School and Social Anxiety
Location
As I walk into school,
I feel everyone’s eyes on me
They burn holes through my skin,
And their glances pierce my stomach
I feel the nausea set in
It will last all day
I hear laughter behind me
Oh god, is there something on my pants?
Do they think my outfit is stupid?
Or am I just too fat?
In English class we take turns reading
The teacher calls on me
But my hands are sweating
And my body is shaking
And I can barely breathe
The words on the page start to blur and jumble
I sit there until she calls on someone else
Some other people snicker
Lunch times comes around, but I don’t eat
There’s no way I can keep an appetite in such a crowded noisy place
The smell of the food makes me want to throw up;
So I slip off to the library,
And I curl up in a corner chair until it’s over
We’re supposed to give a speech in History today
I just skip the class all together
I can’t go through with it
30 students all staring at me
Watching as I start to shake and cry
So I walk on home
Where I run to my room,
And curl up in my bed
I pull the blankets all around me
I cry, and I cry, and I cry
And I wish, and I wish, and I wish
That I will never have to go back to school again