For my MOTHER (Part 1)

Since I became truly aware,

filled to the point of overflow

with the knowledge of my surroundings,

you have been a constant reminder of the things I cannot have.



Didn't you hear your fiends when they told you

how their daughters are allowed to date and have friends.

You moved me to this town and expected me to become a nun.


Chastity because of the people that I supposedly shouldn't be around.

You say they aren't good enough.

You say I should make better choices.

You say he isn't worthy.


Guess What Bitch!

He didn't come from nor does he live in this shitty town.

He doesn't want to strip away my innocence.

He doesn't EXPECTmy body.


Guess What Bitch!


He  plans to be a fucking veternarian.

He is my friend.

He is NOT my boyfirend. Not yet anyways.


Guess What Bitch!

I didn't lie to you.

I didn't ditch my firends (remember, I'm not allowed to have any).

I didn't whore around.


Guess What Bitch!


I will not deviate from my plans just to be "his woman"

I am his friend.

I am NOT his girlfriend. Not yet anyways.


You have isolated me to a point that 

I will break under the pressure

You say if I "lie" to you again 

I will not have help through college.


So because I want to be normal

I shouldn't be allowed to do anything.

Never any friends, Never any boyfriend (at least not that you discovered),

Never went to prom, Never kissed a GUY.


Sad thing is this isn't the last curveball.

Sad thing is this isn't the worst curveball.

Sad thing is you're too self-involved to realize.

Sad thing is I wish you knew it all so maybe you'd understand. 




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