My abcs, my 123s,

My ins and outs,

My ups and downs,

Weren't as easy as they seem.

There was a battle-

A battle for my brain,

A battle for my consciousness,

A battle for my pain.

So my abcs, My 123s

My ins and outs

My ups and downs

Aren’t as easy as they seem.

There was a battle in my heart-

A battle tore my soul,

A battle broke my hope,

A battle took it’s toll.

So my abcs, My 123s

My ins and outs,

My ups and downs,

Can’t be as easy as they seem.

There was a war that no one saw.

A war within myself.

But wars do not exist to you-

Unless you’ve seen death itself.  

 

I may have had my struggles,

But I know my basic math.

I know which life needs subtraction-

To prove that casualties

Don’t have to equal one-

For there to be a war.

Because the answer is none.

For the wars are in many

And, compared, I am but none,

But too many wars have been lost-

And I may be a hopeful one.

I could show you the numbers-

I could show you the pain-

But you would not believe me,

Because the casualties

In your book

Still read none.

 

Your fear calls me a liar-

Calls me dangerous-

Calls me tired.

Tired yes,

Dangerous, like you,

Liar, sometimes,

But not about my war.

For those who know-

War is just too real.

No lie can I make

That equals this horror,

This war in me,

This war in others.

 

My relevance is your health care prices-

Your gun control issue.

You fight for what’s right,

But my war, their war,

is ignored,

You good samaritans,

Idolized Americans,

You see us lying on the road

Bleeding from our wounds,

So You call us liars-

You call us thieves-

You call us dangerous-

As we lie dying on your roads,

Victims of war.

Refugees in flight.

Do you not see the casualties?

The answer should be none,

But humans are not arithmetic

And Your book still says none.

But don’t you see the bodies?

Of the dead you left behind?

Because you simply

Ignored the wars

The wars inside our minds.

 

But there is no war, not in your book.

For you need a death you can see,

For casualties to equal one-

Even though they equal infinity.

 

For you can’t see death unless you feel-

And You can’t feel until you see.