Isolation
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Loneliness is a cage
That confines my soul
It keeps me locked up, isolated
Out of reach and out of control
I long to fly, to spread my wings
To soar above it all
But the cage is too small,
Take me back
please.
All this wisdom has made me weary.
Like a sickness,
it's etched into my lungs.
And like rust,
it blooms between my joints.
"she has a heart full of hate and a head full of haze"
i heard him mumble
"but i can love her enough for both of us".
i coudln't understand then,
for who wants to love someone
The piece missing from every puzzle
And when found
I don't fit
Some will try hard
To press their thumbs
Jamming me in and out of every corner
Where I was not made to be
So many pieces,
When I was little
I ensured everyone I had the loudest scream
One that would shake the world
I could feel it brewing up inside me
Begging for an escape
But I wouldn't
Is my soul so lonely that one conversation manifests into an entire fantasy?
It hurts to know my mind will be preoccupied for ages, but I've probably already been forgotten.
Elderly man asleep in the hospital bed
Moving so slightly
His respirations become
the only sign
He is not dead
I move his feet back in the bed
as they slide out every now and then
for 22 hours a day i keep my teeth in and
for 22 hours a day i stay in my quaint little town
four walls around a caved in nest
patterned bees swarming around the outside
I worry for tomorrow, will there be another day?
I try to stay strong, but the pain won't go away.
We're consumed by this anguish, trapped in solitude.
Let's connect to reality;
turn off the electricity,
lie in the silence that
invades us.
I'll hear you for lack of
the other sounds that
made us
bearable, one to the other.
These Days I Stay... “ Elusive “...
While Some Would Say... “ Reclusive “ …
Quiet nights, quiet days
Upside down and so confused, what is happening to our world?
Alone and afraid, separated from humanity
Reaching for hands that cannot ever touch
Asking questions that no one can answer
When you look up to the sky with your sensitive, blinking eyes. The clouds look back at you with their ever-folding lies.
Big blind.
She hasn't texted back in two days...
I'll call.
But I suppose
Things haven't really been the same
Since...
My cereal bowl holds stale lucky charms and
Milk white atrocities
Bathing away the cobwebs
Of spiders better left alone
When years stretch away empty,
your dreams start to die.
Kicked often enough,
you forget how to try.
Things that used to be urgent
don't matter so much.
Friends drift away.
Somehow you lose touch.
A fresh page.
The reinvention
Of a long underappreciated discipline.
Empty miles;
A blank key;
No cardinal in sight.
You tell me you want to talk, but you don't mean it.
You tell me you're happy to see me, but you don't mean it.
You tell me I'm special, but you don't mean it.
The mourning sun: Helios
I bloom—vivid and bold.
Set in your sky,
I burn gold.
From my light—
A sacred gift—
Don’t tell me you know me
Because you don’t
All you know are smiles and “im okays”
You have no idea of the pain underneath
Close all the doors to the outside
Never let anyone in
Trap all the pain inside
Hold it there, take it to my grave.
i thought i did something that made you mad
made you hate the way i blink
or hate the way i shiver when it’s cold outside
i thought i did something that just
God is cruel, putting me and my emotions here with you.
I am the failing punch-line of an unheard joke
You are a center stage comedian
****Trigger Warning****
It’s like I want to tear my skin off.
I take a breath and hold it.
I can’t let it go.
Is there a point to all this?
Some sense of release hidden behind years of
Doubtful ventures into nothing.
Can I outstretch these fastened wings,
And search for some greater feeling,
In daylight around my peers
My stature and character becomes sharp as if it were a spear.
But everyday has a night
This is where my anxiety begins creating this dirty little sprite.
She stumbles in the darkness,
in search of the light.
But the sky had been empty for a while,
the stars could not hold on to it.
It is only her,
and the wind,
and the cold wetness on her cheeks.
Parted Lips
a-POP-olypse
The seats of the minivan burst into flame
as rabid fragments of monster carrots
feed Death while he
In a pitch black room
Yet there is no fear.
The thunderstorm and gloom
Yet there is no fear.
In a pitch black room
Yet there is no fear.
The thunderstorm and gloom
Yet there is no fear.
I’d like to disappear for a little while
To indulge in self-exile
Down a road
Long overgrown
To hide away
From this disarray
I'm not sure, I can take much more,
Living my life I'm not,
Things started out oh so promising,
Then I began to rot.
Tiredness and doubt fill my mind,
Even when there is so much to do.
His mood was short
The transient feeling was impermanent
But it became plentiful and copious
He was now fragile and tenuous
the uncertainty of this precariousness
Questions like "what happened?" or
"did you hurt yourself?" send a
pins and needles panic down my back.
Shut up - go away - shut up - go away
I can't hear you anymore!
You're all quiet to me now!
