“We’re one hundred miles from home”
is what I heard my father say today
in the car leaving the college that
I’ll be going to in the fall.

Hundred miles from home
is where I’ll be for the next
four, five years
and that thought terrifies me
but I know that I have to leave
because if I don’t leave now,
then I probably never will

But the reality of my leaving
never seemed so blunt
until I heard those words
from my father’s mouth.

Hundred miles from home,
hundred miles from everything
I’ve ever known;
everyone I’ve ever loved
and I don’t know
how the fuck I’m going to
survive.

Hell, I can barely introduce
myself to someone without
shaking from the anxiety
that has taken control
of so many parts in my life,
but I have to try.

I don’t know how
I’m going to make it
or where this life is
going to take me,
but I know, oh I know
that I need to, have
to go
for me,
for me.