The Pills

I'm sitting here
On the bathroom floor
The water surrounds me in an ever changing pool of tears
I search the vastness of the floor
And find in my vision
The bottle of pills
Now empty but for a few
I close my eyes
My heart is racing
My hands are shaking
My palms are sweaty
I open my eyes and the world is spinning
I open my mouth to scream for help
But I do not utter a sound
I don't want this to end
I just wanted the thoughts to disappear
In a cloud of a haze
But they're still here
And my teeth are chattering
My fingernails rip open the tiles of the floor
I take a long, shaky breath
This is what I wanted, right?
Not anymore
But I can't breathe
The end is close
And I don't want it to come
I reach for the door
Just as it slams open
They're here
I'm still here, I whisper
A hug
I can breathe
This won't happen again.

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