
And wipe my tears so I can see
I was drunk with feelings
Lost in words
Thoughts escaped me
With speech unheard
Sentences unformed
Letters not expressed
Anything to keep you close
And not put thoughts of you to rest
I would never explain the first moment I felt it
and I could never reveal how it was the first conversation we had
because even if I did admit it
Outside I'm good, inside I'm bad
Loving the memories we never had;
waiting and waiting for me and you
throught that door you to come too.
Living my life, I want to be full
The parade comes marching through the town
Knocking on windows, tearing our black shrouds down
Beating their drums in merciless rhythms,
Only then do we notice the apparent schism.
You are the forbidden fruit,The forbidden wordThat had me mute.My habits were absurd.You had me lieAnd owned my silence.I had to abideBecause you were the tyrant.
He’s finally coming to visit
Everyone else seems cheerful
I feel worried, more than anything
After all, it has been two years
The day, finally here
We meet
We smile
We grew up and old like vines,
growing along the same trellis
our stories weaving together in a heap of curling photographs and triggering memories
crossing back over the same twenty or thirty times we saved each other.
Listen to me! Listen to me! My childhood is gone--long gone, not lost but stolen.
Trying for the relationship I wanted,
I copied my father’s moves and emotions.
Genetics helped out, only a little.
Father, What have I done to myself?
Gripping, pulling, plucking, repeat--
Close your eyes
dream
Open your eyes
live.
A dream,
it can be the start
of a life long adventure.
Some people dream
and just let it be.
Some people dream
and set their dreams free.
I am not a poet, but I write to be heard. I write.
I write with knowledge. I write with power. I write with conviction.
I write to be free. I write to lose myself and time and the world.
I write to be heard
By the little corner mouse,
Who sits sipping tea serenely in her trap.
I write to be heard
By the angriest hornets,
Shattered.
Like a piece of Mom’s good china set that never made it back,
Back into the cabinet.
Shattered into pieces, this hollow muscular organ lays
In the pit of my stomach
Red colors the back of my eye lids as warm rays beat down on my skin. The crisp tropical air hugs my body as I stare at the sun and can’t help myself as a smile slowly creeps onto my face.
I don’t want to be heard.
I want to be listened to.
What’s the sense if the listener doesn’t comprehend?
Or want to comprehend
I need to borrow a pair of well used ears
To be heard you must raise your voice. Let people know you are here. Have your voice reach its highest point. Let the people hear what you've got to say. Never stay quiet. It lets them know you are small.
There's quite a lot I'd like to say, but I keep it in my mind, 'cause it would hurt someone: maybe you, maybe me.
But this is a harmless platform, so I'll let them out (my words).
First.
This is for my hero, the one who gave me a life and a purpose to fullfill.
This is for my hero, the one who saw me when everyone else was blind.
This is for my hero , the one who overlooked my sin and saw me for who I once was.
Threw it all when You lost it all
Threw the cause you find a way
Just to let us know and say
I'm with you today
And when you are beaten down
You get right back up
When you try
You never give up
I have heard it before,
how men do not notice eyebrows,
that they do not care for plump lips
weighed down in red lipstick.
They say that china-glazed eyes
belonging to a dumb bunny
Beauty is in the eyes of the beholders ,
Not in the eyes of the negative talkers.
Try to avoid those people for they are walkers ,
Walkers among valley of death , negativity.
The world is filled with aggressivity ,
I don't know where to startOr where this will goBut there is so much that you need to knowThree years have gone byNot a damn word from youA hello, how are you, I hate you...What is a "daughter" to do?
My wounds have been reopened, the blood of life draining from my battle ridden corpse.
My emotions more drained than an empty bottle of juice.
My life fading as I see my captor standing at the threshold.
Like day time
In the dead of nigh
The goodness of the world
Shining so bright
So strong you can hardly see
So powerful
You can hardly breathe
Leading the way
Good communication is when one understands
And gives feedback to another.
Their feedback may be answered
Differently on ones sex or color.
Good communication should be
All I asked for was time. Time
To mend the gaping hole in my back
From where your knife groped its steely
Finger from my hot, pale flesh, reaching to
The open air. All I needed was
Time.
"Around my way, you better beware.
Cause once you locked in, you may never leave here.
My city is the realest, killers are different leagues here.
Every night bullets hit home runs, major league man.
Warm blood, beer bottles covering all corners of the street with red lipstick kisses from a girl’s pale lips. The streets reeked of despair, grief, the smell of dying flesh as each teen puffed a cigarette.
There are moments in time when a sound hits your ear drums before your eyes reach the sight,
and moments in time when your nostrils fill up a familiar fragrance before you catch sight of the body of which it lies upon.
this
is a moral lesson
(you would do well to listen)
what does that mean?
none of us have
the slightest clue.
