Sinking Ship


United States
35° 54' 18.738" N, 97° 23' 41.5752" W

I never know what to say when I need to

I only know that this feeling inside is tearing me apart,

I can’t do

I won’t do

I will never do

I hold these things very close to my heart

If only the truth, could set me free

You’d know exactly what’s on my mind,

you’d know how you hurt me this time

It just keeps on happening

This pain is maddening

For some reason I count on it, because it always seems to last

This hurt, knows where to hit me and it always strikes fast

Leaving the darkness as something I can easily recognize

It becomes stronger when you antagonize

Even after the blow, it consumes me even more so,

You don’t understand that your regrets, your fears, and your disappointments are always piled on my back

Over time, this load gets too heavy to hold and I just collapse.

To notice, not a chance, because you refuse feel these emotions for yourself,

I’m sorry, it’s not working, we can’t just put them on a shelf

So we go along and pretend everything’s fine

To be honest, my soul aches from all of the emotions you left behind

Nobody deals with them, nobody takes time to confront them, we pretend to be blind

This is why this ship is sinking

There are chips and cracks, we have failed to see, and now that a big wave has hit us, I can’t believe.

Our number one problem is money?

The crack goes deeper than that because it’s wrecked our ship,

You take all this frustration out on us, and wonder why we dipped?

Even if we had all the money in the world, you’d find I still can’t open up to you

If I could leave as soon as possible, I would.

Be a weight off your back

Let you be free from all the things I lack

I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry

But these words mean nothing

They never help anything.

You don’t believe them.

And I can’t prove it to you unless I’m dead.

Maybe this will work, maybe you’ll understand, that I’m trying so hard to grow as fast as I can

But it never seems to be enough, I always seem to get stuck

I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry

I’m trying really hard to tell to you, that we can improve our luck.

If you open your mind, you can open your eyes

You said that once, we can fix the problem if we really try.

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