I stand in front of the ivory-rimmed mirror

Wrapped in a towel, water dripping from my hair

I drop the towel and look at my skinny self

Not enough –

Not clear enough skin, not bright enough eyes

Not big enough breasts, not thick enough thighs

Not long enough legs, not sharp enough mind

Not bold enough soul, not courage enough to fight

My nails dig into my palm, tears blear my eyes

The voices in my head get louder

Not enough, not enough they say

I try to scream back that I am okay

But my voice is choked, my will unsteady

The person in the mirror looks unconvinced

I pick up the towel, wipe my tears and step back

She recedes into the mirror

But the trenchant eyes still follow me

I won’t let you, I say and turn away

I perch myself on the ledge of the open French window

I sit on the edge and let my feet sway

I see her no more, the voices hush, their words fade away

As I dive into the oblivion, I am finally free