Burned Pages and Scattered Thoughts
I burn the pages
of my oldest notebooks,
erasing the ages
that have passed me by.
I remember the old days,
and cheerful jokes told
paired with a longing gaze,
and my calloused fingertips.
You caused this,
you caused it all to disappear
you brought all of this upon yourself,
all because you gave me reasons to have fear.
I want you gone
removed from my heart
this burning feeling
I don't know how to start
to rip you off my chest
and cut ties from my worries.
It hurts but I remember why
as my vision gets blurry.
I'm no longer scared
of the things that tore me away
from the ones that I loved
and the ones who swore they'd stay.
You caused all this havoc,
and as I look down,
I'm reminded why I need you
as the pool of red surrounds
my brand new shoes, they were white
I bought them yesterday.
They're a bit scuffed from my hike
and I want to go home.
You're not a part of me anymore
but you follow close behind,
following you is a trail of gore
the pieces useless to me.
I hope one day you'll be gone
and I'll be free from all of you,
but as for now I'll just run
and lace my fingers with another.
I love the people close to me,
they mean the world and more
It's almost as if I need
those parts I shed before.
I'll walk along these dirty paths
you'll creep along, following me.
And I remember those times I fell into a hole
caused by you, my anxiety.