I've never had an owner                                        Yelped, whined..those didn't work

And you've never had a pet                                  I waited for you to sleep.Then ran away;

I suppose we'd make a great match, I bet.        Only to get caught the next day.

I was minutes from being euthanized,              As punishment you starved me thin

But I was being scrutinized                                  Laying there I eventually realized,

by you to be adopted.                                            I'd rather be euthanized.

I couldn't believe my fate;

Would've been a gonner at this rate.

No.I was set free.

You were friendly at first,

That I could underestand.

However, you gave me the back of your hand.

I fetched you things, tried to behave;

You still beat me like a slave.

I was miserable---I would remember;

Wouldn't feel any better, but worse, come December.

That stuff you'd drink made you scary

Especially your fat neighbor..."Uncle Larry"

I wanted to tell you to stop;