2015 Slam for Suicide Awareness and Prevention

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You spit out a dry laugh to try to hide the death in your eyes.
No one knew how close you were to the edge, you'd  turn to a bottle before you turn to a friend. You could've said something , you should've still been here.
Being different is rare Even if you're judged, be yourself You build your own life
With the break of day approaching.. a young boy strugles in his deep sleep... tormented by his folks past misfortunes...the demons they thought they had gotten rid of..
1 2 3 4 5 6 at 6 I learned that marriage can't end well and that families can't be happy 7 at 7 I knew things that I shouldn't  have. 7 I wrote stories about death and sex and murder. 
The Church bells are tolling and crying A women dead before her years remembered only by empty tears and the cries of "Oh the humanity!" But those Humans took away her abillity
      The air is hard to breathe. Nights are too long and the days are too bright. It is hard to see the world as others
I laugh. I smile. I tell jokes. I'm okay, is what I say.   (I cry   I weep   I'm falling,   spiraling     Help)  
The Bicentennial man for 200 years seeking to a real human be Santa Claus by accident but the best Santa and no question indeed With a smile as bright as diamonds With a mind as bright as the sun
I am not a statisitc. It is shown that there is 1 death every 13 minutes by suicide; Suicide takes the lives of over 38,000 people per year; Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in all ages
Watching you struggle hurts.
Am I alone? I was looking for someone In a thick mist, but I couldn't see anyone. I could see clearly but my mind was clouded with fog so dense that I felt like I was being suffocated.
  Every tear that siliently falls from underneath your eyes Is just a piece of the pain you feel inside. The pain is so overwhelming that you need to find a solution, But instead you find the temporary conclusion
who cares?
She had a mouth full of metal Spent her nights running from horses and riding her days after dreams
Bulletproof is what i want to be when it comes to the t
My skin is paper Thin and weak I look for shields Over the weeks. My skin is a canvas Nice and strong Ready for painting All night long. But my time is nearing
Courage is one thing that no one can ever take away from you. 
I should have known him better Because he was my friend for a year Our interests differed and we never saw each other in class But I promise I knew him Once   They said he became a pot head
A ghost of a girl still remains, in a family photo with a broken frame. Tattered skin, fake smiles, a bleeding soul that could run for miles. Long sleeves, baggy clothes,
Her last words before she left Not Amazing Not Great But Fine  Words that fell from lying lips Slid through clenched teeth to give us the relief and calm we needed Appease our minds
Someone switched my lenses, someone turned my world to gray. Someone has me dodging fences life keeps putting in my way. Someone took my purpose, someone drowned all my hope.
    Might it be better to be alone forever?
I know you think this can'
There is a word An emotion The anti-me: Happy  
The tears fall down my cheeks, The wounds will never heal. It burns, stings, tugs, The pain is so surreal.  
I remember—
 February 9th 2014. Started off as any other day, awaiting the month of May
Stop. Release your tension, grip at your thoughts of hatred, yell ‘stop!’ Breathe.
One step forward and its the end of the line
Her life was an abyss of cold memories  And empty promises,
In so little
Life is much like a movie From horror all the way to comedy Scream, laugh, and cry Nothing is easy for you and I The light seems to fade But someone will remove the shade
Stop and think about what you are doing, This time you feel like it's the end of the line. Please don't do it please, You may not see your purpose now; There is a reason why you are here.
I battle everyday with myself, family and friends. It hurts so much to admit something is wrong. It's hard to ask for help when I don't want anyone to know everything I've been going through.
I've been there, And I think you, too,  know where.The state of uselessness; the curisoity as to if anyone cares.  To this feeling of desolation nothing else compares.  
