Laughing Again
It’s a funny story now:
A collection of anecdotes and funny jokes,
A reminder of the worst days of her life.
She laughs as she tells wide-eyed friends
Horror stories,
The likes of which
Should be confined
To strangers’ lives or late-night television.
She laughs because that was her life.
She laughs because it is not any more.
She laughs because the soul-sucking darkness,
The pain and the marks,
Are fading with time now.
She laughs because she can now.
She laughs because her stomach is full
And her hands are warm now.
She laughs because she’s ok with that now,
Or at least learning to be ok with it.
The hunger, the cold, the pain,
The dizziness, the fear and the panic-
They are fading, replaced with emotions now.
Sometimes it’s anger and hatred,
Sometimes it’s sadness,
Sometimes it’s horrible guilt,
And she wants to go back to numbness.
But sometimes it’s joy,
Happiness and warmth flooding her body,
Where she hadn’t felt it in so long
Before she decided to take the plunge
And live again.
And it is times like these
That keep her laughing
And alive.