Playing with the Dead
Playing with the Dead
He didn’t know what “dead” was. Not really
He didn’t know what “God” or “Heaven” or “Hell” was
But he knew about rocks
he liked the rocks
The park was littered with them.
grey granite tally marks
each documenting a life
Atop one of them, A bird girl made of stone
looked at the ground under her feet
hands outstretched and open
He raised his hand showing her a small
caliche covered pebble
When she didn’t take it,
he threw it at her and laughed
I watched him for a while
playing with the dead
“What’s all dees rocks for mama?”
He couldn’t read,
but he knew somehow
these rocks were different
they had a meaning
they were “for” something
My heart paused before it
wrapped around a reply
I felt he could understand
“When a person dies,
their family buries them in the ground
Then they put the person’s name on a rock.
When they visit, they remember
the person who died,
and how much they loved them.”
His big blue eyes widened
like a gate
blown open by
an unseasonably strong
western wind
His innocence
escaped momentarily
like an over excited puppy
straying a bit too far
from the yard
And something unfamiliar
made its way in
something foreign
worn, and old
He looked all around him
counting all the tallies.
Tears escaped
and pooled in his dimples
I tried to wrap my arms around
his tiny frame
to comfort him
to let him know he was safe.
I tried to keep
his innocence
locked behind the gate
but I was too late
he ran
rejecting my embrace
and sat down in solidarity
with the rocks
Mary Grace Parker
2003-2005
Beloved Daughter
Taken too soon
Those too small fingers traced the letters
Like he did in school when
he learned to spell his name
He didn’t know what sound the shapes made
But he knew they were hers
He lowered his lips close to the grass
and whispered something to reassure her.
In that moment, he knew what death was
not like a child playing make believe
falling down when daddy
pretends to be the bad guy
But instead
like a living thing that knows
what it means to be fragile
and finite
He closed his eyes
and patted her on the head
as if to say
“You’ll be okay”
He took a deep breath
calling his innocence back inside
his baby blue eyes
he closed the gate
and shooed away
the old, worn, foreign visitor
telling him to come back
on a different day
His innocence
cozied up next to his heart
and returned him to me
unharmed
“Mama, we need get doc-der,
he fix all da rock people!”