My Opposite Blessing

Wed, 12/21/2016 - 16:25 -- CAVM

Icy like mint

My favorite scent
But your smell is warm like fire
And I learned to love it
And it felt like home
I see colors
I correlate scenarios with colors
Icy blue is my favorite
But your aura is a mixture of yellow, red, and orange

And it’s not the devilish type of thing
It’s the thing that warms a cold soul;

it’s the thing that brings brightness to people.

Why am I scared of getting too attached?
No actually being separated and getting left...
Being forgotten
Why do I try to please everyone?
Why do I keep sacrificing?
Why do I just want to cry myself to sleep?
Why am I trying to avoid you when you're the only one that makes my whole day?
Why do I think you're lying, but being honest at the same time?
Why do I feel like I deserve more?
Why do I get way too ahead of myself?
Why do I not know what to feel anymore?

It sucks so bad
I want to hit you up real bad
But I don't want to be a fool
I've been a fool for too long now
And it does me no good
I am away from you
Yet I am here stressing out real bad about you
You're all that I think about
And I never even probably crossed your mind

We have some growing up to do,
We need to mature,
Before we get attach but my feelings don’t work like that
U dont seem like someone who would do that

but what if I could change your mind
We have three years to do it,
To develop and grow,
Maybe together, maybe apart,
But that’s the part that terrifies me
Because what if while we’re trying to grow up
We grew apart.
And you find the happiness that you bring to me from someone else...
And that’s terrifying...

the thought of me being separated from someone who:

Made me so comfortable,
Made me feel at home,
Made me feel worthy of something,
Made life worth living, and made reality better than my dreams and fantasy
What if I just let that all slip away?
Something I’ll regret every day.

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