who am i today?

a disarray of traits to have and things to be. this is a game i play

over and over - unravelling the me that came that's new from yesterday.

 

represent me as a fire.

the higher the flame, the more energy required

hotter and hotter, i’ll burn through a personality

today i’ll have an ambitious, overactive mentality

excitable, sociable, agreeable, manical

today i’ll feel capable, forget that i’m breakable

i’m an overachiever, an overeager dreamer

i can do anything, everything, a better thrill the bigger

unrelentless, unapologetic, i have no chill

i will not stop. i will run til i’m empty.

full of irritability, instability, impulsivity,

full of hyperactivity, unconcerned with staying healthy

i won’t go to sleep because i want to stay this me

i’ll want to be wonderful, while i forget that i’m worn

and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn, and i’ll burn

 

and it doesn't have to be a huge whirl of wind

it takes just a whisp of chagrin;

and the fire is extinguished.

i wake up the next day undistinguished.

today i’m indifferent.

a fire becomes ashes, and i’m distant,

shy, quiet, no passion.

smaller and smaller. i’m paralytic and passive.

my will to keep going slowly diminished.

writing this stanza’s almost too hard to finish.