I wish to find myself among the angels,
I wish to die a martyr,
I wish for God to forgive my sins,
And for the soft mold of forgiveness to cool my scarred hands,
I wish that I could forgive myself,
I hope and dream that God won't hate me,
Trying not to conform to society,
I hope that I can forgive myself,
No matter how many times I feel the relief of praying,
I still commit sins again,
Even though he says it's impossible,
I wish to never sin,
Imagining the sadness in his features,
Hurting my heart, and mind,
I wish to never bring God this pain,
Of knowing I still sin,
Forever I will want forgiveness,
Forever God will give it kindly,
And like a child I take it in handfuls,
Without my manners having taught me,
I wish forever for forgiveness,
Though I always have it right behind me,
I cannot bring myself to forgive,
For every single sin that has blinded me