It started with shakes and the violent pounding.

The floor boards matching the beat inside my ribcage.

Japan was beautiful. And it was the shaking that stirred such a thought.

This pounding, caused by many things in my past. 

Weary and dry relationships in the west that filled my head with deadly quakes.

Alone with the quaking, noone could see from the outside.

Kuuki

they can you read the air here. they feel my quakes.

scared of judgement, they allowed me to rest my shaking body.

Tanned men in orange. Beads on wrists and minds of truth.

I took their cement and mixed it by hand to form my path.

the path he made blue prints for.

It was grueling, I even cried not able to shut down the shaking at first. Go in silence he said.

And so I did and it was worth it.

worth every fight.

Worth every minute of my struggle with peace.

But its here, its been here all along.

I am free

I am balanced

I am happy

I am buddhist.