I see her

The drunk girl 

Happily stumbling into each friend

Smile wide

Eyes just a bit too glossy

 

She’s happy.

She’s drunk.

Not a care in the world.

 

I envy her

I wish to be her

I worry for her

 

I worry what those “friends” will do

Or rather what they won’t do

 

Will they help her into the Uber?

Will they leave her here with that creep,

The creep that’s been eyeing her for an hour

 

Will they hold back her hair,

Later tonight when this happiness works its way back up her throat, bringing hot stinging tears to her eyes?

Will they keep her safe?

 

Will they leave her? 

Like those “friends” left that one girl, that one night?

 

They left her,

A girl from out of town,

Alone,

Alone with no wallet, and no phone.

 

She was drunk

Confused

She was looking for them! 

“No, I need to find my friends!” She pleaded

Pleaded, as I tried to lead her somewhere safe.

 

It broke my heart.

Telling her,

Telling her, that her “friends” left

I watched them walk right out the door

Right out the door!

 

It’s as though she was deaf to my words

They didn’t make sense

Her happiness

Her drunken world couldn’t perceive it

Couldn’t let it darken the happiness 

 

So while I long to be this

This happy, carefree, joyous being

I worry for the girl I see being it

I worry for her soul

 

The fragile thing wrapped in her body

The body weakened by a fruity drink

Weakened by the desire to have fun

Let loose

Dance a little

 

A normal desire

Made dangerous,

Riddled with a background full of anxiety 

Banging softly

Reminding you not to be her

 

Reminding you not to let your armor get too soft

Reminding you of the beautiful, yet delicate soul, wrestling to escape through those loose drunken lips

Reminding you, you’re never really safe

Friends or “friends”

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