Empty inside

Hollow and wanting, waiting

Waiting to feel something wanting to feel anything

I do feel

Feeling only pain and anger

Loss and sadness in the dark, lost and alone

The light opens and I seek it to feel and know again

To know what it’s like to be a human

To know what its like not to be a monster

Fear consumes everything Scared to sleep

Afraid that all I can do is cause pain.

Nothing feels real, why can’t I wake up

Wanting only to feel

To feel what it’s like to be human to not feel like

What I have become a monster, serving only one

Serving the monster in all of us serving the darkness,

All consuming the end, Un-wanting unknowing

What it is to feel, to feel like a human

Only knowing death and pain

Only knowing what its like, to be a monster

The one you fear the one that I am

I am not a human I was created in war

Forged from death, Made from fear

Shown the beauty and destruction of war

Reliving it every day

Friends dying, Enemies dead

Pain from all around

Forging the monster within, forging what I am

Forming the empty darkness that is in all of us