I would like to be alone now

I don’t really want to though

Maybe I’m just going to be sad forever

Maybe all I understand right now is that you don’t hate me

I don’t like me very much

I guess I know you love me

Sometimes

My brain, no, my heart, knows, I’m not exactly sure

I just feel kind of alone

It’d probably be easier than having to feel (fear) all the time

Everyone writes about how time is their enemy

I think I read somewhere that time is neutral

It just exists. It’s what you do with it that matters.

Time has left me alone. I’m a second out of sync with reality; always behind and always alone.

Am I alone though? No but I feel it.

There is a difference between what is real and

what I feel but I don’t know how big the gap is

or how i can ever hope to meet in the middle. My heart (or is it my mind)

isn’t making sense. My emotions are incompatible. Are

thoughts and emotion different yes I suppose they are

Descartes showed that I can’t disprove my own existence

but maybe I am nothing more than a fragment of a

memory or thought in the great almost emptiness

of someone else’s mind

maybe we are all like atoms, important

but mostly empty, glued to one another

because we don’t have any other option

or maybe I just don’t know how science works

maybe I just don’t know anything at all