anxiety attack
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The loud noisein my eyesin my mindRoaring and growling
The noise won’t stopIt haunts and tricks medriving me to the edgeof insanity.
Over and overWhat if?What if?What if?
Dear Life,
The hand of cards you dealt me.
It's been tough
Anxiety, panic attacks
a hospital visit for it
Why can't I be normal?
Is it that I'm so smart
that I should have these flaws?
As I walk into the room, I put my head to the floor
Their thoughts and expressions im trying so hard to ignore
What people think of me is a burden I always bare
Im shaking with nervousness hoping they don't stare
My world is crashing, I start to cry.
I feel as if I’m going to die.
My thoughts are racing, I cannot think.
My life’s a mess, a tragedy.
Heart starts pumping, I cannot breath.
A small bottle
A brush
Heavy paper
Covered in crevices
And teeth
Pressure
It takes pressure
Skin,
vibrating with fear
of the unknown.
Lungs,
heaving shaky
puffs of air.
Eyes,
shifting side to side
looking for an escape.
Fists,
Nobody tells you about the utter destruction your own mind can do to you
It chews up everything you come into contact with
You think you can go just one day without the cages coming down on you?
Eighth grade: The first time I remember feeling
That attack of anxiety consume me
Making my heart freeze, my body tense, my mind frantic.
Like a storm it passed:
Last year, I thought I was getting smaller,
but, in 2017, I've been standing taller.
My friends and family have been there
when my anxiety has been too much to bear.
Anxiety has been there in the beginning,
We are all just trying to find out place in the world.
From being overtaken by demons,
To becoming free men,
We all share a moments of weaknesses.
The air feels thick and there’s a weight on my chest.
It’s getting harder to breath has seconds pass.
Not matter how hard I try,
I can’t seem to get the weight off.
I am now struggling to breathe.
It's like an earthquake.
The world shifts around you,
Shaking your heart, shaking your mind,
Shaking your control until it crumbles away
Leaving you both helpless and defenseless,
The day is like any other day
At least it starts like that
But then the weight in my stomach drops like a dead weight
And I know that this day will be anything but OK.
Say no more,
because the raven says, "Never more".
Tis I who has your tongue,
now you shall stay silent.
The numbered days are no longer numbered.
Hush.
I'm not all the way here.
Two steps, quick look. Smile.
Count two, three. Faded frown.
Four, person number five; skip the next pace.
Scour the hall; fearful to see his face.
Imgine, still. Burning hazel eyes;
Slam.
Mommy is lying on the ground. Daddy threw her there; I saw it from behind
The wooden banister which I wrapped my stuffed snake around
Only three hours before.
My name is
[gasp] a soft percussion of wiggles, delicate worms crawling into skin
thin kisses, so you’re not at all suspicious when I carry in your ribs
bids on who the lastonelaughing [is]
debris made of stardust trinkles past the cracksin my fingersbroken, jagged jigsawsof velvet skythat flows to my eyes hidingbehind my open handsin a makeshift shieldagainst the nature
