I can’t remember when she last said

“I love you”

And I can’t remember when

“Good night” turned into

“You’re late again.”

And I can’t remember the last time

There was a smile on her face

when speaking to me

And I can’t remember when

“How was your day?”

Became “When do you work next?”

I don’t know the last time I came home

And didn’t barricade myself behind closed doors and

Headphones and an infinite wall of “homework” and “studying” and “friends”

Just to escape the possibility of interaction

And I can’t remember the last time I genuinely

Wanted to spend a day

An hour

A minute

With her.

And I can’t recall the last time I went shopping with her

And didn’t hear the words

Plus size

Too fat

Diet

Die

Because those are the only words I remember

And I can’t remember the last time

We sat down to dinner and

I didn’t think about how much I was eating

And I can’t remember the last time

I looked in the mirror and thought

I

Am

Happy