The Light of My Life

I wobble my way down the narrow hallway
my thoughts are an epic mess
the bright light I'm following is so far away
yet I feel I can grasp it I must confess.

At the age of fifteen, I only have two choices to hold
a beer can in one hand
and a stack of paper ready to fold
these were the choices, this was my stand.

But drugs only stopped the pain
of the slits and so called accidents from before
and let's not mention the body distortion; weight gain
also the teasing towards the "whore".

It didn't start there
started at the age of seven
when blood dripped down from my pants, playing wasn't fair
oh how I wished to just go to heaven.

I didn't want to play those nasty games
where daddy touched my sacred treasures
and called me names
let me fly away with birds and feathers?

Psychologist and Psychiatrist came in the picture once he left
the healing process began
but my innocence was stolen, that theft!
that can't be a true man.

At the age of seventeen
things got better for me, a doll like girl
until fire arose in my home destroying all I had seen
over a month in time everything was in a swirl!

What else can go wrong?
as the "Raven" once quothed, nevermore
because I am strong
writing poetry for colleges and so much more.

And now I am 18
power over mind and mind over power
and all I want you to see is what I have seen
reach the light, now is the hour!


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