Scribbles and Scratches

Papier-mâché remnants 

Past reflections of everything I used to be

I am NOT the blank paper I once was

Not because I didn't write my story

It was subtly eroded 

lack of self care

lack of self preservation

who could I blame but myself?

I can't blame the designer for my fatal paper flaw

Can I?

In this paper thin skin that I live 

Should I take the time to laminate myself

seems obtuse I thought

Why laminate things 

that are destined to be destroyed?

Though my skin is paper thin

I do not possess these paper thin emotions

That ever other paper person does

instead they are that of oceans 

drowning the paper girl

In type font and heavy paper worry

The fibers that compose that paper thin girl 

Start to separate from one another during the storm she weathers

 

 

carbon paper girl

different from the rest

She understands my movements

wringing out my wet paper arms

I crumple at the sight of my wet paper self

Yet the bonds of the paper somehow become stronger

as if the water that seeped through gave them room to grow

Room to breathe

That paper thin girl can finally breathe 

She takes out her paper thin heart

and she gently gives it one last squeeze

It finally restarts thump thump

It has been restarted by each mended thread

That paper thin girl finally gets her shot at being 

something more than wet soggy paper

she gets a chance at change 

A biological and metaphorical change

The change that was always inside of her

waiting for the right metaphase to occur

Waiting for her moment

Waiting for a moment of rain