I long for the feeling of being myself
Will this ever stop?
Thoughts are racing,
Slowly but surely I’m becoming more and more of myself,
And each step I take,
I’m forced to take several steps back.
I can’t look down on myself,
The demons just get too painful to bear.
My body doesn’t reflect me,
And that’s more than enough to make me go crazy.
I long for the day that people call my right name,
The day that I can finally sit down and be who I want to be,
Instead of this puppet I’m portraying,
Mother tells me to be a girl,
Father tells me to suck it up and be a girl.
I can’t do this any more–
Lyrics flow through my earbuds,
Calmly telling me to just,
“Wait for it”
That, “I am the one thing in life I can control.”
I am an original.
There’s no need to listen to people tell me how to live my life anymore.
Because I am the one thing I can control,
So I’m going to fight that war.
The battleground inside of me
Is one filled with strength.
And dysphoria is the enemy,
Let’s sit back and watch what happens.