' 'Abuse' 'toxic relationships’; depression ; death ; imagery ; suicide

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1980's was the time, Mental illness in family, To talk about it , Was a crime.   Grew up totally alone, No one to turn too, No helpline, No mobile phone.   Kept sadness,
My stomach is pulsating… Oh, what a lovely sight… Covered in my own blood, Sprawled on your kitchen floor in the early twilight.   Light fading quick
why are there a spider now im pernoid help  me six nine wants to kill me i dont want to die please help me theres now a mouse in my room that stole my cheese theres a big spider now im gonna run
And so goes the final bit,Another quick bow as I indulge another hit I have a noose that’s been sitting inside my closet Three months in,And I don’t know, I don’t know
i am of wounds,cuts,scars from the frontand some to the back  
I am not Athlete A I am not one of the survivors I am just one of hundreds who knew it would come.   I remember you screaming at me
I Can’t Breathe (Without You) I can’t breathe then I feel you around me  I can’t breathe then I feel you around I can’t breathe then I feel you
  The shaking from head to toes, the drug demeaning, the depth of the hollow bones. It keeps you staring into oblivion, 
I always wanted to feel you at full brightness I wanted you to hit me full frontal Full force Run into me And take me down with you
of all the people i want to kill, and your name is pretty close to the top of the list, the person i want to kill most of all: Myself.
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