alcohol abuse
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I hate the way my mother looks at me.
The look of the “least favorite daughter.”
Most little girls feared monsters under the bed, while I feared the ones over the bottle.
Writing this poem
So I can finally tell you how I feel
Sorry that sometimes you don't want to deal
With all my trauma and emotions
What I gotta do take a whole bottle just for you
To realize I'm hurtin
Elderly man asleep in the hospital bed
Moving so slightly
His respirations become
the only sign
He is not dead
I move his feet back in the bed
as they slide out every now and then
I struggled
I drank, I cut, I had no will to live
I over came but did the others?
One drinks
He says one more
He says he won’t drive
There once was a man named Daedalus
Known as a dentist of excellence
He sampled some Vicodin
Now he’s imprisoned in
A habit of common excrescence
A habit which started with booze
Her father sat a cold beer on the table in front of her.She was only but a small thing,But her father loves to test her.
Ten years old,
Wearing a medical mask In ICU.
Seeing your Father,
Your best friend,
Slipping away.
He suffers from
His liver corroding
From trying to combat
The alcohol he drinks.
Daddy is drinking again. Mama is too.
Sister and brother, too little to understand. I'm eight, aren't I little, too?
Hard ground, river roaring as daddy is snoring.
When do we sleep in a house with a real bed?
Becoming
“Wow, you never ask for help
You’re mature beyond your years”
under all that calmness
My body’s full of tears
For lack of better words
You instill and distill my love
Like alcohol in a glass.
Bitter and dangerous,
But still on these streets.
You use me like a drunk
And I’ve got no choice.
All I want to do is lay here and stay ;
Thy kindest hearts always pray for a change ;
But God don't answer when the skies are gray;
The child inside me cries for no long range .
Driving can be fun,
But not if you are done.
Driving and booze do not mix
As impairing brains does not fix.
You think you do not matter?
It pays to not create pancake batter.
To the alcohol dissolving my family
Thanks for everything
Thank you for the worry of becoming them
You always go down stairs.
You say its the only escape.
You say its my fault.
Im only 12 dad how come Im the reason you drink?
You say I never wanted you. You are a mistake, and always will be.
It started with pain in her bellyHer vision became blurryHer legs refused to listen to her mindThe pain, the physical painunbearableHer handsClumsybut not too clumsy to pour a drink
You were so good to me Spiriytus.
You whispered to me “Go ahead you can do it,”
To tell her how I feel
Oh, how I loved her.
How I loved you.
We would talk for hours her and I.
Four months ago
From the beginning you were mine
I was yours
It was perfect
We were perfect
You were perfect
When I was 4 years old, I had a dream that I was caught up in a net hanging from the mast of the Jolly Roger.
Whiskey is like liquid death in a bottle.
The man is excided to see the newborn bottle of whiskey in his hands
His addiction is uncontrollable when the bottle is empty
People find that he smells of death itself
I wish this wasn’t something in my life
But when someone else does it, it becomes my strife.
You crack another can open; I feel it cut into my soul.
I won’t keep the sorrow unspoken; dying must be your goal.
Moon-kissed windows,
projecting the oblivious melancholic sight
of those who shine bright, and
time-blessed gravity defyers
dancing to a rhythm of lust,
like blooming roses in the sun.
Sleeping with a Habit
In the morning we joke and thank the world that there is only one of you.
You may think it, but it isn't worth it
I'm getting pretty sick of your shit
You've got friends, family, someone to love
But away with all that for liquor you shove
Pour it down the drain
Its my senior year
High school or college you can decide
Not like i can remember either one
I find myself waking up on some stranger’s bathroom floor
Maybe my own
“You’re not that good of a sister you know, if you were a better role model, I wouldn’t be like this” and right there, I began to question my purpose. What was I here for? Am I supposed to be the guide in her life or live my own?
Your question is what does alcohol mean to me?
Im willing to risk my families sanity
Acting stupid drinking and driving with no regard for Humanity
what does alcohol mean to me?
Trapped in his own asylum
Letting fumes take hold of his lungs
Booze takes over his brain
Like a video control game.
Midnight thoughts
Rake at his mind
Like jubilation
Being exiled.
Puff, Puff
Inhale
Puff, Puff
Inhale.
Sip your whiskey,
how does it taste?
Like the tears I've cried over your abandonment?
Like the gravel I've paced back and forth on,
"It's Not My Fault"
That should be your epitaph,
You've certainly said it often enough,
So everyone knows your life was rough,
Excuses you use solely on your behalf,
Like "It's Not My Fault!"
Drunken blackguards stumbled out of seedy, dimly-lit pubs at all hours of the night; all manner of men jostled and bumped one another in their passing. Streetlights flickered, shivered, and swayed against the piercing chill of the breeze.
