Thu, 12/04/2014 - 19:21 -- shel

It’s 10am
I am smiling at my sleeping lover, his daughter curled up next to him, so tiny and vulnerable.
I am thinking about you, all rough edges and fiery eyes.
It’s 10:18 and I think I don’t belong in their beautiful life, everyone knows I am an imposter of her dead mother.
I am thinking she died for the same reasons I want to,
so maybe I’m doing it right.
It’s 10:22am
and I call you, you’re calling me sweets and speaking in soft, slick tongues that my soul can understand.
It’s sometime before noon, I still cannot eat or sleep.
I listen for the sound of the vodka, but it slips down my throat as whisper quiet as I slipped out of my clothes.

My dreams and my lies are all about you, but you are all about me.
All three of you are still just here for me,
and I only ever wanted to be gone.



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