Thoughts from a plane

As I sit staring at the "fasten seatbelt" light overhead

I can feel the endless possibilities of places I could go, people I could meet.

Today you asked me "you feel miserable here a lot don't you?"

You've never been more right.

And as I sit here on this damn plane in your damn sweatshirt I wonder if you know.

I wonder if you know how scared I am

of all the opportunities the fasten seatbelt light brings me.

Of all the opportunities you bring me.

I swear the way you look at me

while I'm in the passenger seat of your beat up car

on the way to the dinner that you'll buy me

and I'll pretend not to care about

is the same way I look at Columbia and blank notebooks.

The possibilities and beautiful what-ifs are spelled out

in the whites, blacks, and multiples shades of brown in your eyes.

And I am thinking to myself how beautiful this fasten your seat belt light is

but I am also thinking of how beautiful you are

and how you've never been given the chances or opportunities you deserve.

So as I sit here stirring in my just barely big enough seat

I am feeling things that not even the damien rice in my ears can suppress.

I am seeing every beautiful night I spent wishing I never had to go home.

I'm seeing all the miles you put on just wanting to talk to me a little longer.

I'm seeing the way you nod your head back in forth

and tap on your steering wheel to the beat

of your latest favorite pop punk song.

And I am seeing the tremble in my knee that you don't notice

when you say that my laugh instantly makes you smile

because in all reality every waking moment I spent frowning at you

was because I was hoping that if I convinced myself

that we were no good then you would believe it too.

I realize all these things as I sit in seat 20E

on a delayed flight to Orlando

and all I want to do is parachute down to whatever tiny

secluded unknown cafe you're spending your evening jamming

to a local set of bands drinking something fruity you've never tried before.

And just like that drink I want to run down your throat

to the deepest parts of your gut

and permeate through your blood stream.

I want to run like oxygen infused flames through your system.

I'm still sitting in this cramped seat on damien song number five

staring at this fasten seatbelt light and all the possibilities

and I just have one thing to say: fasten your seatbelt with me.

Fasten your seatbelt and see all the possibilities that I see.

Fasten your seat belt and move three states closer to that dream

you've been dreaming since we were neighbors on that worn down block

where we learned to hate our parents.

Fasten your seatbelt and run away with me.


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