Darkness and isloation
the only two things I ever used to know
mind your business
hold your head down
don't let anyone know you are here
you exist
you take up space
but that doesn't matter
What do you see when you look at a photograph?
Do you see your memories from the past?
Do you notice the things you hadn’t notice before?
The sort of familiar feeling of falling
Envelops me like it's always meant to
An ocean that only goes down
Devoid of light and air and feeling
I find myself reaching
(The surface is miles away)
Dear Insecurity,
An incessant whisper in my ear,
Constantly reminding me of everything I fear.
In your unyielding cage I am kept,
When I’m judged every day evidently
And I come to think my mother was right How could I ever live genuinely
Could I ever be loved for just one night;
I don't have scars
I've never felt the tension
and the sweet release
a surprise so pure
and innocent
Breaking the surface
raw, primal pain
sharp breaths
Tangy, coppery
Bulletproof, she's just something you can't break through
Cold as ice, don't get too close or you'll get frost bite
She's fine china, with a wall around her you'll never scale
Everyone at school were assholes to him,
in a general sense.
The worst were the
meathead jock types.
The pricks who'd
call him a FUCKING FREAK
and then copy his chemistry homework.
i was 17 the last i spoke with my father.
he came
home that tuesday night smelling toxic,
with the world giving away beneath his feet.
bloodshot pinball eyes, carrying
1000 unconfessed sins and
Father is angry
brother is crazy.
Mama is worried
but sister is perky.
Arguing constantly
everyone hates me.
Or I don't seem to matter anyways.
I could never really describe the way
thunderstorms made me feel
It is a strange experience.
At first,
as the wind starts rising
and getting stronger,
I feel it inside me.
I pitched a tent at Kayoke
Among desert sands around
Grown tired of reg’lar folk
To wilderness I am bound
I sang a song so merry
I am the human embodiment of fear and trepidation.
My body is a reeking cesspool of panic so I lie awake in bed like an earthworm lay on cement and
rot
America is great,
Full of perfect people,
Speaking perfect language.
They say speak child,
you are now free.
For here is America,
the land of opportunities.
So I speak.
There was an earthquake at his core.
A warm, beautiful crack in his porcelain skin.
The fracture stretched from wilting lips
To the sultry caress of midnight breeze
I used to think that my cowboy boots and pecan pie
Were all I needed to survive
As the summers were filled with the Fourth of July and state fairs
A supposed sense of freedom was in the air
Live in your bubble for a day
Not for a lifetime
Look up and see the world
The world outside your own
That is the world you live in
Not the one you've created
The girl who had no feelings shed a tear
Her head still high
Her pride so empowering
Everyone knew it was no good for her
But it saved her alas
Her fists clenched to mask the pain she experienced internally
Seasonal criminal
How you strike when it snows
It's not something physical
You put on the shows
Seasonal criminal
Wrap me in a scarf
Wrap me in subliminal
Wrath, force me to starve
Since I was a little girl,
I dreamed of being a ballerina.
And now look at me:
Caught up in this twisted dance for fools.
I wished for nothing more than to have stage,
I signed my soul away with a 21st century John Hancock,
To get rid of stubborn, ages old writer’s block.
And now these trembling hands they do mock,
At my crooked fingers and smudged fingerprints they gawk.
Who am I?
No one sees me
They glance shallowly, right through my existence.
Who am I? Who am I?
I exist utterly in solitude
My own mind a mystery; I can't comprehend
Unseen
Unheard
how does it feel to float
float high
high
higher into the air
you feel free, don’t you?
you are a balloon
Your bones are the bars
encaging your heart
Your scars are the ink
tattooed on your skin
Markings to remember
Markings to forget
Somewhere inside the prison of flesh
Class call your name and stand off.
All present but one a good day for the some.
But teacher teacher I'm right here?
Assignments in with jolly and cheer.
Sweet little girl where is your paper today?
When I fet like I could talk to no one,
You were there for me.
Through my troubling thoughts and feelings,
I could open up to you, Poetry.
My smile always plastered across my face in public
The relative
I never understood you as a person
your twisted personality is
always taking sharp turns
into dark corners
An ache in your chest
Dunno where we stand
Happy memories ablaze
Standing hand in hand
Where it all began
Nobody can say
The end was unexpected
A world fell apart
On my own little island, there is little means of escape
I sit alone, on my nearly treeless home in the middle of a delta
My only neighbor, hardly acknowledges that I am even there
It's very strange,
The way some things change
As it all goes by so fast
and our poor hearts hardly ever last.
You were a part of my happiness
You don’t take me home.
I’m laying next to you
feeling the warmth you try to exhume
so profusely
And I swear,
I am nothing without him.
For he is who has me all.
I climb trees, limb from limb
To hope he catches me if I fall.