(look it up) (I don’t want to) (I’m not an encyclopedia)
I sit on my bed with the blinds half closed, wondering why ; the people of this world try to be so cold and crass. Don't they realize that life is a journey, that goes round and round , just like a clock that goes tick tock.
Am I invisible?
Am I merely just thin air?
Or am I a fool who has a fool inside my mind?
A magician, a joker, a poker player,
And everyone else.
It is our job to have a different face for everyone we met.
I write for all the things I should have said and did not,
To scorn you for all the hurt you caused me,
And for solace, comfort, and peace.
I would say that writing is
bleeding from the soul
a release of ideas from the back of the mind
an escape for oneself
where judgment cannot take its toll.
And this is true in some ways
but
Love.
It comes in many forms.
The love a parent has for their child.
Instant.
The love a dog has for its master.
Unconditional.
The love a sibling has for another.
Growing.
your words, they stingjust like a razor blade upon my skinsinking deeper with each cut you slit
we've all loved
We've all lost
But all can be found
We'll all live
We'll all die
We'll always strive
For better or worse
To love and be loved
We'll find whT was once lost is now found
The pain in the pit of my stomach made me die a little more inside
I don’t deserve to be treated like this is what I’ve began to realize
Too many chances turning into lies as I give them away
What gets me inspired?
Damn, I don't really know.
I guess this prompt has been really eye opening, though.
I'm just sitting here with some writers block
If I ever do anything creative I'll be in shock.
To be known in a world of lost souls,
means nothing if you have no goals.
When we walk outside of our comfort zone,
we find that in the road to success you can be alone.
With negativity comes a life of sorrow,
The life that we praise,
what we call a perfect one,
is not within reach,
but the life we call our own
is just as desirable.
The sound of shoes scuffing the floor
echoed throughout the hallway.
A black hood encases her face,
hiding her from the world.
She keeps her head down,
One word with so many meanings
Haikus, sonnets, snaps, songs, freestyle
More than just words or styles
Self-expression
Wanting to be heard
to be Heard
rip opEn the chest
And feel the emotions
Ripped from your lips
hear Me, oh future, oh past
hEar me, oh children born, old men dead
Now is the time to act
Ashamed of the mouth,
That appendage who never obeys my will
Or rather destroys my will.
Draw the lips apart
Determined to tell a story
But the oxygen kills my plan
This is What I Am.
I write because I am.
My words flow from my mind.
To my fingertips
To paper
(Or a keyboard.)
I write for good times
Or bad.
I write so I can
Speak my mind
The outside of me is better than ever
But the inside of me is shattered
Shattered like glass
To not let anyone see that I'm shattered,
I start to play along
Looking as happy as I can be
When I was little,
An itty bitty child in an itty bitty house,
My mother told me:
“Now don’t you hate.
“Hate is a strong word, a bad word.
“Hate makes people weak.
“Hate drives out love.”
It’s a competition
One shot, two shot
Three shot, four
Drink all night
Until you drop to the floor
You think that it’s fun
And you think that you’re cool
But you wake the next morning
You see people still haven't grasped the fact that actions are louder than words that's why when they see these Instagram post then they believe them and Instagram said break up with
Lonely girl is so far up above the world. She orbits around, without an anchor to ground her.
When the tides change
I'll be free
to drown among my people
in the ancient lands of nowhere
nowhere you would go
with a head upon my hat
and feet upon my shoes
it's time to go inside
If I could be heard,
I would say listen.
Listen to the lost voices
And to those who cannot catch their breath,
The ones too terrified to scream,
i went to this party mom i remembered what u said you told me not to drink so i drank soad instead i know i did right thing mom i know your always right the pary is ending mom as everyone drove out of sight as i got in my car mom i knew i'd get h
We all return to dust at the end of the day.
There are a limited number of words you can say.
Once the time comes, you remain forever soundless.
Use the words you are given,
My thoughts are nothing but a rusty gate swaying in the winds,
but my voice,
my voice is power.
My heart is simply opended,
like a blossoming flower,
for the world to enjoy.
I am in a constant state of unhappiness.
In my unhappiness, the happiness is blotted out
By a blank state of staring at something that should, but almost isn’t there
No matter the form, color, or shape.
Love is not defined through all the red tape.
Who are we to tell another who they can and cannot love?
And still, my thoughts, they wander toward you
As I sit and contemplate lonely jazz poets and sulking homosexuals, free with themselves, but dying at the chains wrapped to their feet in a bubble perfection world
The sharp and the stabbingLike the shards of a broken bottleAnd its gleaming smoothnessLike the beads of a necklaceThey cut my stomach liningLuminescent- like stolen stars
Those were “my girls”, Those were “my niggas”.
I didn’t care about what no one said about me,
Stream of consciousness.
