Do you even realize how much you hurt me?

How much damage you have caused?

And you have the audacity to come back

After two whole years of torment

Two whole years of fear

Calling, texting, messaging, stalking,

Your sly slick smile still slithering in the dark

Haunting me.

Will you ever stop?

 

I remember the the feeling of the cold hard floor

against my bruised bare back

and the smell of cinnamon that lingered

on your sweat glazed skin.

I remember your calloused hand over my mouth 

to muffle my sound 

as you forced yourself inside me

your deep set brown eyes baring into my soul

your venomous words like poison.

 

I felt like a prisoner inside your world

having no self outside you. 

Living off your compliments

Dying from your criticism. 

You became my reason for being. 

 

Just hearing your name brings it all back

Your white knuckles still hot 

thrashing through my scratched up skin.

Bare back Bleeding

Hair pulling-name calling-

Beaten, battered, broken, and bruised.

Tattered and used.

This shadow of a girl is what I’ve become.

 

Do you even care?

 

 

Yet Standing here on my front porch,

You have finally found me,

And you’re not here to play games.

Smirking at the sight of my terror,

You caress your hands around the nape of my neck

Your grip getting tighter and tighter.

And the cycle continues

Over

And over

And over.