Image by Moses L. Garcia

 

Blackness, blackness

Swallow me whole

The tears have not come yet

But they will soon be here

 

The raw, the hurt

In this darkness

Dimly lit

What sweet nightlight

Jagged holes loom within

The world hurts too much

And the screams are silent

 

All through the day

The sun rose and it set

Though when is hazy

And there is this numb feeling

As I sit

Staring at the wall

And I expect you to

Walk through the door

“Surprise! Here I am”

I won’t be mad,

Maybe just a little

But there will be so much pain

So worth the pain

Of seeing you again

Please come home

My bones feel hollow

Did I eat today?

 

The second night

After the first day

Beyond day zero

But still so painful

The silent screams

They are still there

“Come home”

“I’ll be good”

“I’ll do anything”

The jagged holes are still there

But they are hidden behind

A curtain of white

 

Everyone knows now

Most everyone

Time has past

But I’m not sure how long

Two weeks, maybe three?

We are going to your funeral

Who drove us?

What am I wearing?

What a beautiful pin

Green ribbon close to my heart and

Oh.

 

Look up.

There are so many of them.

I think I asked them to come.

There’s a couch and we sit on it

They are my barrier against the cold winds

A circle of warmth

Surrounding these jagged holes of mine

What holes?

This thing on my face

That causes strange looks

I think it’s called

A smile