' 'Abuse' 'toxic relationships’; depression ; sadness ; loneliness

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It's not me but the idea of having someone It's hard to understand for you reader but she broke my heart
Alone is an understatement when explaining there's a deeper feeling in my chest that's just raging emptiness and sadness all throughout my body feeling like noone can understand me doesn't anyone see?
Started out so innocently, Wanting peace, Quiet,  Stability.   Grew up around chaos, Home life see, Much stress and conufsion, Unpredictability.   No rules,
I came to the hospital  And i wanted help for me Do i need the help Or can they kill me please  
Stand up for those in need, for all those who are in pain, Stand up for all to see, it's time to make a change,   Stand up for those who are suffering, for those whose broken hearts grieve,
Blood: Pulsing. Stomach: Lurching. Eyes: Blurring.   Palpitations…   Palpitations…   I know you hate me.
Do not tell me That you still care. I can see your lies Like a bird flying through the air. I can tell the difference Between right and wrong. You say you can too. You think you're strong.
I woke today and started thinking about all the other girls you use to entertain you. And how you still talk to them because you "went through something together" immediately my heart starts pounding and I can't catch my breath.
alone    always alone people all around   but not around me im always alone    even with friends never in this world     neither in the next in and out     I fade slowly
A shell    I feel like  shell Empty      Forgotton unused    Unwanted By everyone    and everything The feeling of Emptiness     is so strong its all i feel    now
is it me, or just a comforting presenceone that wont look at you wrong, a fear of feeling i may never be more than you wanted me to bea wild feeling, one i cant escape are you a feeling, or true comfortsecurity, safety, and seamless satire who am
Probably that one day  I’ll go down there to see you  Then I was the one that you didn’t know  You wanna have a really nice night? I love you too baby 
Sorry baby  I’m gonna go out on the day  I was just asking what I was gonna do  I was like I gotta beat the time  I wanna see you baby  soon baby 
Well that’s good I guess you’re not fine I’m just trying  It is like that  You’re right  I was gonna wish you a happy birthday
I don’t know how to do it to you  Do you want me to stay home And then I’ll take you to my bed And then I’ll take you to my bed And then I’ll take you to my bed
A Question I reach out but no one hears     Within the silence are my worst fears Why do I look for reason in every day     I tell myself I no longer wish to stay
Memories are shadows I trace in silhouette.Face unwise, as my right eye glistens in the color of a purplette   I remember all of him, intoxicating as if the air was too thick to breathe in  
You treated me like shit You lied to me too many times  You made me feel so many things You hurt me in so many ways  You mentally abused me  You physical abused me  You emtional abused me
The words hurt the most. The physical abuse hurts too but you go through the healing process and it’s over.
  He was far more damaged than she could imagine. She was light and he was darkness. He hated his life and everything in it.
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