A poem inspired by the 2014 suicide of a high school senior from my alma mater.   Another empty chair Another soulless stare From the eyes bulging out No one could ever care
I want to stop trying,
Am I desperate or just insane? Because in this moment all I see is the pain in my face as well as yours, You won't let me apologize for this because you say it's not my fault, But you tell me it is my fault,
Imagine... You're just a normal person You live like everyone else Happy, smiling, the most loved person in your circle of friends Great grades, fantastic job, nothing could possibly be wrong
I'm just an average dude in some average shoes, and I'm writing this letter addressed strictly to you so I really hope you're listening, paying some attention Because there's quite a few messages that I fit in here
Sit Sigh Wait. Nothing Seems To Come And Again You’re Alone. They’ll Leave You Alone At Last. Yes. | Time Slows And Lets You Think
You may think that no one understands how you feel, but we do. We all have depression or anxiety and those thoughts that will take over your life, But we do understand. We just have the feelings at different times.
I cry every night. You think I'm fine because I cover up with a fake smile. Later, I cry infront of you. I couldn't hold it in. You asked why. I told you. I'm suicidal And I want to die. I don't want to live anymore.
Pain fills her body One final tear falls Blades across her skin Pills in her hand; down her thorat Her body falls to the ground Her body hits the floor so hard Her mom runs uptairs
This boy is seen as happy He does not seem concerned How he presents himself His feelings are not discerned. He is angry at the world, He is angry at his best friend, He is angry at his family,
You never answered any of my questions, left me cast down and astray.
Whose to say goodbye? Dare and do not try Any longer to live in sorrow Lights cut to black, no tomorrow Fade far into the other side When targeted and victimized Paralyzed by words made in disdain
Can you come over? It's a matter of life and death Can we talk? It's a matter of life and death Answer your phone I don't know what to do I was hoping I could talk to you
I know that you won’t understand. I don’t think anyone will and that’s okay. I just have to release these thoughts from my mind. I am pretty. That’s what I should believe, right? Well, I don’t. People tell me that I’m not hefty, I’m not big.
Maybe he didn't see the wall.Maybe the darkness forbid sight.Maybe the fog of Depressionsettled over his eyes, blinding,obstructing his perspective.  
Every night I hear it call to mefrom across the room,the tintinnabulation of its twin tines enticing me to indulge; threatening, promising to keep its hold on me forever.    
you are not alone I promise one day you will smile and your eyes will light up and you will mean it and I will hold your hand and I will mean it you are here you are okay
Not mad, sad nor happy Just tried and sleepless. Laying in bed, Just thinking and thinking. My dreams are blurring,
Tell me daughter do you feel the loneliness you
In the past year  I've taken too many tylenol 
It's all fun and games to us, Sticks and stones can't hurt them. Words are harmless I'm sure. But sharpened knives and loaded guns Can end their lives in a flash.
They know me as your smile I’m bright, I'm cheery To me, every day is worthwhile But you know me as dreary  
I know it might seem like the world is crashing down Trust me I know what it's to feel like that It feels like you're standing in the rain without an umbrella Stuck in an eternal darkness
Do you remember When you were a young, innocent caterpillar,
I live for the little things   I’m not a thug or a gangsta But I live to hear Tupac spit his illest lyrics I’m not a mighty chocolate colored goddess But I live to read the inspiration of Maya Angelou
Give me the strength I need To love me Give me the strength I need To keep breathing Please give me strength I need Because I don’t have any left   I thought it was over
I want to kill myself when there’s no hope that things will change. Nobody will let me forget how I look. I don’t care how I look, so why the hell should everybody else?
Don’t you see me crying? Deep inside I'm dying. You ask me if I'm fine. Why can't you tell I'm lying?   The tears are building up. They're tumbling down inside me.
In the wonderland of life There should only be one use for a knife For it would be a choice you cannot undo Your life won’t be brand new
Hush little baby Don’t you cry Sissy’s gonna sing you a lullaby Don’t grab that bottle Don’t say goodbye
The darkness swallows him The light in his head is too dim Not much happiness to be found He screams but you hear no sound He’s fading faster fast If only friendships would last
  Just beouse you don't feel it           don't assume your not loved Just becouse you feel ignored
In front of the mirror she stands,The shaking is eminent upon her hands,
We never knew it, never saw the signs, never saw the tears behind the dry eyes. All the covered brusies,
He conveys a word with weary eyes, Expressing emotions so profoundly wounded. Suicide. But a sweet smile is too believable, With the sun naked from waning clouds, Waning until there is no more,
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