They say he is not right,
What did he do wrong?
If the world were to crash and burn,
And all life ceased to exist.
What would be my biggest concern?
What one thing, I could not resist?
With not a caring soul or a comforting sound
Ah, the...”age old” question.
If you suddenly became Tom Hanks
in one of the movies that he surely has pasted onto his résumé by now,
but you got to take one thing with you,
what personal item would you take?
To be completely unearthed is the beginning of where I find I’m free
and to realize that my life is for me
and to realize that I am who I should be
To be out of your sight and on to something far away
Alone on an island
Stranded and lost
Waves crashing and winds blowing
I do not feen for food or water
But for your love
Your company
Your arms around me
Gripping me tightly
Isolation at its peak
Abandoned on an island
With nothing to see
But water as far as can be
What would you bring
If it meant you can see
All the beauty and wonder
A journal is a simple thing, with lines, or blank.
Freedom to express yourself. I would bring a journal.
Documenting my life.
My turmoil.
My strife, my joy...
Happiness.
Solitude,
Though happiness is very close,
happiness is hard to find,
real, true happiness.
Everyone deserves happiness.
I had to start taking risks
without worrying about the consequences,
i wake up to pale sunlightfiltering through my pink curtainsstaining my eyelids a sleepy rosemy fingers wander to my bed framesmooth and white, embellished with seashells
I can see myself now
Stranded on a deserted island
Away from you
Alone.
I grumble at the sun
Hot sand stings my toes
The roar of the ocean hurts my ears.
Stranded on an island... I am alone.
In an osasis I find some peace, I am alone.
In the dark night without heat... I am alone.
Wading in the blue lagoon under the hot sun, I am alone.
Once upon a time,
In a kingdom far away.
There was a mistreated maiden
And to her dismay they teased bout her shoes and her hair everyday.
I'll let you in on a secret
So tell everyone else
My greatest weakness is fear.
But it's not just any fear, it's a disease.
It creeps and crawls onto every decision.
It beats me down into indecisiveness.
only my walls see my tears
and only my walls know my fears
i keep it all inside
except once...
when someone pried
i opened up and tried
but they hurt me so...
i nearly died
If I were stuck on a desert island and I think of what I’d need
I think a lot of people underestimate what they’d need to succeed
In keeping themselves alive,
happy, and sane.
will They find the body?
will She care?
Finally.
I can't get the smell out of my head
The lights dance, faltering
like they did over the shattered glass
Pretty face, heart not yet stone; run the world but feel alone. Heartless friends are what I know; if they care it doesn’t show. Always giving all my heart, always loyal from the start. Change my looks change my ways anything to make them stay.
When I am aloneNo one can hurt me anymoreNo one is able
To tell me a lieAnd injury my precious heartBut there is still pain
hands out
with your palms up
burned and bruised
as you're reaching for love
that isn't even there
arms aching
outstretched for so long
years and years
I've been staring at the ceiling,
it is off white,
and bumpy,
and very, very boring.
sometimes it is so lonely your chest feels like its made of glass,
Clouds begin to creep
I can’t stop the seep.
The sludge and muck
Seizes me, I’m stuck.
My arms go first
Seized by shadow’s thirst.
Insatiable, unstoppable
Misery’s quite probable.
I’m living with this unholy farce
Hidden so high away in the sky
Where the birds soar
Above our heads
Many maniacs have acted before me
Around me four
[Walls]
Surrounded by four
[Walls]
If they could speak
What would they say?
mommy, you're broken.
i hear you at night
your bottles are clinking
it fills me with fright.
mommy, were broken,
this family i think
the yelling seems constant
we continue to sink
t's 6:00a.m on the morning,
For a day that's prolonged, aggravating and boring,
You're tired, and exhausted,
These are the years of our lives that are the most awkward and stressful,
Come,
Sit down and view my world
Let me take you in
They say my name
As if it is I that should be ashamed.
And yet, I win another battle
When you’re feeling low…
and you feel like you’ve got nowhere to go
… that sick feeling is all I feel
as my head begins to reel
My vision starts to blur
A wolf alone in the wood,
Not by choice but by cruel fate,
A social animal without a pack,
A mind consumed by hate.
Will you not take in the wolf?
No, of course, no one would,
No one is looking for me.
I haven't disappeared, but why can't they see me?
That's alright, I'm not hoping to be found,
I already found myself
drip.
the showerhead cries,hiding my saltwater tears.
hot.
water trickling down,cleansing my soul.
scalding.
steam surrounding me,burning away the sorrow.
calm.
No one undestands what it means
To be alone
To be ignored
To eat your lunch in the library
Hidden behind stacks of books
So no one can see your shame
To look at your feet when you walk
We are creatures of information,
And so, we are creatures of communication.
I realize this.
So I write my message, read over it, and fix a few typos.
