Numb
One word and I’m all yours
But you don’t even know it
Bring on these confusing thoughts
And how I know I’m getting ahead of myself once more
I think of a future
Even though our friendship has just begun
It’s just an act of kindness
It always has been
How close you get doesn’t matter
How playful you get is just a game
Yet I can’t help but bring my hopes up
And that’s what hurts the most
You see I’ve been in this state before
Many, many times
You and the others have come along
And I’m attracted in some way
His heart is pure gold
His eyes are the deepest moss green
Your gestures are not obscene
Everything pulls me in like a trap
Every time I try to get out it doesn’t work
That song plays and I’m stuck
It replays in my ears like a joke
One day when I admit this to you
Or to the next one that crosses my path
I want you to help me
Because this habit has got to stop
You’re not mine to mess with
We aren’t even anything
Yet
And yet I feel a connection in your absence
Meaning there is nothing there at all
I can go along with it and have fun
But what will happen in the end?
What will happen when it ends?
And I find another
And you find someone new
There I go again in swiftness
Getting lost by my own thoughts and uncertainty