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Most Days by: RalB  most days i felt worthlessi felt irreplaceablelost in what was & what could’ve trying not to be numbbut being is so superbunsure & uncertain most days i felt broken i felt helpless calling out into the darkness silent p
Your saliva, it resonates on my lips. It's cold, it's wet, it reeks with the scent of your breath - it seeps into the cracks of your skin, into mine.  I sit stiff yet you kiss and kiss.   I don't want this. 
Dear Ex-Girlfriend, I would have put your name But that seemed too real for me. What would be such a relief to me is if this were just a sappy break up letter, but. It’s not.
I hear myself say it too often. I probably just fucked up again. Maybe you broke me, again.   Perhaps it's my astonishment, quite possible since I'm great. Until you tell me I'm not.  
As red falls, I can’t help but cry for days. The five stages, a sign of hope, seems fake.How can you be happy when all decays?
Cut me open like you do those scars on your wrists. You use to hate the sight of blood, But now the sting and crimson oozing from your wrist has become your favorite addiction.
I’ve never had stitches.Though my efforts to scratch my itching bones
I cry silently,  Two liquids pool on the floor. I never want to wake up, I  Never want to implore The sadness of my  Being. The emptiness I am Feeling. "Help!" I cry inaudibly
The act of ignoring someone is: refusing to take notice of or acknowledge them   When you're ignored, you learn to live in a world of silence.
What is a poet? Me, you, the world. What’s it to me? I tell a tale With words and thoughts Muddled together as a I talk and sing. Trying to get people to understand The world within me.
I let my breath goPlease don’t let me be a statisticI cry into my mothers arms, the first time I told her of my abuse.I refuse.I will not let someone else feel what I have felt.
I have no grip to the ground on this earth The rubber on the soles of my shoes is worn down Nothing ties me down to the trees To the dying flowers To the muddy grass And gravity is nothing more than a nuisance
Alone upon the wreckage, Broken hearts on either side, The dark distorted crater, Where my last hope came and died.   The darkness all around me, Not cut through by the light, My solo isolation,
Mistrust and suspicion rule in my brain They run  cross country inside my heart. Loud thumping, mind racing, loosing the control Your breaths quicken and your sight blurs.
One The first is always the hardest. You have to push yourself into it. Cutting into innocence, cutting into your soul. At first it stings but soon it subsides and you crave the lingering feeling of control.  
“Faggot.” “Lesbo.” I am scared of these hallways. These white walls haunt me and I dread entering them. Let me loose. Gay rights? They don’t exist here. “Welcome to Hell” the sign should say.
My heart is a dull thud in my chest. Drained from all life, it struggles to beat once, twice,
Sometimes, things hit a little too close to home too close for comfort other times, things hit home with a resounding boom, you'll hear everything come crashing around you
Slit my wrists and hope to die Not for one more second do I want to have open eyes Leave this world eternally Sleep forever, oh so blissfully No more worries to keep me up No reason to give a fuck
The first time he looks through the barrel
Is it too much to ask To ask for a space Where a girl feels like saying ‘No’ Wouldn’t be out of place? To see a court case
Everyday I come home crying. Everyday I hate myself a little more. Everyday I hope to die. Everyday my limits are pushed. Everyday I am laughed at, taunted, and abused. Everyday I hope I don't wake up.
Drowning in the confusion that is my soul. Begging for mercy, from this unknown path that I'm taking. Reflecting numbness, but I'm only searching for it, always calling out in the night.
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