Sexual abuse happens to as many as 1 in 3 females and 1 in 4 males before the age of 18.Dissociation is one of the common coping mechanism of abuse. This poem tells the reader of a sexually abusive account (minimal detail) then leads into the survivors dissociation, and disconnection from her body. It later shows the survivors mental health transformation and re-connection with her body by realizing its worth.

 

Felt his hands crawling on your back and up your short hair with bangs tickling your eyes.

His shirt came off and your eyes widened in confusion because he is daddy's friend and your'e only seven.

You twisted, clenched and tightened up unknowingly anticipating the dreaded touch that forever scars your heart.

You endured all of that and all of me sitting there silently not knowing what to do.

 

I left you then and went far far away from you, him, the room, the house.

I went to gardens with poppies and pretended to skip down the yellow brick road.

I visited Marry Poppins, The Three Little Pigs and saw the wolf blow one of their houses down.

You stayed throughout this patiently waiting for me to return even though you did not know when or how.

 

Ten years pass and I and wear sore feet from all the poppy trampling and fairytale visits.

I live with you and find myself clutching onto you until I gasp in overwhelming emotion,

I pray you do not leave me, 

For I will not leave you again.

For if I do, I will vanish in the whoosh of air into nothingness.

Everything I have is yours,

My brown eyes, long wavy blond hair, my strong five senses, my motor skills, and intellect.

 

Contain my lungs, liver, spleen, and heart.

Protect my brain, cells, nerves, and nervous system.

For I will fall apart without you, 

I will slip away into pools of dust that blows in the storm, lands on the ground, and seeps into freshly baked body of earth.

 

Forget me none, I never forget you.

With your seven layers and possibility of one degree, two degree, and three degree burns.

You are my integument, my skin and never shall we part,

In sickness and health, I will be there.