I don't mean to be blunt~like forced traumaor display myself up for you~dioramafor you to get this how I feelthere is no appealwaking up like a wind-upbecause everyday I wind-ipin these same situationspessimistic contemplationsevery day and the day afterthis stranger called defeaning laughterI'm in my presentthinking about my pastWorrying about my futurere-reading the last chapterbecause I have this stigmaconstant enigmaof how to escape this~Robert was rightthis road wasn't well paved