I roll it up and put it in a little bottle,
Oh no, I have nothing to hide.
Never in my life have I tried.
I have always been happy!
I will never be sappy.
Not that my parents bother me,
Nor is it ever a biggie.
All that matters is your glee;
“Still” by, GiGi Spata
Captured, trapped, broken
A mangled mouse in a trap
Like a beautiful bird in a cage
A precious puppy in a pound
There you are sitting..
Dazed and distracted...
Are you alive?
Can you hear me?
You've made mistakes...
You didn't catch a big break......
But don't stop trying.
Don't escape.
Life insists too much upon us
to take a second glance;
a second look.
We go through shutting everything out
and never realize what we could have;
what other people took.
The fires burn in the distance nowyet he feels better, some howGasoline and matches, his keys to freedom
Look up kid, the stars are still in place, the moon hasn’t left,
there’s no pressure there. So stay, watch the sky. Just, stay.
Don’t hide, the leaves are changing and the field is dead,
Take me to mars,So I can see all the stars,So high up to par, No need for fast cars.Alienated from this world,Just balled up and curled,Now and then wanting to hurl,Wishing I had my girl.
I planted you a rose; sat and watched it bloom
the rose didn't feel me watching,
or notice that I was trying to forget you.
Who do roses grow for?
Surely mine for you,
The castle walls surround me,
a magnificent beauty all around,
but not a soul is to be found.
I am alone in this wonderful beauty.
I try to end this maddening isolation,
Today I arose to find you not there beside me.
I don't know what part of me expected your prescence, but
Your absence disappointed me just the same.
Away, away
I will not come back,
remind me, yes
remind me of sin and wrong
remind me of why red so satisfied.
Confuse you?
That is the point.
It is both a curse and a blessing to feel things so deeply.
To take on the gravity of a burden or the flight of a fancy.
Both within herself and from those she cares for, as they live around her.
Afraid of a white suit and plastic hands
We succumb to the thoughts of midnight
Internal, we burn deep and scarred
We cover them up by the amber morning
Not understanding the source of these words
Am I going insane?
feels like i'm in another dimension.
Stop, get out of your head,
you have to pay attention.
Surrounded by your classmates,
but feel alone all day.
Dismissal bell means nothing,
How does one get away from this bottom less pit, of what we call "life"
In the distance, there is a house
A house that is vacant, and beautifully covered with
Solitude.
Happy thoughts don't exist.
Nobody tries to understand.
There's always an unkown twist,
I'm on my last strand.
I'm drifting away,
hearing the voices.
As the people try & pray,
Sweet mother, Sweet mother, do not forever flee from me,
I long for you tonight in the black flowing sea.
Please brother, Please brother, do not stow away from them,
I crave you in my deepest depressions. I fear you in brightest highs. In my midst of finding who I am and who I want to be, I get the sense of something going wrong. You call my name before I can even try to fix the broken pieces.
“Can I have that to go?
But why do I ask?
Time doesn’t go slow,
And I have no better task.
But we are always running,
Away to better things.
Our aversion is stunning,
A tear falls down.
Just one, then two.
I hang my head to hide my face,
But I know he stiffens, closes off, turns away,
Avoids seeing me as he makes his rounds.
Round and round the papers go,
Racing mind and nonstop motion
Shaking legs and bitten nails
Painful head and shortened breaths
They tell me that I'm crazy
But I don't think I am
People whisper about me when I walk by
Sometimes they even stop to stare
It doesn't bother me much anymore
Not like it used to
Peaks of good and bad
Patterned patches of plaid
Life clenches us in its hands
We must pay for what life demands
For if we do not
LIfe will leave us out to rot
It can loosen its hold
Some call it crazy,
Some say it’s sick,
but I think it’s freedom,
the pain is fierce, but quick.
Some say that it’s a sin,
just a little to risqué.
But it helps to release the pain
Life is a prison
Won’t someone let me out?
There’s no one around
To hear when I shout.
Climb the walls of insanity
Jump into the pit of despair.
If I fall it won’t matter
My toes touch the edge,
I look down.
I see the darkness
beneath the ground.
I look up,
searching for light.
All I see is darkness
deep in the night.
In a life full of sorrow and strife,
The only thing I want to do is hold the knife.
The knife that cuts, the knife that scars,
The knife that stops most of the wars.
The wars inside, the fights on the out.
We are surrounded by people and things,
By those who are chained and by those who have wings,
By those who love life and dare to dream,
And by those who are scared to even be seen.
I tore the words "Once Upon a Time"
Traced the letters "O" "U" "T"
Folded it up all nice and neatly,
Kept it in my breast pocket for my heart to see,
Then the words caught fire,
They fell away to ash,
The Quiet Room with its white, padded walls.
