Lost

I’m losing myself.
Searching for guys to use me,
exploiting myself has become my new hobby.
The shame i feel, the pain I go through,
it is what i deserve.
I don’t deserve love, like my friends.
I deserve to be alone and hurt.
That’s just the way I am.
I am not pure and beautiful like them,
I am damaged and torn.
I have had my heart ripped from my chest,
never to be returned.
I struggle to get out of bed each day,
to face to world without you by my side.
So I turn to self-destruction,
as my only comfort.
The pain reassures me,
I am still alive.
But baby, i am so lost.

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