Is that what I'm doing called?

Going into my situations optimistic,

Hope, a shield as I enter battle

only to be dashed to pathetic pieces

by reality?

Picking back up,

loosely stitching myself up until I'm whole again

only to fall apart at the seams

as I recognize my failure?

Failure that so thouroughly unravels

the rug of the future I've been weaving so long?

                     Chasing the sun,

hoping time will favor me and give me

hope....again.

I don't want to feel broken up inside 

anymore