Sometimes I wish they were a different colour, any colour at all.
Sometimes I wish there was noise, even the most annoying noise in the world.
Through paper thin walls,
I watch as you slowly fall,
With your kness down to the ground,
And with eyes downcast, I can hear every sound.
As the clock ticks away the time,
You don't know me.
Not like you should.
Not like a mother should.
But how could you when I've shut you out?
Having been broken too many times.
How could you know my heart
When I've hidden it so well?
Her lips get blacker and blacker,
And the more they do, the more she masks them with red lipstick
She claims she's got no worries...no regrets,
but she suppresses each grudge as she inhales another cigarette,
We are His child.He knows our name.We ask, "Why?"He replies, " Hush my child."We don't understand.He holds us in His arms.We've failed.He loves.
Everything is overseenWind blows through the treesI see the gleam from the rain drops on the leavesThe grass a shade of greenSo peaceful So siren Grey clouds stream In the sky
i just need to vent .
this life is suppose to be well worth spent .
but as of now it makes no sense .
arguing and fighting and throwing a fit.
but really is it worth it ?
While holding her belly she tries to hide
From the horrid stares as she walks by
Traumatized eyes glare as she wishes the day would end
For she’s too humiliated to face those she called “friends”
You promised we would be together forever
I guess forever isn't such a long time
White lies and night cries
You take but never give
I give but never live
You say you love me
But you left me.....
In that moment I lost it allI lost all hope, all beauty to the eyeI even lost curiosity on the last personthat stretched my mindEverything began to resemble a rockworthless, pointless, just taking up space
I roam from here to thereremaining discontent.My heart won't call this place a home,It must stay unattached.Everything is so unreal,I know it won't be long.Slowly I will drift away,
I'm lost,
Lost in a realm where though time is a deciding factor
It remains unrecognized for the world know.
Is one unshown in its happily ever
As the pedals fall from its own start
You start out thinking this year will be the one,
I will actually make an effort, not leave and be done.
Two weeks in and your thoughts have changed,
But when you felt ready to shake apart,
when the cold hands of fear gripped your heart.
Did you not then beg for aid?
Because you could never walk the path already laid.
And grass cut your voice thin,
As I walk into school,
I feel everyone’s eyes on me
They burn holes through my skin,
And their glances pierce my stomach
Darkness lies inside my mindCoiling around my soulScarce are those who are kindCausing me to not find my roll
It was September of '08 when I went into depressionNo other emotions other than sadness and agressionI lost two people in my lives that monthMy nana from cancerAnd my step-father who was cheating on my mom for months
Can’t stand this feeling anymore
So much built up inside just eating away
Burning all the way to the core
Feel like my whole life is starting to fade
You ask why, but I cant give the real answer
The story cant be heard
No its not correct to say the things that happened
Get personal,
NEVER! Its inappropriate..
But what if my story defines me
Life can flow,
Life can stop,
But don't you dare waste one drop,
For Life is Precious,
And Life is Blessed,
If you just end it you're guaranteed to be missed,
Life is like water,
The tears creep down my faceAs I watch him saunter awayAt an unsteady pace.I never wanted it to be this way. I look at my phone,Look at his ring.The tender loving boy I had known The song we once sang, he ceased to sing. The heart throbbing words
It's 3 in the morning
My parents are sleeping
My sister is dreaming
The dogs are howling
It's 3 in the morning
And the wind keeps blowing
The earth keeps spinning
The people are living
When cold, they slowly spread
Icy, sleepy, dead.
When hot, it all moves so quick
Bright, fiery, slick
They say particles move by heat
Is that not deep?
Do I move because I am deep?
I place the weight of my body onto a jagged rock on top of a mountain.
With my head turned to the left, the breeze brushes my cheeks.
Faces passing by
bland grey in the corner of my eye
To think I see them every day
again and again along my way
they don't know my name I don't know theirs
if one goes missing no one cares
Just one step and…gone
Maybe in an instant
Maybe after a few minutes
Gone
Maybe it will be like the movies
She
Looks for
Hope when she
Is in pain. But hope
Seems to run away because
You can't find something if you
Don't believe in it. She starts to lose
Her battle against her misery. The voices
She cries and breathes heavilyNo one understands her.She has tried over and over againTo fit in.
And yet when she walks down the hallwaysShe holds her books closerAs her so called peers look down on her.
Feeling great
I just got back from a date
But have not always been this way
Sure now I am ok
But there was a lot to mend
There was a point in my life I wanted it all to end.
Miss Shadows portrail
is what I consider betrail
because she looks nothing like me.
Miss Shadow sits
as my mind throws fits
so calm,
I can't imagine why.
