Who Knew

they say we don't write letters

but I wrote 'em

just last year

christmas alone

the only thing I wanted was to speak

but he was 








half a nation 


away from me

i got random phone calls

but letters were the best way to talk


those months of misery are gone

yet they still touch me

I can flip through every one i recieved


DAMN his hand writting in this forced uppercase was horrible

but back then

it was like magic when i checked the mailbox hourly 

and there it was

I could breathe again


in my letters i used wacky fonts

slid in pictures to motivate


and gave him an alpaca sticker for his time



  time that was painful

    time that still feels so recent

      time that is still here


even when university tried to best me

its hard to be distracted

it weights heavily on the mind


the hardest time i cried

muffled in a bathtub beside his sleeping family


so by his side for just this once

and only for a short while

who knew

that long term long distance sucked

who knew

that being a military wife sucked even harder








but what i didn't recognize

is the amount i grew and matured in a year's time


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