Surrounded by voices; I was a <murmur>. 

Fear had stolen my lips away,

Locked them in a vault under the sea-

 

Why?

 

My mind was confused.

Every sentence spoken to me was a bumbling river,

 

Beautiful.                                       But meaningless.

 

Trapped in my own conscience

I glanced around to see if others were struggling

But I saw no one.

 

 

It was so frustrating.

Language was my *love*, writing my *wings*.

Yet here I was at the bottom of the sea!

I wanted to SCREAM for help, but the waves covered me saying-

 

"No one will understand."

 

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

So I stayed quiet.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

 

I avoided leaving my hole

Afraid everyone around me was fishing,

And I was the prize  >fish).

 

The best way to avoid pain was to avoid life,

But I loved life. 

 

The waves beating against a b-r-o-k-e-n shore,

The sound of loud waterfalls filling the sky-

 

Before I made a mistake,

A mistake that could not be returned, 

I needed a reminder.

 

Luckily, my neighbor was a waterfall.

 

He cried out for someone to come to him,

***And how I wanted to.***

I put on my big girl panties

And ~~~~~swam~~~~~~ to the shore. 

I climbed up slippery slopes and dangerous       d

                                                                        r

                                                                        o

                                                                        p

                                                                        s

My feet faltered-

I could die up here,

                                  But that was okay.

 

I squeezed myself into a nitch on the top of the falls,

Forcing myself with a painful breathe to look down at the crowd-

A bunch of multi-colored dots who whooped and hollered below.

And suddenly, I understood.

 

 

 

 

 

 

No, you don't understand. /I UNDERSTOOD./

"You got this!" "Don't be scared!" "Jump!"

I didn't need their language! 

I hollered back.

 

The harsh water at my back urged me forward

So I obliged

I let        -                -                  -               go.

I let go of all the fear that had held me back,

All the BULLCRAP.

All the awkward misunderstandings, glances, and pain.

All the {unneccesary}

 

Water went up my nose as I rose,

I swept my glop of hair back,

Pulled my hands away from water's grasp

Pushed them to the sky

And felt alive for the first time in a long time.

*

  *

    *

      *

       *

         *

           *

              And after that?

 

              I smiled at the cashier at the grocery store  :)

 

              I waved at my neighbors  ~

 

              Laughed with the children on the beach  :D

              

              Why?

              Because the falls taught me that I didn't need language

                                                                                       To understand.