They say time heals all wounds
But what if that isn’t true
Wounds eventually turn into scars
And time can’t heal a mark that lasts forever
Because whenever you look down, there it is
Someone is yelling in my dreams as I rest.Someone I don't like: with feelings I've surpressed.They tell my I'm strong on the surface,But as for my soul, It has no purpose.Someone who gets me in trouble,
Her eyes were blue
like the ocean.
The salty waves form
and roll on shore,
her cheek.
The continue to flow
until they drown her.
Her eyes,
the sea,
a door.
A girl stands directly in front of me.
Her eyes follow mine as she begins to smile.
I desire to know more.
I look closer and see the pain that she keeps hidden.
Her soul consists of emptiness.
Broken girl, going around with that fake little smile as she says "im good." It's a lie, she goes home just to cry. She runs miles a day in the rain, in a sweater. Just to lose the pounds shes gained.
We are both earthquakes
because we are scared
and I don’t think I can kiss the moon beams
anymore.
My lips
have become raw
and bruised
and scabbed
from whispering your name.
Can I be understood I wonder
I am so awfully unique
The good and bad of it is so plain
My voice makes no thunder
My view is too terribly bleak
My reality too much to blame
On something so horribly cheap
I wish I could tell you then, how much I really love you.
You became less important, as my love for others grew.
You are a true gift, a blessing indeed; I wish I knew that then
Sadness is some thing that often over takes my soul.
I feel a empty ness inside myself and can't break it,
I cry as the sadness pounds on me from all around, and can't seem to shake it.
A girl wanting more,
Struggled with self confidence,
Bound to her own thoughts.
Thoughts that destroyed her.
Shouting that there is no hope,
Refusing to stop.
Yet something remained,
How will I die?
Will I die by fire?
Will it be the tumbling of an empire?
Maybe I will drown.
Or get shot up in town.
These are all possibilities.
But I know which will happen.
How could it eat you alive,
look through your eyes
and control your every move.
Your poor soul was taken with the
She walks alone,
She eats alone ,
She doesnt talk much,
might just say a simple hello,
occationally She smiles,
but She smilles at The Tree,
for She can talk to it,
and it can talk to she,
I'd take It all.
Every one that you have ever had.
You'd never experiene It;
Think of what life would be like!
All of It.
Gone.
It wouldn't happen with a snap of a finger.
Shadows are dark
So it's easy to hide
Because it is so afraid
Of showing itself on the outside
Shadows could be around people
Shadows could be found behind anything
Found behind boxes
O solar flares. Take me away from this terrible place where loved ones turn on you. Solar flare, why don't u come a little closer. Don't be afraid. Take all my troubles away.
Alone lost in the abyss
Towering figures lack of grace
Brute actions hidden in a subtle pace
Movements that burn away
The euphoria of nostalgia
Time is but a fatal tease
Oh please oh please cease
Tearstained face from all the stress,
Tired of being caught up in this mess.
Faded scars on my skin,
Memories appearing again and again.
My Love he makes me the happiest, but he also causes me so much pain
I wish I never met him, but I also want to be held in his strong arms
My Love he is full of rage, but he is also so senistive
She held him tightly as she bled
A gushing pool of crimson red.
He cried out, “How can this be?
“Why must she be down, and why not me?”
Her wedding dress was now drenched,
There's a point in time when sadness becomes unshakeable.
and becomes a being whos thirst for bearing pain is insatiable.
When you allow it to, sadness will find a voice of it's own and start speaking
The darkness
it swells up like a wave
getting taller every second
it looms ominously over my head
and then
suddenly
it crashes down and engulfs me
making everything
dark
I noted today that hope oft dissipates to the cloudsIs that because it's where dreams are found?A forlon sigh that travels the windWill surely find freedom come world's end
All I see in this world,
is blue
having no one to confide in you
you find yourself inapt to do
the things you wish to find and sew.
Pieces left to rot and dew
the minds who have not a clue
Show me how you bleed,
I will bleed out in your place and kiss your aching heart.
Teach me how you sin,
I will sin twice as much and embrace your broken soul.
This disease is stealing you away from everybody you care about
inability to disclose
you need help but you can't accept it
too proud to take anybody's hand
or to admit defeat
and then with poetic justice
BEING ALONE IS different THAN BEING LONELY
BEING ALONE IS SOMETHING YOU choose
BEING LONELY IS not
Perhaps I will purchase new glassesAnd frame my darkened lamps anewAnd auspiciously. Here I might beseech,Behold, and betoken another looking-glass self;Here enkindle and focus new knowledge
I don’t know what got me here… I don’t know why I’m here, I don’t know who brought me… the last thing I remember is saying goodbye world.
"Just come to me my dear, and you will have no fear."
She walks alone through school; no one seems to think she's cool.
There's something about her that makes my dead heart stir.
"I'm so lonely. I'm Mr. Lonely.
