Bothered and Bewildered

You stand beside me and try to hold my hand

The warmth of you sets my mind wandering

The way your whole face smiles before your mouth does

cracks a glow-stick in my belly and the outside world fades like

wet cotton candy

What I'm always on the edge of saying is I love you

I'm not afraid to say so until I'm looking in your eyes and the truth is too real

I want more than anything to let you love me the way you would

With kisses and cuddles and time but

the clock moves like a demon when it thinks your having too much fun

A two hour movie ends in a flash and not nearly enough love has taken place

My hand gets sweaty and you're gone before I can register the empty seat


Why are you leaving?

You must know how insane you make me feel

Isn't that enough to maybe make you regret?

I regret the moment I let myself smile at you

because that was the moment everything I know stopped and

you started


Strange to think the best thing in my life so far brings me to my knees,

deflowers my hair and pinches my ass

Is it clear that I'm too young to understand these?


It's times like this when my favorite joy decides to fly away that I resort to

insincere and overly defensive

Don't ask me what's wrong unless you want to know it's you

that sent me off the edge with your pretty warmth and teddy bear grin

It was all to wonderful for me


That's the way I died


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