Could tea be my new alcohol?
I would let it fool me that I am warm
I would drink it as it burned down my throat
I would let it take control
Because for awhile, a very short while
happiness is notat the bottom of a bottleI don't know whyyou continue to search there
who told youto look hereand why did youbelieve them?
My father once said to me,
“If a rule seems stupid, Lourdes, it’s probably there
Because some idiot did something stupid, and now you’re all
Paying the price.”
It couldn’t have been more than a year after that
They say that drinking is only for fun
And no one can get hurt or it won’t go too far.
I don’t think anyone can imagine
Your brother coming home, drunk.
4114
May I speak to Amanda Willard please?
Click
4114
May I speak to Amanda Willard please?
Just a moment.
I feel you latch onto my fingers
I feel your warmth overcome me
I’m so comfortable with you
Dependency begins to overcome me
Seldom I feel that I can live without you
Saturday nights I love you best
On March 19th I went to a party
accompanied by my first love; my soul getter
I trusted him
This man I equated as an angel on earth
So when I drank too much
As a way to not feel depressed,
Or maybe it was oppressed.
The fifth grade was only a start,
As a senior I still feel its mark.
My mother felt the bottle or aluminum can was an escape
You open your eyes around noon
The thinnest ray of sunlight peeks into your room
You feel like your head is on upside down
You’re walking on the ceiling
80 proof poured down his throat.
A captain on the bottle…
Demon water in his body
Perception muddled
Judgment kaput
Steps turned to stumbles.
Three in the morning
I’m honestly stupid about shit
been close to incarcerated
my arm been lacerated
on morphine for the stupidest reason
And promised I wouldn’t do it ever
I never asked you for the world.
Didn't need you to give me anything but your love...
But apparently,
I was asking for too much.
“One more,” I whispered to myself as I pressed the cold glass to my lipsA noise from the other room disrupted my temporary calmness
Dropping cocktail names because they sound so sweet
Auntie's house last night too easy, score some at the meet
In my old best friend's bedroom
drunk and stoned out of my head
I keep lighting myself on fire
again and again in her bed.
Every time, it burns
and every time, I scream
but once it's out, I light it again
The faint smell
Of tobacco. That hated smell,
Forever fused into
Skin, sheets and Mind.
Last night,
Every flashing light
Every piercing shriek
Every bass note from the
If you break my heart, I will rip you up and apart.
You painted me a picture. You made art.
Like light, you disappear when it's dark,
And our goodbye has left an ugly scar.
It’s 10amI am smiling at my sleeping lover, his daughter curled up next to him, so tiny and vulnerable.
Every time I see the scars on your arm,
The self-inflicted burn wounds
That resulted from a drunken night
Full of angst and hurt after your girlfriend
Broke up with you,
We're here at the start; step one and step two.
A gun in her hand; she doesn't know what to do.
He stands at the door; his fists balled up tight.
She cries in silent, while he threatens her life.
Finishing a case of beer was never a problem for you
As you always practiced emptying the bottles during your free time.
The different you that I despised came out as you became drunk.
There's little to say
about man and his many ways.
About how happiness and hurt
can be the same.
How a 'I love you' and
'I thought you loved me'
could be twisted in meaning
Nick was a young man with an eager heart
that he gave away willingly
to the kind natured Sarah
They planned out their lives
each second with each other
and with him came a boy
with wide eyes so blue
Run.Run. How Far…
How far till it’s there
Until the destination is reached
Run. Run. Heart beat in your ears
Endorphins drown your brain
Body feels weightless
Run. Run. The soles of your feet
Why do I write?
I write to live and I write to breathe
And to tell the stories that many aren't able to speak
The thoughts that the pen provokes the paper to say
Allows one voice to be the voice of many
Look at these teens as cute as can be
The Jock, The Princess, and the Brain all three
set the lead perfect little lives
With their perfect little friends
In their perfect little house just ‘round the bend.
Call it a crisis, call it a curse,
How sad a song to sum of my life in a verse.
Fuck it; there's one thing I know to settle the score,
But you're better than that,
Or so they say, how the hell would they know anyway?
To some you are the problem
yet he views you as the solution
your burn extinguishes a fire within.
He fails to see
you're only the answer for tonight.
Sitting all alone.
Thinking it may be your last night.
The phone rings but you can’t talk without a slur.
You cry because you can’t take think without a kink.
You had smiling people around – how can you feel so alone?
The last time I saw you without the jaws of I.V.s clamped onto your arms,
and without the yellow tinge to your skin,
and without you fading away from me...
The last time I saw you was two months ago,