I have nobody..."
these words ring true in my ears
from that shitty song so popular a lifetime ago.
But back then I didn't listen
and couldn't empathize.
I had a friend and
You really think it’s hard to live in blue?
I wish you the best in finding yellow.
You should shoot for pink in its harshest hue,
or mint green, I heard it keeps you mellow.
You’re much too old for orange’s energy,
Mirror, o' mirror
Clung upon my wall.
Reveal unto me Life
Or, blessed Death shall befall!
A Frankenstein of thought
Molded by the Divine.
A Mad hatters’ noxious creation,
Through and through the lines were blue
The paper, white; the pencil, new
Each stroke the artist made gave way
To new creations everyday
All her life, she drew and drew
Pain, Torment, Hurt, Sorrow, Emptiness
Feelings I experience everyday
There is no way to describe
Let them wash away and happiness stay
You're tired.
Each day weighs heavily on your tongue.
Where do you go? What do you do? Who do you become?
You stumble into a yellowing kitchen.
Cupboard doors hang onto their hinges with tremulous grips.
Love doesn't come with directions,
it's never quite the same
Sometimes it leaves you broken up,
or changes your last name
One look,
one touch,
one smile could really change it all
and you lie awake at night listening to the sweet stars whispering sweet lies.the bright Darkness of the nightsky glaring down at you.
What eats me up inside, is what is keeping me sane.
What eats me up inside, is what is keeping me insane.
Living with such conditions is not a choice, but a blessing.
Why do I write?Because it is the thing that lets me be creativeWhy does anyone write poetry?It's a song one can sing without knowing the correct notes
My father is an alcoholic.
My mother's love is harsh.
When I talk, nothing I say is heard
The only thing keeping me sane is my writing.
It's my outlet when everything is going downhill.
I sit with a post it,
Willing the words from my sophomoric mind,
And they do not come,
For I have nothing to say.
She walked and walked, appearing to enjoy life,
But no one noticed her cuts and her strife.
She stayed up one night thinking about an unreachable bliss,
And she cried as she watched the blood drip from her wrist.
I miss the stones
That used to tap on my window
To wake me up
And sneak out with my people
I would softly laugh
As I climbed down the wall
To greet you with open arms
But now you are gone
You never took the time to see how i felt,
You simply did instead of do.
I was hurt , Heartbroken and unheard
and now im all alone.
Helpless, Defenseless and Aching .
Visitation Day
A long hall with locked doors on either end
Some unfamiliar face through a window has to buzz you in
Why I Write?
What kind of question is that?
Why do you breathe?
Why do you speak?
Why do you sit there and think?
Some Dance and sing
Some Do math and physics
Like the sound of silence calling,
I hear your voice aloud and suddenly,
I feel I'm falling, lost in a dream.
You were everything to me,
The air that I breathe,
Wandering Words
A violin has potential to awaken a heart with her lovely tune
Just as words have the potential
To free someone
The loneliness consumes me
like a disease marked black with the stench of death.
A feeling of isolation comes and goes,
as sometimes I like it,
and sometimes I don't.
The weathered floor of my mediocre bedroom
Speak out!
The voice of mutes made by cries that fall on deaf ears.
The sounds of silence ringing on telephones of imagination and hopeful expectation.
Filled with dignity,
Clothed in shame.
The pain that I felt over the years
The kind that brought those silent tears
The more I saw my heart break
The less of a women in myself I thought I could make
Many times I thought I fought my love
As I am
Not like many others who do not stray
I am but one of whom you can't clone
Whose emotional tune does not play
Triggering the thought of loneliness at will
Sacrificing myself at every turn
There once was a girl
With long brown hair
With bright blue eyes
And skin so fair
There once was a girl
With tears in her eyes
With a blade in her hand
And shaken with cries
Broken streets mind is forced to travel,
Empty soul enforced to search.
Trembling hands hunt for redemption,
Merely paper they unearth.
Lips begin to quiver
As crystal escapes at last,
Sitting in an empty room with nothing but me
Enclosed by four walls that stare at me
With no mercy or sympathy they stare
With menacing eyes they stare
I've never been the girl who was alone.
I always had a friend by my side,
walking down the halls in school,
over summer break in the park,
there was always someone who asked me to come.
Carlyn Frye
Why I Write Scholarship
08/10/2013
Troubling Inspiration
Married, four kids, a big household
Working for a company with a huge work load
He writes poetry,
He writes art.
Poetry brings out the loud voice within him,
Poetry was the elation he needed during those dark moments in high school.
Yes, poetry was his anti-depressant. His drug.
The 5 senses I was blessed with became my curse
I saw, I felt, I smelled, I heard, i tasted what my life offered me
My hopes, thoughts, and dreams became deflected
A star-studded calendar and meeting the sun every day at seven cannot curve the blowOf the fact that we are learning the unspoken of moving apart.I miss you.