A fill of void and mess.
Generalizing my distress
in a field in which I won't digress.
Yes,
we are all in this world together.
She's got rock star style with that beauty queen flare.
She has my full attention with just the flip of her hair.
She's got a lot of class, I can't even deny.
Can you hear me?
Because you act like you can't...
That's why I stay angry
and I rave and I rant.
Can you see me?
Because you act like you don't...
That's why this pain on my skin
It is my serenity
My escape when reality is too much to bare.
Freedom among that unexplainable
And you are the guide.
You guided me here,
To this vast wonderland of beauty.
Stand up and Fight. Everyone is always standing around talking about whats wrong, but no one wants to stand up and fight for what they know is right.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately – about you, and the way you broke us off. So abruptly, so easily. Like forgetting me was the simplest thing in the world.
My child’s name is not Disability
He is perfect in my eyes
Able to do anything
Limits beyond the skies
At the time when I was youngI saw life and thought it beautiful.Never once thinking of it in depth,Never once asking it of anything.As life grew around me, so did I
Let's be like kids in the movies,
making dreams in the backseat.
Let's be like adults on TV,
making love in taxis.
The lone days of summer that alters your attention to yourselfSummerThe days that will last for hours and create new memoriesSummerThe season on which you will learn how to say goodbye Summer
I remember the first time I met you
so clearly.
You spoke in different languages
in my ear
to distract me as you put your
tongue against mine,
I’m afraid of myself
I’m afraid that I will never succeed
I’m afraid that my parents will be disappointed in my decisions
I’m afraid that the world will not accept me for who I am
As the tears rolled down her face, she thought she was all alone;
No one to hug her, no one to tell her that she is loved.
Her thoughts began to strengthen.
I speak with the intention to breathe a new life
But the stale air is all that you swallow
My words are a poison to self-induced ignorance
Your mind is full and yet utterly hollow
Disorder
I have ADHD
And ADD
And OCD
And a,b,c,d,e,f,g,h,I,j,k,l,m,n,o,p,o,p,o,p,
Oh my God I'm doing it again,
That was so fun!
She was craving for love.
She wanted to be heard.
she wanted to be held at night
and showed off in the daylight.
She gave her life for him
and sold her soul for his love
He lives in his own world.
I call it his Alternate Spatial Distortion or ASD.
Some days he is a little farther into our world,
Some days he is completely in his.
I watch him as he closes his eyes and smiles,
Look above me and you will find
An unfinished song forgotten over time
The notes are perfect in my heart they will collide
Placid water,
My reflection stands still.
Though my thoughts in my head,
And the emotions that i feel,
Run rampant throughtout me,
Beckoning tears to my eyes.
But no longer will i suffer,
Some sounds are echoes
Some are whispers
Some demand to be heard and possess your mind
Some just flow past you like a chill
Some sounds hurt you from the inside out and make you want to crawl out of your skin
I was the kid on the curb
never thought my words would be heard.
See I've been in a trap house since the age of 6
my uncle started sellin in 86'
my cousin started pimpin in 99'
When I'm upset, I conceal
I wish this wasn't real
Wither away, let nobody know how you feel
So love sick I may be
It hurts to feel, as you can see
I still have hope
Bare feet running down the street
Speak louder than the words shouted in the house
This is for all the kings without kingdoms, or queens without crowns.
For the people without voices, crying out from the ground
This is one voice, a tremulous note,
Sustained by the wind and carried by hope
Two minds, one body.
One heart for passions and ever-changing interests,
And a brain to make him like everyone else, a hard copy.
Black, Darkness,Ugly words that I heard from the movies I watched about slavery, This is all I am this is all I will be just another ugly dumb black girl with nappy hair.
She sits and remembers all that has past
The things that were said and every laugh
She thinks about how she heard what they were saying
But then she thinks about how she listened to her heart without betraying
Everyone wants to be heard,to tell their feelings and their hurt.But, yet they walk around silentwith feelings bottled up so hard like a bullet.
I encompass the mind of a young woman
A woman embarking on adventure
Finding myself in a world of beliefs
In a world of disbeliefs
Here in the healers castle the walls are high
For inside is where his great loves reside
Where in the walls
They are being showered with affection
And lavished with luxuries
As there hearts slowly heal
You said you would always be there.
You said you would never hurt me.
You said you would always protect me.
You said you would always be in my life,
No matter what.
You said you cared about me.
Three hundred thirty minutes
A jaunt taken with no regards for today
A moment of deep agony-
As blissful fragments of our
Memorable memories routinely recapitulate
This ability to hold in the mind
Look me in the eye and talk me what you think
Windows of one's soul deepen with pity
How could this be?
I am isolated with chains fiercely linked
Friends of mine roam the city
Why am I not out there?
