I have to wonder,

now that you're with another,

where does that leave me,

who am i to say that i am better than she,

who am i,

all those feelings rattling around my chest,

where do they go now when they can't leave my head,

and was it my fault,

did i somehow cause you to leave,

I fear that fear kept me from truth,

I fear that truth kept me kept me from you,

Betrayal or Anger,

Confusion and Loneliness.

 

Yet

Hope and Freedom can't help but set in,

I don't feel free,

I don't feel happy for you,

You look at me and don't comprehend,

you live in the perfect between,

but i am stuck here on the sand,

not forward or back,

locked in what now seems eternal,

but i know it will end,

if only i could convince my heart of what my head already understands,

that is my hope,

some sort of end,

whether new for me or old for you,

but for now i can't hope for that,

not when i know that you are a happy two,

so why can't i be if only for you,

i want to be able to feel something too,

and even sadness is something to feel,

rather than just being stuck right here,

here where i am constantly

questioning and wondering,