How many tests have I failed without even knowing

Grades posted on walls that I’ll never see

For each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction

Every single move is pencil to paper

And I’m failing

 

I can’t show that I care

Because I don’t even know how to start

And when I fail to plan or speak

The only person left standing is

Self-hatred

 

I don’t even deserve to be in this class

Everyone else knows infinitely more

About how to show they care

And I’m just lonely, by my own doing,

And I’m sorry for letting you down

 

Again and again and again

I will internalize this feeling

So I can be better tomorrow

I desperately want to be

What makes you confident

 

So I’m sorry that I’m not