One too many times, I swallowed away the pain

While all the time, you were buying my love

and I am still overdosing, choking on you endlessly

While you stand in my door frame, wondering why I'm dying

 

You told me you love me, and pain will not win,

that even through the darkest times, you would save me from sin

and I trusted in you, to save me from myself, when all this time,

you were not trying to help

It hurts to know I popped pills for all that you do,

and it pains me to say that I still love you

 

One too many times, I chugged away my tears,

While all this time, you were breaking the bottles

and I am still hungover, drowning in you completely

It makes me wonder why I chose to grab you, why I chose to sink

and it kills me to know that I still love to bottle your drink

 

Problems they tell me, I have one too many

but as long as I am dying, I will never have plenty

You're the reason I picked the pill, to calm me of my sorrows

The reason I took that pack and drank until tomorrow,

my happy days, my sad days, my angry and in between

but no amount of drinking, no amount of pills, could bring you away from me

 

-Chloe Aldecoa