Black.
I turn to the square.
It’s light immense, mesmerizing, captivating.
And there’s color.
So much color. I can’t stop myself from looking.
For so long i struggled with unhappiness.
Looking into the mirror, wishing the pigment of my skin was just a tad bit fairer
That if so life would be a lot easier.
For me, just living wasn't even worth it
I am from a big city to a small town.
I am from the green eyes of my broken hearted mother.
I am from the epileptic father,
taken hours after my birth.
I am from the drunken, broken promises of my step father.
When so many things
are going through my head
I use Poetry to get them out
or it'll come out in the wrong way
The only acting I'm good at
is when I write
I can play a killer, an outcast,
As I sit in my room I ponder the many reasons why I write.
A ponder and wonder and think for a moment.
I have many reasons, and I shall try to be contrite....
I write to escape.
Poetry
What it meant to me before
Just words written in a stanza
With rhymes and patterns
I knew that they’re art expressed in words
Momma, don't you feel the water?
The water that drips all day?
Momma, it pours harder,
It will not go away,
I haven't read the Bible,
Don't recall the date,
But it's when I was stronger,
My struggles are hard to muster
I feel like nobody understands me
My struggles dull my luster
like rust to something shiny
I though I was a normal kid
living the suburban life
Now I'm black man
Disappointment ‘round every corner
Burnt bridges unsafe to venture
No top hats like the frog of Warner
Just utter sadness, until the need for dentures
Pitiful attempts to leave the nest
I write to bleed emotion on this blank piece of tree,to connect to the depths in my mind understnading why.
She tried to console me but her arms felt like chains, they were cold and skinny and mean like chains.
I told her she didn't care and I meant it, I felt that she was never there and I believed it.
I am the heart of my house now, i've become the very soul of this dark place.
The water of the dripping faucet is my tears and the lifeless broken mirror is my face.
I am the walls, plain, worn, and bare.
OH, EXCUSE ME
Let me dig myself a hole,
lace it with insincerity and senioritis
and fill it to the brim with misery
Allow me to proceed
to throw myself in this vacancy in the ground
Do you know what it's like
To be in this world alone?
To be so different
That no one understands?
As I wish upon the stars
For the very first time
I stand there
Like time is mine
The night flies past meMocking my sanityI scream silentlyPleading to the moon
My cries fall upon deaf earsI am again left to my selfWho is this with meA person I do not know
I write not because it makes me feel special,
Not because it makes me feel scholarly,
But because it’s my one bit of air that I gasp in
Before the tidal wave comes crashing down over my head,
Drowning
Depression hurts It is not the latest trend to be snapped up by the eager massesIt is a false faced monster that swallows up its prey without mercyIt is not a pretty jewel to add to a crowned head
Fight through the pain now
Don't give in to the night.
Take your last breath while standing
Let strength be your fight.
(chorus)
Lock-down 'cuz we're loesing ground
I can not die.I can not live.I can not lie.I can not give
My world falls, down a spiral I can not see.
Who's that guy?
Me, I..
Where do I fit?
Standing among the crowds,
Watching them all pass by,
They all have an identity.
Where do I fit?
I break their molds,
I am too good to be bad,
And too bad to be good.
I like the intricacies of verse,
multiple syllables strewn together in a formal
translation, a bump and struggle
for quick
comprehension before the next lines are said.
I’m not interested in vague references
It’s just an empty room,
crowded,
with people.
Their mouths move,
but nothing comes out.
A finger points furiously there.
A hand waves even further away.
A foot stomps vigorously somewhere.
I failed.There's no time left for this world.
It's just me in my lab sitting on this linoleum floor.
The lab once hailed for its cure
Has now left corpses piled at my door.
Isolation
Desperation
Perspiration
Desolation
Devastation
Condensation
Precipitation
Damnation
Our nation
Lost patience.
Determination.
Space can be compared to anything you might,
From a mystical journey to even a sweet delight
No one can know
Space: friend or foe
But even still we try with all our might.
The stars are specks of light,
A broken string of scattered pearls,
Dandruff, Dust on black velvet,
Rice thrown on a wedding day,
Snowflakes, White ashes on coal,
Pebbles in a riverbed,
Why did I feel that my presence was an abomination
and that a cut on my wrist should be my only physical sensation?
That at the drop of blood all my anguish would disappear,
The stars they shine, like diamonds in velvet.
So grand and so bright way up in the sky.
A breeze blew by but I barely felt it.
My mind mesmerized by those stars, but why?
Then clouds rolled in and I let out a sigh.
Solitary confinement is considered the worst type of punishment and cruelty any human can endure, and yet I punish myself. Isolating myself from the outside word, embracing total solitude.
Causing me to live in my own mind.
