I was so open,

Legs open, 

Heart open,

But mind closed to the idea of

Your deception.

Of

How you

Looked me in my face

Said give you taste 

But I didn’t know

This love 

Would be 

Poison.

Now I need medicine.

Got me questioning 

My sanity 

Of if you actually care for

Me

Or was I 

Just another vanity 

For your

“Fun time

For a short time”

Collection.

I thought we could be each other’s blessings.

Then hit with the reality of

Rejection.

Forced to learn 

This lesson.

 

That love is not

Selfish,

Spiteful,

Or 

Mistrusting.

It’s 

Patient, 

Honest,

& 

Forgiving.

 

With that being said,

I’ve let go of my hurt

Of being played 

Like an Orchestra;

Paraded like a clown for your circus.

Surly,

Acting must’ve of

Been his profession.

Because I was costar.

Now I got to love from afar.

 

I’ve let go of my anger.

I won’t blame my emotions for

Reacting to your actions.

But I must say “I bust the windows out

Your car” has a new ring to it.

To think that a car is more valuable 

Than me.

I can’t let these thoughts take my power 

Knowing I’m better

Than being this sour.

Instead,

I’ve accepted that my guard was down

with the wrong guy in town. 

And that this was not love 

Only

Pure deception.

To be Lead on

When I just wanted the best for you.

Now you’ve lost me

With my heart and mind

On the same page.