behindthecurtainslam
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Though I study hard and long
People have questioned me all along
Adminstration always asking
And Parents always nagging
Let me choose the path I want
Let me choose the path I want
I live in a world full of black and white imagesOf bombings a violence acts so primitiveShades of gray mask my decisionsBecause a world without color makes you blind to it's messages
i've been staring at
a cold screen, a blank
sheet, an empty bed,
and a split mind.
torn down the middle--
i've been . . .
ripped--through--my center
I hurt him.
My first love.
I fell hard.
I forgot.
I erased.
I escaped.
I yearned.
I fought.
I resisted.
I regret.
I got hurt.
I hurt him.
Let me start off by saying I was a victim,
I was beat down and taken advantage of,
Three girls, those were my bullies
Physically, emotionally abusive.
I was told that I'm black and ugly,
My mother named me Dorothy
Not after a girl in blue gingham
Not after Jerry Maguire’s crush
I was named after her Grandmother
The Strongest woman she ever knew
A woman with a pilot’s license
They always say love yourself first,
other wise, you'll end up hurt.
But I'm tellin' you I loved me before.
It some how got out of hand and I started loving you more...
than myself.
I step onto the stage
ready to entertain,
but people do not know
Behind the curtain
I left my shame.
Fantasies are what they are seeing.
What draws you into hell?
Why do they bother hearing
A mask, a guise
A role to play
Beneath them all
A vast array
Of people, thoughts,
Of all clichés
Calm, chill, charming,
That is what people see.
I present a facade of confidence.
Little do they know,
My insides are burning.
Most do not know of the fear,
The fear of the future.
The internal Adriece is somebody who is loving, caring, respectful and sensitive
I tend to stay to myself most often. Although I'm very helpful and fun to talk to
So people enjoy being around me, because I'm not at all cocky
The numbness is pervasive like smoke. It is fast moving silk. Sensual. Smooth.
And I chase memories. Ones I'm not sure I'd like to catch.
What is light enough to be considered white?
Born with a combination of ethnic group and its a constant fight.
What is dark enough to be considered black?
Figuring out what you need with what you lack.
Behind what you see, there is a past.
Surprising to believe that this long it would last.
I may be smiling and happy if I try,
I smile when I think of my parents laughing,not understanding what they say, not a single thing.I smile when I capture a beautiful scene,loving the chemistry that lies in between.
I often hide
behind a false identity.
They think I'm boring,
because they don't know anything.
If they could only see me
for who I truly am.
But I won't allow it,
because sadly, I'm too fat.
Yes I do hide behind a mask of some sort
Due to the fact I am embarrsed to be myself
You grow up learning to love yourself
But as I grew up, I started to hate myself more and more
It's so much easier to hide rather than show your inner and true side
Never to let anyone see your masked identity
mask man
A mask man walking through life.
he smirks at all of its strife.
And some may ask why he smiles at lies.
Behind the curtains i see its only me
But when i open up i normally don't shut
Trusting that one person to be your curtain
There are many rips and tears in my curtins
From the many years of children pulling on them
Depressed,tired of being called out,wanting to quit
Try balancing a 3.5 GPS while you play sports and trying to "fit in"
Sometimes I want to give up. But my parents taught me better.
I smile when I want to cry
I laugh when I wanna scream
You wanna know why
Because when I cry or when I scream
It's pushed aside like a child's plea
Who am I today
Who was I yesterday
Hidden behind a smile
I haven't known for a while
I'v learned how to hide
The pain I hold inside
The broken parts of me
You will never see
Who am I
Behind the mask,
Just get to know me,
And you won't have to ask.
I'm like nobody else,
A snowflake of creation
An individual person
A source of inspiration.
Ah, the true me...
It might scare most to see
Who I am inside, truly
But, because you ask
I’ll take off my mask
And show you the true me.
Yes, slowly now I shall remove
all i can hear is the ticking of the clock,
though i'm halfway certain there is nothing but silence.
i would much rather be in a trance than here with such a horrid creature.
you ignite my every being only to
My shyness stays behind this curtain in the shade of purple. I pull back the curtains to see the crowd but my hands put them back. I'm afraid to show my real self. I want to show the real me, but half my mind won't allow it.
Beyond the face there is a brain.
It may not always be right,
It may not always be sane.
Beyond the eyes there is a vision.
What I wish I could see,
All the things that are missing.
He's blinding almost,
he's screaming out,
"Let me go!"
"Take me back!"
"Let me go!"
and..."Take me back." again
Blue is where she found misfortune.
She's tempted,
The curtain seems nice and beautiful
Filled with graceful colors
But there are a few things that seem unusual
Like a biscuit without butter
People come to ask her questions
And ask for some advice
its in my lonely
that I realize how I am frail and boney
how harsh I am to me,how my heart is stony
it is in my lonely
that I confront my phony
masks get dropped and the acting gets chopped
Carefully veiled behind my calm composure was a life I thought I deserved.
Misery, self-destruction and darkness.
I was in pain and somehow felt nothing at all.
Numbness, helplessness and silence.
What am I but a grain of sand in the ocean,
going through life's daily motion?
What am I but a single star,
shining but in space too far?
What am i but a snowflake,
melting with the rest in life's lake.
For years like many others I have participated in the world’s largest masquerade and come in full costume every time
I tie the cape around my neck, and snap on my gloves like a surgeon,
I am no doctor, but a physician of mirrors.
“Climb into the box and hand me the saw”
You think you know what I'm all about,
you see me walk, you see me talk.
You see the way I care for others,
My whole life I knew what wanted.
I was given every opportunity I could ever ask for.
I screwed up every opportunity that was ever given to me.
I thought I knew exactly what I wanted. Can I start over?
There used to be many curtains shielding me from
what I thougt I wanted to be
it too me a while to realize that lies would not make me who other people wanted to see
I have been made free.Free from all of the things that once binded me.
It is the beautiful saving work of Jesus.The grace that He poured out when he hung on a tree and died for us.
No longer a slave to the old.
You were never the one who got tests
hung up on the fridge
and you never handled a ball well enough
to earn a trophy
or attention.
You were never your sister, who had
